The cool breeze is rough against the little skin showing of his face and hands, Jimin rushed to get to the coffee shop he just started working at 2 weeks ago running away from the freezing cold outside. Jimin got inside heading straight behind the counter to start taking the costumers’ orders. That’s actually all Jimin did, he didn’t have any actual skills of making coffee, he didn’t even need the money. Sure he was just a student but his parents were wealthy enough to buy him the world. But sometimes money doesn’t mean anything, it sure was the last thing on his mind. He just needed a distraction, and school wasn’t enough, that’s why he asked Jin Hyung if he could manage a job for him in his Cafe.

Jimin sure overworked himself. And for good reasons. He was in school till 3pm, then he had dance practice till 6 pm, he would go home to take a shower, eat something even though he hardly does, try to kill some time by reading books or doing his homework. At 9pm he heads to the coffee shop for his nightshift. He was actually surprised the first time he saw so many costumers stay till 1am or 2am, but it was understandable since the coffee shop is the closest to the university and students come to get their dose of caffeine to finish whatever homework or assignments they had.

Jimin was only supposed to work till midnight, but he insisted to stay till Jin closes which is usually at 3 or 3:30am. Jimin had developed a case of insomnia in the latest months, the most he can sleep in a day is 1 hour and it rarely happens. He hoped that if he would overwork himself and fill every second of his day by any type of activity, he could escape, he’d be too sleepy, too tired to move, too tired to think. But he never escaped his mind, he never escaped the thoughts that would haunt him when he’s home staring at the ceiling, the voices of self blame in his head, the killing loud silence echoing around him. Jimin manages to get knocked down once every weekend, where he would sleep for less than 7 hours, and then his long week would begin again.

Jimin heard the door of the cafe open where two figures made it in and Jimin’s breathe hitched, eyes widened with a burn of tears begging to be let out. The two males who made it through were holding hands, the slightly shorter one clutching the other’s arm with his other hand in an attempt of bringing them closer to fight the harsh cold outside, were obnoxiously laughing. Happiness, love, youth shined in their bright eyes, making Jimin die a little bit inside. It’s been months, since he has last seen the tall boy with broad shoulders, jet black hair that was now a dark brown, his wide eyes that once looked at him with burning love as well. Jimin tried to convince himself that he was getting better in the last 2 weeks, that it has been way too long since that day, that he had too much distractions to be thinking about the Tall boy or the events of the day everything came to an end. But every attempt at lying to himself came crashing down as soon as the couple took a step inside of the coffee shop.

Jimin felt his heart racing, his hands became sweaty, fingers shaking and body trembling, he tried but he just couldn’t help and look up at the couple who made their way into the small table in the corner. The boy with a wide boxy smile trying to get off the other’s lap obviously trying to go order, while the one invading Jimin’s every waking hour, jokingly kept pulling him to his lap again before finally giving his boyfriend a kiss on the cheek and releasing him to go order. Jimin felt his heart twist in pain, like hundreds of knives invaded his chest at the same time, pulled out to only cut through him again and again, millions of thoughts swimming in his head making it throb, high pitched whistling like noises piercing through his ears, he was on the verge of a break down, he could feel it. He could recognize all the symptoms of a panic attack that he’d had multiple times in that last couple of months. The blinding pain in his chest, the speed of his heartbeat, the trembling traveling all over his body, the chaos in his head, the silence pierced by a loud noise hurting his ears, the silent screams desperate to escape. Jimin felt two strong arms enveloping his shaking body and pulling him into a warm surface. Jimin tried to focus on the strong embrace of Namjoon, Jin’s co owner, the warm hug managing to break him out a little bit of his emotions trying to suck him in in an infinite state of deep darkness, making him look up to see the worried face of the boy with the boxy smile that was turned into a deep frown. Namjoon turned him around, still keeping his arms around him. Jimin tightened his grip «on his Hyung’s waist with small shaking fingers, hiding his face in the older’s chest, his knees almost giving up on holding his weight up. Luckily Namjoon could sense the weakness of Jimin and the slight weight put onto him so he quickly moved his arms under the younger’s thighs to hold him up with no effort and pulling him closer. The boy watched the scene with worried and confused eyes, Namjoon gave him a ressuring smile and said:

« I’m sorry; my co owner would be here in a second to take your order »

Namjoon turned around, holding the crying angel in his arms and entered the kitchen. He sat on one of the chairs with Jimin sitting on his lap, sobs still shaking his fragile body.

« Babe, a customer is waiting to get his order taken, can you take care of it while I get Jiminie to calm down? »

Jin didn’t even respond and he rushed out of the kitchen, knowing well that Jimin hated noise when he had these break downs, he never needed words, he just needed to be held tight till his sobs turned into soft shaky breaths, till his eyes dried, till his mind shuts down, till the numbness would take over his body once again. So that’s what Namjoon did.

After 15 minutes, Jimin pulled his face out of Namjoon’s neck and looked up at his Hyung.

« Better Minnie ? »

« Yes, I’m Okay Hyung. »

Silence engulfed them again, Namjoon just pulled Jimin to his chest again and the younger rested his head on his shoulder.

« He showed up, he was there, with his new boyfriend. I can see why. Taehyung really is beautiful. »

Namjoon just kept silent, he never needed to say anything, words were meaningless to Jimin, He’s been lied to multiple times. So the elder just held him tighter.

« I love you » « I’m sorry I don’t love you anymore »

« I would never leave you » « I’m sorry, I just can’t stay anymore »

« I have to go back to work now Hyung »

« You don’t have to Jiminie, you don’t have to go back out there again, just take the rest of the day off »

« No, I’m Okay »

Jimin got up, and went back, Jin looked back at him and gave him a worried look.

« jiminie, He’s still here. Are you sure? »

« I’m fine Hyung »

Jin walked to him, planted a kiss to his forehead and headed back to the kitchen.

Jimin moved his gaze to the couple in the corner, Taehyung was typing away on his laptop, then their eyes met, Jimin stood still, a blank look on his face, his eyes tired and empty. He kept Jungkook’s gaze, he couldn’t pinpoint the emotions swiming in them, it was just a dark sorrowful gaze that almost reflected how Jimin felt, it sent a shiver down his spine. Jimin knew that the sorrow wasn’t felt by his ex, but he knew it was what he assumed Jimin was going through, kind of like a pity coated but a thin layer of guilt.

« Tae, let’s leave »

« huh but it’s hardly been 20 minutes, I’ve just started my assignment » Taehyung gave his boyfriend a confused look.

« Sorry babe, I just found out I forgot the books I needed, we can take the coffee and finish at your room »

« Okay »

The coffee shop was small; it was hard not to overhear a conversation when most of the people there were too busy with their own studies at this moment. When they got closer to where Jimin stood behind the counter, Jungkook turned to his boyfriend and gave him the key to his car.

« Can you go start the car while I pay for our coffee »

« Sure babe »

Once Taehyung was out of the door, Jungkook walked over to Jimin. The older didn’t wait for him to say anything and said; even though he was aware that prices were clear on the headboard.

« It’s 6690.34 won »

« O-okay » Jungkook handed him the money but remained still, not sure what to do or say. After a few minutes that felt like hours for both of them, Jungkook decided to break it :

« Jimi-«

« Taehyung seems like a lovely kid »

« O-oh um I guess.. » jungkook mumbled, guilt swirling in his stomach, the scene of earlier playing in his head over and over. He almost didn’t recognize the boy that was once a ball of sunshine filled with all the positivity in the world.

« Jimin-ah.. » Jimin knew that tone very much and he couldn’t handle it, it was like hearing the younger’s voice coated with that fucking tone of pity physically hurt his ears and made his stomach churn.

« Don’t Jungkook. Just don’t. »

« I’m So-.. »

« Don’t you say that word. What are you sorry for? You chose this »

« I J-just..I really feel so-.. »

« No please Jungkook, Don’t say you’re sorry for not loving me back. You’re not sorry, Just stop. Please leave »

« Jiminie.. »

« Leave, or I’ll call Namjoon-Hyung »

Jungkook bowed his head down, He didn’t know what to do, how to feel, what to feel everything was just all over the place, he walked away in a mix of emotions of guilt and sadness, and rush of memories and regrets.

Jimin let out a breath and collapsed to the ground, breath shaky with new tears filling his tears. He only blinked before Jin was sitting beside him, holding on to him tightly in a sense of protection, hoping that maybe if he just help into him a little tighter, he could rid him of grief locking the beautiful angel in a death lock. But everything was too late. The angel was already broken.

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I hope you like it,

And remember, if you're having a bad day, always remember that you live in a world that has a very cute and cheerful Jimin, that's an enough reason to smile right?