From as long as I can remember my life has been well lonely. From the day I was born I have been unwanted. my birth parents didn't want me. They left me with a complete stranger. This stranger I called him father for years till I learned he was not my father. I did grow up with my biological mother but it's hard to call her a mother when every day from the day I was born I was scared for my life. you would think a woman who gave birth to you would love you but not her she hated me but I didn't know why till I saw her with the person she called a cousin now that's where things get strange you would think cousins are supposed to be like cousins but they weren't they were close almost too close like they were in love I didn't question it till one day I walked into my room at the age of let's say 3. I remember it quite clearly her and her cousin doing things that well only adults was supposed to do. and when I yelled because I saw something no it's supposed to see she threatened me said if I tell my dad who wasn't really my dad that I saw them do it she wouldn't hurt me in ways I could never imagine but jokes on her she hurt me multiple times before that from the age of three and up my life has been nothing but being hit yelled at and going from hospital to hospital and please being called out because I looked too skinny but don't worry I was being fed. and when I turned five she finally left for good and I was happy for a while only a while just a little bit of peace still I was 10. that is when things get really really interesting. the man I called my father when soon realized his little girl. and you can guess where I'm going with this he raped me and he will continue to do so until I left. I could never try to fight back it's when I did I would get thrown punched had things done at me. and every time I told him it was wrong I'm your daughter he would turn around and say no no you're not you're just some other man's daughter you remember that cousin of your mother's guess what you're his now shut up. my life was filled with shut UPS for as long as I can remember trust me it's tiring. I started working at the age of 16 was able to get out of the house for a few hours school was fun but no one understood work was even worse cuz every day I was talked down to by people who did not even know my life and I faked I faked being happy then they believed me until one day one day I broke.

I remember the day I broke down I had enough of everything my life at school was well bad to say the least. but hey you would say work would have to be a lot better right. no it wasn't I would leave school and have lots of homework from different classes because at the time I was on what they called The Fast Track. I was trying to leave trying to get out of what I was in. being at home I was scared that I was going to get hurt again by that man. at school I was bullied well I was bullied till they realized hey she's the crazy white girl. and yeah they called me the crazy girl. and me being the crazy girl every time a guy would try to mess with me I would fight I knew I would lose but I still thought. sometimes you have to fight even if it's hard. so when my breakdown happened it happened at work. you see I worked at a little restaurant. a chain but we were kind of what you called not up to par. one day we had a blackout the power came back on but our systems were still down. and it happened while I was taking care of a guest. the guest yelled berated me and blamed me that he could not pay with his card. telling me it's my fault I should let him have his food for free. and when I told him no you can leave your friend here and you can go to the bank right across from us and get some money out there he yelled cursed. but finally his friend calmed him down when he went to the bank after him and his friend left. that man came in and yelled at me asking why am I at home not at home. so me being the good girl and a lot of people's eyes at work just said I'm sorry sir I'll be home shortly the systems are down so I can't leave. and I told him once the systems come back up I'll be able to leave. that man did not stop he wouldn't leave me alone. the restaurant I work at wanted to kick him for life but they couldn't unless they wanted to lose me. you see he would not let me work there unless he knew no guys were going to hit on me. they once was Guy younger than me that started working there and he was gay but that man didn't know so every time the young guy talked to me and it was in front of that man. he would threaten to beat him hurt him even kill him. so I told the young guy leave me alone don't ever talk to me and he did just that. that young guy left me alone didn't talk to me didn't look at me until he left that's for college and that was 3 years. and after he left I broke down. I cried I drew a plate of this food that no one wanted it was what was called Dead. I do it across the kitchen I Cry and I was moved to the office to cry even more. and once I got home after all that that man asked why why are you sad why are you depressed why are you always in your room. I told him no I had a hard day at work I'll be fine in a minute let me get change and we'll watch a movie that sounds like fun right. he looked at me didn't answer. but no it wasn't fun it never is.