😡 again!

an other proposal! what the hell up with my parents!

😑 They were the one who told me, don't start a relationship while studying..... and now they are busy with finding a partner for me!

🤔 it's true no one court me either yet 🤦‍♀️ but it's not my fault being a student of a girl's college! 💁‍♀️ I'm just little chubby, but still cute! eh, I guess! 🙂

😒 indeed there's no need for them to bring proposal from a someone 12 years older than me!

👉 "I mean age gap of 4, 5 years ok! but 12.... damn 12 years? 😳" 👈 this what my friends ask back me when I discuss my situation with them!

Here I go again.... 💔 an other sleep less night full with pain, confusion and disappointment!

😢 it's been 25 years. I'm still no one. just a girl glued with manga, K pop idols and daydreams!

"+" 😎 the president of NO JOB company!

Never had a boyfriend yet while some of my friends having boyfriends than the count of bras I'm owning by myself! 🙄 Many them cheat with many boys but at the end they found the perfect match! but me, thinking always of being loyal, lovable and respectful to my future boyfriend, but still never met that superhero 🙃 maybe he's not exist in this world! maybe not born yet or die already? 😶 or maybe in Mars or Jupiter or another planet that I don't even know the name?

okay! I know I'm not good at astronomy 😖

aish! " I HATE MYSELF!"

I was one of the most talented student at school when I was 16 y.o. but now....... what happened to me... my laziness hunted me or am I really unlucky....?

it can't say I was inactive, I tried so hard to become successful 😔 but, I failed and failed... after many trials I gave up. maybe it's not my fault but my fault!

🤕 I always think everything will become successful if I choosed an other field, but 😪 I can't guarantee changing path will change my destiny... maybe I was born to be a no one and a loser... that why i failed every time and finally gave up. so, is it fair that I'm become jealous with successful people easily?

NOOOOOOO! i don't want 😭 what is this! what happened with me... not only a looser and a unlucky girl.. but also a jealousy ***! and someone become angry easily cause of failing life... No No No! don't be so! I don't wanna become a cruel and bad guy from stories... no 😭 I don't want this!

"I HATE ME, I HATE ME, I HATE ME! 😭"

please bad, don't come to me! leave me!

🙏 wish if I could travel back to the past like in many mangas/manhuwas/comics...

I'll change every mistake I've done... 😥

I'll become more effective and work hard like my idol.

but,

😪 I know...... that will never happen!

*as usual... I felt a sleep again thinking this facts never come true....

yes! this two thing that I always wanted to come true magically but I know that will never become true!

travel through time to the past

meet jungkook for real 😍

forever dreams forever ever 💔😢

everything gone is gone! let's fly the past in the past! eh, my eyes are still hurting as I was crying whole night! maybe cucumber slices will be helped!

but, who's rubbing through my hair! omg! this feels so good! this soft and warm feeling 😍 ok! now I'm sure this is not the pillow but someone's lap!

is this mom? but it's the first time she treats me like this.... I love this feeling.... 😶 but wait, I'm sure that I locked my door! 😳

I suddenly opened my eyes!

"huh! jungkook?" my voice disobeyed me... but he was just smiling with his cute puppy eyes...

🥺 omgwsh! his silky hair, pretty face with perfect v-line! 😖 pinky lips! smooth skin ..... not only my voice but also my hands disobeyed me... 🥰 his cheeks feels so soft and wanna keep touching whole day!

THIS DREAM FEEL SO REALISTIC! aish I wanna take the full advantage of this super dream! anyway it's a dream 💁‍♀️ I can be naughty freely, no one will judge me on my own dream!

I ran my other hand through his chest to neck and put my hands around his neck! then softly rubbed his nose tip with my nose tip playfully! I realized he wouldn't hesitate 🙉 anyway it's my dream, so why would he?

I showed a light smile on my lips while touching softly back of his neck... my heart start beating faster... 🙈 but I really don't wanna stop. maybe this is the only dream I'm feeling him so close to me! I push myself and kissed his lips once and returned to the position I was before! I looked into his eyes but that look was on his eyes burnt me to the death!

omg! what have I done... even it's a dream I should have controlled myself! he is my idol 😟 I should respect him, I should have control myself! what a shameless stupid girl 🤦‍♀️ if other fans realized I did this they will destroy both me and my dream world! even though if he wasn't popular but a regular guy... 😖 I'm a girl, why I was act so? eh, what's up with me!

* i tighten up my eyes and opened them to see his face again! and he smiled cutely! that is the most cutest bunny smile I've ever seen! that made me feel shy! omg! feels like my cheeks are getting red! am I blushing? aish, this situation is so shameful! i suddenly hid my face under his chest and tightly closed my eyes!

i guess it's time to wake up from this dream, i have no more guts to continue this dream! i opened my eyes!

"huh! why am I still in the same place! didn't this dream should fade away already?" i murmured to myself!

"so you think it's a dream?" I felt his breath on my ear! it's, it's 🥺🙉 it's his voice! kookie's sweet voice that all are addicted to!

*he bit the end of my ear softly and whispers "do you still think it's a dream little girl?"

when he bit me a shiver ran through my body! but if it's a dream....then how I feel it so real?

I feel like he's starting at me.... "no, it can't be" I told!

now there's only one way to check! I pinched up my own hand hardly!

🤕 OUCH!