"You are going to marry your brother! Don't you feel ashamed!"

"You're disgusting!"

"You should go and lock yourself in the room. You're normalising the family romance!"

"Stay away you disgusting brat!"

"I cringe when I'm around you!"

This is what I went through when I finally accepted my step brother's marriage proposal. Why? Why is it disgusting when he isn't even blood related to me?

"I want to stay away from you! Please leave me alone!" Saying this I finally hurt him. The one who loved me no matter what or how I am.

Why is life so unfair to him?

I want to give him all the love that he deserves. What do I do?

I cry when I see him sad. Why did I met him in first place! I still regret that day.

15 years ago, when I was just 9 years old. I saw my mother dying in front of me.

She had cancer. She was at hospital counting her last breath. I was looking at her through the window.

When the doctor noticed me, he immediately ordered the nurses to shut the curtains.

That I realised, life is cruel.

My father arrived at the hospital when my mom already passed away. I cried a lot that day.

The whole month passed and nobody of me and my father was able to live our life like before when mom was alive.

We were lost. We saw no hopes in our lives. Even though my father tried best, he still couldn't manage being with me 24 hours.

The neighbours and even the relatives suggested him to marry someone and get me a new mom to take care of me and spend time with me.

I totally disagreed but that's what was right.

He married a new women. I thought that she'd love only me but I was wrong.

Years ago, his husband had died. She couldn't get pregnant so she adopted a child.

That child of her was older than me, he was an adult.

When I first time saw him, I felt the coldness around him. He was so tall and was smorinh cigarette. I walked to him and ended up coughing.

The coughs were killing me. He immediately threw the cigarette on the street and crushed it with his feet. He bent down and asked in a gentle voice, "Hey. Are you fine?"

His voice reminded me of my mother who used to be so kind and caring towards me. I was touched.

That's how I met him. Todd, my step brother who at that time was 20 years old.

I was so short in front of him, and was coughing. So he carried me in his arms and smiled, "Sorry buddy." and then rubbed my back. It felt warm.

My step mother was kind and humble too. I could see a caring mother in her but may be she couldn't see that caring husband in my father.

My father loved my mom a lot. He just married another woman just to get me a new mom. He never treated her like a wife.

My step mother was so kind that she still used to care for him. She didn't demand anything in exchange. She just smiled it off.

Brother Todd used to be quite distressed about it. He used to smoke and drink. Mother used to stop him but he would always end up fighting with her, "Who do you think I am? I'm not a kid anymore!"

I saw mother crying inside but she never let the tears fall. I was slowly beginning to see mom in her. I felt so bad for her so I gave her a warm hug.

One day I decided to go and talk to brother Todd. He was again drinking. It was night." Brother " called from behind.

At first he ignore me. I repeated again, "Brother?" he finally turned around and had a look at me. But again, he ignored me.

This pissed me off, "You're so mean! Can't you see mother is sad!" I shouted at him.

May be this made him anger. He stood up and bend down. He smirked, "You little punk. Go and mind your business. Don't mess with adults." He said and went away.

This really pissed me off. Why are adults like this?

Next day, it was a nice morning. Father was out on a business tour. Me and my mother were alone at home. She served me food and I ate it. I really enjoyed it so I thanked her.

"Mother. It was so delicious." I said and gave her a kiss on cheeks. She rubbed my head and kissed me back, "My sweet child." she smiled.

I felt happy seeing her smile. Perhaps I could do at least this much.

After sometime, she came to me. I was in my room doing my homework when she called my name, "Sweetheart. I'm going out to buy groceries. Tell the guards if you need anything. Okay?" she said and smiled.

I nodded and she left.

I was alone at home, doing my homework. I was biting my pencil when i saw brother Todd falling in front of me. I didn't even realise when did he came there.

"Brother! Are you alright!" I rushed towards him. He stinked. He must have drunk a lot. He pushed my hand away, "Stay away. Alcohol's smell stinks. I know."

I shook my head, "No, its okay." It wasn't okay though.

He stood up and sighed, "Kid, what were you doing? Homework?"

"Hm." I nodded.

"Good. Study hard. Okay?" He rubbed my head and left to his room.

This was the first time he talked to me nicely. It made me smile.

Mother had returned. "My child. What were you doing?"

"Homework." I replied.

"Did your brother come back?" She asked me. Her voice sounded upset. May be she knew that brother had drink again.

"Yes, he returned." I replied with my head down. I couldn't look her in eye. She was sad. I couldn't dare to see that.

It was evening, when i was returning to my room after dinner with mom. Brother hadn't eaten anything. When i peeked inside his room, he was smoking. I couldn't get why he was always so sad and depressed. I wanted to talk to him but he was scary sometimes.

Perhaps he saw me, he gestured telling me to come in. I feared him, so i obeyed and got in. He had threw the smoke in his feet and crushed it. His room was a mess. All the clothes here and there, cigarettes on the ground, alcohol on the table, snacks and books on bed, a total mess.

"Don't mind the mess. Just come here." He said.

I nodded.

"Sam." He called me name. I looked at him. "Do you think I'm bad?"

I was confused what to say. I shook my head, "No-"

"Don't lie. It shows on your face." He said and took a cigarette from his pack.

I couldn't see him smoking, so i eventually stopped his hand. Shouldn't have done that because his scary glance scared me a lot.

"What do you mean by that?" He asked me in an angry tone.

"I'm...I'm sorry." I said and backed off, "I'll just leave!" I said and ran away from there.

I immediately went back to my room, panting. I was scared.

I just lied on my bed and closed my eyes, trying to sleep.

Next morning, mother made me breakfast and a lunch box for school. I thanked her and carried my bag.

"Is it okay if brother drops you today?" She asked me. I could see the concern on his face.

I didn't want to worry her. So i just nodded, "Its okay." I smiled.

She looked relieved.

"Sorry, but i cant drop him. I have work to deal." Brother todd interrupted. His eyes really had those big dark circles as if he didn't sleep the whole night.

"Please don't say that." Mom said without looking at him.

"Why do you think I'll do as you say?" Brother todd said while staring at mom.

Now i realized that i never saw mom looking at Todd in eyes. She looked guilty.

My brother was going somewhere in his car, so he couldn't drop me to school. I didn't want to bother him.

"Mother, don't worry. I can go by myself."

"What are you talking about? Let the guards drop you." She kind of scolded me as i made her worried.

"Really. Its not that far anyways. Also, i think kids should walk." I smiled.

May be, i convinced her. She nodded, "Okay. But be careful okay."

I nodded. Actually, my school wasn't that far from home. Also, kids my age used to go school by themselves as well. So i could also go.

I walked out of the gate. Brother Todd was in his car, lightning a cigarette.

He didn't even look at me. I wanted to say goodbye to him. But, anyways.

I just left.

I didn't even walk so far yet, when I saw these dogs coming towards me. This scared me, so j started running back. Seeing me running, the dogs also started chasing me. I was too scared, scared to death as I'd never experienced that before.

I was about to cry, when a car stopped beside me. He had the door opened, he pulled me inside from the driver's seat. I screamed as i was scared and startled.

When I turned my head, i found it was brother Todd. I was relieved. I sighed. He immediately closed the car's door. The dogs backed off and disappeared soon.

"What do you think you were doing ah?" He scolded me in his deep and scary voice.

His big hands were around my waist, holding me while i was on his lap with my head down. I was guilty.

"I'm sorry...I bothered you again." I apologised.

He sighed and made me sit on the seat beside him. "Listen, I'll drop you school but don't tell mom." He said, "Okay?"

I was confued but i just nodded, "Ok-ay."

He dropped me school. I was happy because it was first time he dropped me. I was smiling on our way to school while he drove in a very cool way with a black wristwatch and black clothes. Guess he loved black colour so much.

We were now school. I got out of the car and put my bag on my back.

"Wait." Brother said.

I waited. He hesitated for a while, then asked, "What's the time your school ends?"

"At 4." I replied.

He just nodded and drove away. "I wonder why he asked the time?"

I went inside anyway.

Today I had a scince test. The science teacher was someone i really really hated. How do i even say it. He used to touch the female students in a wrong way. Like, really really wrong way. Those young girls couldn't even take step against him.

I disgusted whenever i looked at him.

He was young but really disgusting. Imgaine if a handsome person like him had a beautiful heart as well, how good would that be.

He passed us the paper. "You get 15 minutes for the test everyone." He said.

We completed the test. I didn't know the answer of 3 questions honestly. I got 14 out of 20. That wasn't so good. I sighed.