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PICK UP LINE SYSTEM

Prologue: The perfect protagonist

These were the most powerful and influential people in the world, yet as he approached them, he only had one thought. 'In my eyes, you're all nothing...'

It was an extravagant hall, with men and women in lavish formal wear socializing, when the butler at the entrance glanced at the dark-haired man stepping inside, and made an announcement to the guests. "Sir. Roman Antonov!"

At the mere mention of this name, the chatter in the party died down, as everyone turned towards the entrant, revealing gazes of curiosity, desire, and fear...

In a black tuxedo, his imposing tall handsome presence loomed over the room, as everyone whispered amongst each other.

"It's him! The famous billionaire in the flesh! I only just saw him on the cover of Forbes. What's he doing here? Wasn't his company listed on the Dow Jones yesterday?"

"Yes, quite remarkable. I read he came from poverty only a few years ago. Just how did he accomplish it?"

"Is that the famous playboy? I heard he bought a 400-foot yacht he fills with supermodels every weekend. They say his estate is a real-life harem!"

"What I can't comprehend is how he finds time for so many things. I was there when he won the US Open this year. He's the best pro tennis player I've ever seen!"

Even a couple of posh, sweet-looking elderly women in the corner couldn't help discussing the legends of this notorious figure. "Hmm…there are rumors he's involved with some unsavory elements as well…high stakes gambling, mafia, weapons dealing… I've heard whispers of another matter too, but remember—you didn't hear any of this from me."

"What?" the listener replied.

"I've heard he's got a big d*ck."

"Gasp… Harriet, stop it!"

Roman had already grown accustomed to people gazing at him in amazement long ago. In fact, he was renowned for his cool head and even colder heart. Despite that, there was a sheen of sweat on his forehead as he scanned around the room for someone.

A moment later, when he spotted a conspicuous brown-haired beauty holding a glass of champagne under the chandelier, surrounded by aristocrats fawning over her, he narrowed his eyes, because he'd found her...

This woman was most uncommon: gorgeous, elegant, and with one outstanding difference from all others in the hall—she wore a tiara.

Gulping, Roman approached her, as he put on his confident smile; the one that had proved irresistible to hundreds of the most beautiful women in the world...

A few seconds later, as she was chatting with a French diplomat, a familiar voice came from her side: "Princess…it's been so long."

Hearing this deep charming tone, she recognized who it was in an instant, and did her best to stifle the quiver spreading throughout her body... A trace of dangerous desire flashed in her eyes though, before she restrained it with her strength of mind developed through decades of being in the public eye. Having regained composure, she turned to him. "Mr. Antonov, what a delight it is to see you again."

With a self-assured expression, Roman stared into her eyes. "The pleasure is all mine..." Then, he took her white-gloved hand in his, and bowed as he brought it to his lips, holding it a moment longer than customary as he locked gazes with her.

At his touch, her heart quaked...but the princess maintained her composure, despite her breathing becoming a touch heavier...

From then on, Roman launched into conversation, his charisma overpowering everyone nearby, helping him gain a monopoly on the beauty's attention. One by one, everyone but him and her stepped away. Their instincts gave them a clear signal--they were no longer welcome here.

Soon, chatting turned into subtle flirting, and not long after that, scandalous whispers…

The princess' eyes glanced around with anxiety, as her mannerisms and occasional touches began to skirt on the line of what was appropriate...

Roman smirked, because this was what he wanted to see. He'd been attempting to seduce this beautiful princess for a while now, but there were two big roadblocks standing in his way: the unwritten laws of high society, and the fact that she was married…

Plus, for one reason or another, unlucky circumstances kept befalling him when he tried to advance with her, delaying his pursuit.

Today though, as the sweat continued to accumulate on his face, he swore to himself he would conquer her. 'This is it. I only need to get her alone.' Roman already pre-arranged everything: paying off the staff of the event, accomplices in the background, and even every line that left his mouth. There was only one step remaining: to take her to the back of this hall to the chosen private room, and **** **** to her at last...

Giggling and blushing, the princess' expression couldn't hide her lust...letting him know the moment arrived. 'She's ready!'

However, as he was about to say the final line, a commotion ensued!

*Tap* *Tap* *Tap* *Tap*

Out of nowhere, a butler sprinted through the crowd, panting as he came over to the princess and whispered something into her ear, and as the words reached her, she turned pale!

Her breathing became a mess as she lost all traces of her royal composure! With shaky lips, she only managed to say a few words to Roman. "I-I'm sorry...I have to go! The Queen! M-my mother had an accident!" Then, she rushed out of the ballroom!

Frozen in disbelief, he watched as she ran out of the party. A few seconds later though, when Roman recovered from the shock, sweat poured down his face! He charged out after her with a frenzied expression!

When he reached outside though, scanning the surroundings under the moonlight, he saw what he feared most--her pretty face through the window of a helicopter! As the rotor blades spun and it began to lift off!

His eyes gleamed and without hesitation, he sprinted towards the chopper! Moving at an insane pace! Almost inhuman!

Observing this, the security outside the helicopter became startled! They moved to bar his way in front! Yet they couldn't stop him at all! He pushed each one to the side with ease! Sending them flying several feet!

Looking back at his target, Roman prepared to do anything it took!

However, the helicopter…was already in the air, climbing high up above him...

"NOOOOO!!!" As it flew into the distance, Roman's face lost all color, his arms going limp as he dropped to his knees...

"It can't end like this... It can't end like this..." he mumbled and over.

Everyone nearby stared, confused by his strange behavior.

"What's the matter with him?"

"Has he gone insane from wealth?"

"No, I understand his pain. I've made the same mistake—that caviar was rubbish."

...

A short while later...Roman stood up in a daze, staggering off alone into the nearby trees, as onlookers gazed on in doubt.

***

Half an hour later, Roman had wandered to the edge of a majestic lake.

Gazing down at his own reflection, he barely recognized himself; so different from only a few years ago…

"It can't end like this. I've worked so hard...Changed so much..." His breaths became ragged as he gnashed his teeth with such force, he could taste blood...

"I did everything you asked! I've come so far! You can't do this to me now!"

Staring into the water, his eyes filled with unwillingness, and hatred, as they turned bloodshot, and then--crimson red...

Shaking, he looked up at the moon, and howled!

All of a sudden, his muscles began to bulge! His pristine tailored Savile Row tuxedo started to tear! Hair grew on his face and body, soon covering it! His skeletal structure morphed as his head extended outwards! His height and bulk grew! He ripped out of his suit! Leaving not a man, but a monster! A humanoid beast! A savage creature! A werewolf!

"AWOOOOOOOO!"

Yet no matter how much he changed, one thing didn't—his fury! Glancing down at his raging reflection, Roman roared! Roaring at his failure! Roaring at the world! Roaring at his fate! In desperation, he punched down into the lake!

*BOOM*

It wasn't a splash but an explosion! Water shot up dozens of feet into the sky! Nearby animals ran in terror!

You could even see the bottom of the lake! He'd split the water in two!

However, regardless of how much he bellowed, and growled, and raged, the screen in front of him, the one only he could see, never stopped counting down.

[Death Challenge: Royal Spreading - Seduce a married woman who is a nation's royal of at least princess-tier]

[Time remaining: 00:00:03]

[Time remaining: 00:00:02]

[Time remaining: 00:00:01]

With his clawed finger pointing to the sky, the infamous billionaire roared upwards, until...all his noise suddenly stopped, as he froze like a statue, viewing the last message he'd ever receive in his life.

[Time remaining: 00:00:00]

As his mind faded, there was only one last thought, a final glimmer of hope before potential oblivion. 'Maybe…I can reincarna—'

[Death Challenge failed]

[Punishment: Annihilation]

[Commencing punishment]

The next moment, from top to bottom, Roman's body...disintegrated into ashes...scattering into the wind over the once again tranquil lake...

[Punishment completed: Host's body…and soul destroyed]

...

No reincarnation for him. Just ashes…

Maybe a passing turtle or some crabs...

Regardless...there was only one thing remaining of him in this place--the screen, the one that no one could see anymore...and even that, would merely last a few moments.

[Detecting lack of a host]

[Previous host data stored for review. Searching for next host. Sigh...]

A few minutes later, a man and woman wearing black cloaks walked out of the shadows of the forest area, stopping at the place where Roman died. If one could describe their facial features, they'd only give one word--perfect.

They were the peak of beauty.

Gazing at the lake, the man spoke. "It's over."

The woman nodded. "Another system user wiped...Well done." She bent down and pushed her index finger into the sand, picking up a tiny inconspicuous piece of ash, which was now, just another piece of sand...

She stared at it for a while...before standing up, and rubbing her hands together to clean them off. "Call our people holding the family of that chef from the Queen's staff. Tell them to follow procedure."

However, out of her expectation, the man's face became grim. "I'm afraid I can't obey that command, my lady."

Hearing that, she froze for a moment, as she prepared herself...for combat. "Oh…why not?" Turning to face him, her expression grew icy. 'Is he going to rebel?'

The man stared at her, as tension filled the air like the clashing of blades. He hadn't planned for it to come to this, but now, there was no other choice but to make his declaration. His eyes narrowed. "I'm out..."

'Does he really think he can quit?' At these words, the woman's bloodlust became almost tangible. It was time...for one of them to die.

"Of minutes on my phone..."

...

With his serious expression, he clarified. "I need a phone...to order murders."

*Bonk*

Her Samsung bounced off his forehead.

 

Chapter 1: Seduce or die

Ben thought being a ****** was bad enough. Now, he even had to die for it.

It all started when he began his freshman year at New York University in the entering class of 2019. When he got off the train in Manhattan, his eyes shone from the surrounding splendor. In every direction, there were skyscrapers, luxury shops, and most importantly...beauties of every type imaginable!

'This is the beginning of my colorful student life!' is what he thought to himself, right before a taxi drove over a puddle and soaked him in grimy street water. He became brown and putrid.

'That was just a little bad luck…it's nothing.' Full of unshakeable optimism, he walked through Times Square, gazing up with joy at the massive digital billboards. In particular, the caption of one caught his attention: "Billionaire Roman Antonov has mysteriously disappeared, after last being seen at a state ball in Stockholm." Reading this, Ben blinked. 'A billionaire vanished, huh? I wonder if he left to become the love interest in a cliche female romance novel...'

Finished musing, Ben shook his head as he continued walking, not paying attention to the changing screen which read, "In other recent news, the health scare for the Queen of Sweden has proven to be a false alarm. Reporters have confirmed the fainting spell was nothing serious, and have quoted her as saying, 'It was just gas...'"

A while later, Ben arrived at his university dormitory with a bright smile and a warm heart. It was a shame the other students didn't notice that, instead focusing on his filthy appearance from the puddle splash earlier. Many even pointed and laughed at the "Wet dirty burrito" passing through. A student on his floor from the graphic design department even made memes of him, posting them on flyers all over the walls of his dormitory floor: "Do you want me in a bowl or pita bread?"

"Guacamole is extra."

"Eat me if you want diarrhea."

They were all signed "Wet Dirty Burrito King" and even had his room number written on them.

"My colorful student life…I can't let it end like this!" is what he said to himself, right before he saw the 50 "Personal burrito orders" written on post-its glued to his door.

The students had deemed him the unofficial mascot of Halden Dormitory.

"How can it be like this?" he asked himself, as he sat on the tiny bed of his dorm room. "It hasn't even been a day and I'm already finished. Am I going to remain a ****** forever?"

[Yes] A slightly robotic, bell-like female voice emerged out of nowhere.

"Who said that?!?" He shot up from the bed, searching in every direction but finding no one.

[Congratulations! You have been judged to possess the worst destiny with women]

He responded, "How is that worthy of congratulations? I'm already at rock bottom, and now even ghosts are taking shots at me?!?"

[I am not a ghost. I am the voice of the system speaking within your head]

[Your plight has inspired the charity of the heavens. You've unlocked the Pick Up Artist System!]

His ears perked up when he heard that. "For real?!? Yes! My time has arrived!"

[You have one month to seduce a woman or you will die]

Ben froze with his fists still in the air. "Can you repeat that?"

[One month. Seduce or die]

His excitement degenerated into desperation. "What the hell...how? I'm an 18 year old virgin…"

After taking a minute to calm down, Ben realized it wasn't as bad as he thought. "Ok, it's not impossible. It's college after all, so if I lower my standards to the absolute bottom, it should be doable."

[No slam donkeys. 7+ looks only]

"7+? You might as well tell me to seduce a goddess! And what kind of system talks like that?!?"

Another minute later, Ben came up with another unstoppable plan.

"In the worst case, I can borrow some money and get a ********** somewhere…"

[No pay-pigging]

"You're forcing me to die!"

This time the system didn't contradict him.

Ben tried to come up with other ideas but all he came up with were songs for his funeral.

'I've heard that people diagnosed with terminal illnesses feel more alive than ever before after they find out, so why do I feel like sh*t?' Ben sulked.

"This system's been misnamed. You should call it the Execution System instead. Wait…it is a system in the end. Maybe there's more to it. System, what else can you tell or show me besides insults?"

Appearing out of thin air like a hologram, a transparent blue screen appeared in front of him. It was a vertical menu with a few categories:

[Stats, Challenges, Store]

Ben sighed in relief. "At long last, things are looking up." He opened Stats and read down them one by one.

[Looks: 2 - You're short, chubby, and have idiotic hair. This one was rounded up]

"Rounded up? ...Ok, my looks aren't my strong suit."

[Charisma: 0 - If someone had a choice between hugging you or a fire, they would hug the fire and then chase you for revenge]

[Social Status: 2 - Better than a homeless person, but students are in the bottom rung of society where you live]

"Fair enough."

[Seduction skills: 0 - You might get rejected by a tree]

"…I've never tried. You don't know."

[Knowledge: 4 - More knowledge means more conversation topics. Not too bad]

Ben's head rose upwards in pride.

[Manliness: 1 - You're one step away from being a woman, and this isn't that kind of system]

His head came right back down in shame.

[Communication: 3: You spent your youth talking trash in video games. This achievement is the result of your effort]

[Personal talent: 2. Art, music, sports. How hard is it to find something you're not bad at? Get your life together]

"I've been trying!"

[PUA Points: 550 - Points accrued for accomplishments in Pick Up Artistry. Can be used to purchase items in the Store]

"550, how did I get that?" Ben scanned his memories. He couldn't even remember speaking to any girls since middle school. After a long time, he recalled that he did have a girlfriend in middle school for one summer, and even kissed several other girls that year. That was his golden age, when he was thin and a bit taller than others. It was a beautiful time when he had reason to be bright and optimistic about his future.

It wasn't until high school arrived when everyone else grew, and he stayed the same height, that he realized everything changed. People considered him short from then on. As everyone else became taller and bulkier, his results in athletics became worse and worse, until he even started to get bullied. To escape, he stopped doing sports altogether. He became introverted, spending his time at home playing video games and reading web novels, gaining weight as a result. After that, everyone shunned him.

Only later did he discover that he peaked in middle school, which still made him angry when he thought about it.

"I'm not Harry Potter. Who the hell peaks at 13?!?"

"Forget it. I'll be dead in a month anyway, so it's no time to be upset about the past." Ben decided to move forward and open the Challenges, where he discovered one entry.

[Novice Welcome - Seduce a woman within one month or die]

"…Thanks for the warm welcome." Ben opened Novice Welcome to see if there were any more details.

[Reward: ???]

[Punishment: Eradication]

[Conditions: No slam donkeys, no pay-pigging, ???]

He shook his head and went back to the main menu screen, opening the final Store selection. His brows knitted at what he saw. "Why is there only one item?"

[The system has many functions that are hidden until they're unlocked. That includes store items that you cannot afford with your current balance of PUA Points]

Ben examined the available item.

[Low Level Mystery Box: 500 points - Contains a random item anywhere from trash to rare grade]

Ben had enough points to acquire one of these. It only took him a few moments to come to a decision."I'm already on my way to the abyss. It seems like this Mystery Box is the only hope I have. Maybe I could get something amazing that'll help me."

Before buying it, Ben closed his eyes and clenched his fists. He couldn't stop his forehead from sweating because he knew this was his only chance to live. Desperate but hopeful, Ben steeled himself, opened his eyes, and made the purchase.

A small, candy apple red box with a white question mark on top materialized in front of him, falling into his lap. When he touched it, a bright light filled the room.

Life or death. It was in this little box.

Chapter 2: Divine Pick Up Line

Ben held his breath as his eyes stared downward, shimmering with both fear and hope.

The light faded to reveal his fate. It was…

A ripped off corner of a paper with some scrawling on it.

"Well…good game."

Ben embraced his doom tightly like a long lost lover. In his head, he wrote a bucket list of things to do over the next and final month.

[You have gained Divine Pick Up Line(Consumable, Fine) x1]

"Wait. Divine? That should be a good thing. Then why does this look like a note someone would pass in 3rd grade? The paper isn't even big enough for me to write a goodbye letter to my family."

After a while, Ben surmised that humans just wouldn't be able to understand the artistic sense of whatever god or demon created this system. Instead of pondering the imponderable, he sought more information about the item.

[Divine Pick Up Line(Consumable, Fine) x1 - Use on any woman to quickly raise her attraction to you by a significant amount]

Ben's breathing became heavy. 'This is it...' He spotted a glimmer of light up above, a possibility of escaping the deep crater he was stuck in. This little scrap of paper could be his life-saving rope.

*Creak*

The door opened and a teenage boy that Ben had never seen entered the dorm room. The boy's eyebrows raised when he saw that Ben was already inside. He put his luggage down, straightened his posture, and approached Ben in a formal manner for a handshake. Not wanting to be disrespectful, Ben stood up and shook hands with him.

"Hello, I take it you are Benjamin? I'm Fariq, from India, and we will be roommates from now on. It is a pleasure to meet you. I did not expect to share a room with an established entrepreneur, which is my great honor."

Ben's death sentence had distracted him to the point that he forgot his roommate was coming today. Yet, there was one part of what Fariq said that confused him.

"Entrepreneur?" Ben asked, squinting.

Fariq's back became even straighter. "I have seen the large number of orders at our front door. I am very impressed. It is only the first day and yet you've started a business already. What is the business model? A Mexican delivery food service?" He stared at Ben as if looking at a mentor. Fariq was in the business program, so he needed to learn from real-world start-ups like this if he wanted to launch his own company in the future.

Ben's face was gloomier than a necromancer's Facebook page. "It's nothing great like that. That's a misunderstanding."

Fariq nodded over and over in appreciation. "Modesty is a virtue. Good. Good. I can see that I will learn much from you and am looking forward to becoming friends."

'…Friends.' To Ben, that word was like an idiom in a foreign language; He knew the translation, but he didn't understand the true meaning. 'When was the last time I had a friend outside of chat rooms?'

Ben could see that Fariq was sincere and it improved his mood. 'It's my first day and I've already made a friend.' He found hope for the future. 'That's right, this is the beginning of my wonderful future. I may have made many mistakes in the past, but I'm still young and have infinite possibilities ahead of me. Who's to say I can't accomplish great things?' It was the spring of his youth!

[29 days and 23 hours remaining until eradication]

'Oh my god, Debbie Downer is living in my head! I didn't need to hear that just now!'

[Would you like to turn off the hourly alarm?]

'It seems like the system also responds to thoughts. Yes, f*cking turn it off. It's not like I'll soon forget the approach of my impending death…' His mental ramblings were interrupted by the sound of a wild animal.

*Growl*

Ben looked down at his stomach and realized he hadn't eaten all day. He took the train in the morning, then was busy with registering and organizing his dorm room all day. Having already washed off the brown waste that covered him earlier, he decided it was a good time to go downstairs and try out the dorm cafeteria. It was getting late so he hoped it hadn't closed yet. Ben invited Fariq, who couldn't go because he had to contact his family and unpack. So Ben went alone.

As Ben passed through the halls, his face brightened up a little because someone had taken down the meme posters of him. 'I guess there are good people in the world.' He used the elevator to reach the ground floor and walked toward the cafeteria. As he passed the entrance, someone next to him yelled, "Hey, Burrito King!"

Ben looked over and found Tyler, one of the people who put up those posters of him everywhere. Ben's mood dropped like a stone again. He thought he'd left his dark past of bullying behind, but it didn't even take a day for people to push him down, burying him in the same lightless hole.

"You still taking orders?" Tyler and another student laughed in Ben's face as they got drinks from the vending machine.

Ben wanted to stand up for himself, but he wasn't a fighter. He made his stand once when he was younger. That's when he learned how much crueler reality was than the movies. The only result of his bravery was a beating from a bully that put him in bed for two weeks. Since then, he always kept his head down, having understood that walking in shame was better than lying down in it.

As Ben prepared to walk away, he caught a powerful scent of floral perfume exuding from behind him. When he turned around, it only took an instant, but what he saw mesmerized him.

Standing there was a gorgeous girl. She had an exotic Mediterranean face like a femme fatale from a James Bond movie. Olive skin complimented her neck-length dark hair, which waved when she moved like ocean currents under dim moonlight. She was talking on the phone and hadn't noticed Ben drooling yet.

Ben gulped. 'What a beauty...'

*Sneer* "Don't even dream about it, you scrub," Tyler said when he saw Ben gazing at the girl, lost in a trance.

Ben clenched his fists, shivering. 'I can't even daydream in peace?!?'

With heavy breathing, he took out the consumable Divine Pick Up Line from his pocket and stared at it for a long time...

Was this the moment? He hadn't seen such a beautiful girl since arriving in Manhattan, but this was his life he was playing with. Failure meant probable death. His heartbeat sped up as he grasped the realization that this was the most important decision he'd ever made. One chance. That's all he had.

'Should I use it now?'

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