Sitting in class. Daydreaming about what I'm going to do once I get out of this hell-hole. [0945]  Damn it's still too early. Where is the teacher? It's a substitute, but still. Doesn't mean he needs to be late. Ugh what a drag. "Ay Tamojikato! You're daydreamin again dude. Are you alright?" That voice. Valiant Tinnesz. A tall, dark grey-haired moron with light green eyes. My best friend. Captain of the football team. A popular kid. How he and I became best friends still remains a mystery to me. "Oh hey Val. I'm just trying to escape this dreadful place. Honestly, it's energy draining." [yawns and looks out the window]  "Just look at those pink blossoms. It's almost spring holiday." [I smirk] "Hell, yea dude! Babes and beaches! Oh, I almost forgot. I have to go and see the coach. He wanted to see me for some reason. Check ya later dude and don't flutter off again" [runs off within a few seconds] "That moron is something else." I muttered under my breath. Not even a full minute had passed. "Tamojikato, got a second?" The voice of an angel. I know that voice all too well. Mira Makani. A girl with a model-like body. Black hair and perfect blue eyes. She can make any guy do whatever she desires. I'm fortunate enough to be one of her friends. "Hey, yeah I do. What's up?" [she giggles] "As cold as ever, hmm? Anyway. I wanted to know if you wanted to stop by my house after school. I have some important things to discuss." Uh, I wonder what she wants to talk about. "Sure thing. We can walk together after school." Man, I wonder what she wants to talk about. Honestly, what a drag.

"Okay students, settle down. Take your seats and keep your mouths shut or else..." The words dissolve away. Is that a female? [looks in the new substitute's teacher's way]  IT IS! "My name is Lumi Bren. I'll be your home room teacher for the rest of the semester. Listen up kiddos. I may be a female but I won't take any of your absurdity. Understood? Excellent. When I call your name, just say present." Okay, you can clearly see she was raised by a military father or mother or even both. Don't want to get on her bad side. Not that I even have the strength for that. "Tamojikato Black." She said it with such disgust. "Present." The hell could be her issue? "Ah you're the number one student, isn't that right?" The boardroom must've showed her the top students. "I deem so yes." She is dredging more into this. I don't like it. Just agitates me. "Please come see me after school. I have a specific topic I want to talk about." Why the hell does everyone want to talk to me all of a sudden?! Well, I have to tell her I can't do it, since I already have plans with Mira. "Sorry ma'am but I can't make it after school. I have already acquired critical matters to attend to. If it's not life threatening, then we can handle it tomorrow and if you are impatient. I'll give you my number."

She probably thinks I'm being disrespectful. Well, I am just being straight forward and it needs to be normalised so that students speak honestly. There is a difference between being honest, straight forward and being disrespectful and ignorant. 'Adults' as we know them, need to learn and understand that. "Straight forward and you said it without any empathy. I like it. Give me your number. The matter is rather crucial but not life threatening as you said." Well shit. That took an unexpected turn. I think I must just get to admire her. Not in the way you are thinking, freak. I simply don't like anyone romantically. It's a waste of energy and valuable time. Feeling all these emotions for someone, getting attached is a bad thing. It makes you vulnerable and soft. Meaning you're an easy mark and you can get manipulated. After school, I head to Mira's house. I really wonder what she wants to talk about. I arrived at her house and rang the doorbell. I hear her voice from inside screaming "I'll be right there!" She opens up the door. She's wearing her school shirt but the top button is unbuttoned. I only realise now how short her skirt really is. Usually she wears high rise socks that hide her legs, but it seems like she has already taken them off. Hey I know I'm Aromantic and Asexual but I can still appreciate a good looking girl.

"Tamojikato." She jumps into my arms and gives me a tight hug. "Erm- hey Mira." Honestly, physical touch makes me uncomfortable. I don't do hugs. If you're not my mum, or lying on your death bed, don't expect me to hug you. Just don't. "I'm pleased you're here." She turned around so quickly that her skirt was slightly lifted, it revealed even more than what was already being revealed. "Mm." I cleared my throat. "What did you want to talk about Mira, I don't have all day." I'm not lying either. I have a shit ton of studying to do. "Aw, don't be mean now. Meanie. Anyway. I want to discuss a few things with you." She lets go of me and guides me to the living room. she sits down and pats the couch next to her  This is going to take a while, but I do as I am told. "Firstly, I didn't like the way you looked at our new teacher."- Why does she even care how I look at people? Since when is she observant like this? -"Secondly, I think you are the dumbest smart person I know. How dense are you to not notice that I've fallen in love with you."- She what?! "I think I have something in my ears. Could you possibly repeat that." There is no way she just said that. [looks me straight in my eyes]  "I have fallen in love with you Tamo. I've been in love with you for a while now." [her cheeks slowly turn red]  She puts her hand on my leg and looks me in her eyes. I look down at her lips and I can tell that she's moving in to kiss me. I've never jumped up that quickly in my entire life. "Um, I don't know what to say, but I think it's time I go." I grabbed my bag and practically ran out the door. How dense am I? How dense is she to not notice that I'm Aromantic?! Bloody idiot.

I've been running for the past 5 minutes. [breaths heavy] Man, I am unfit [exhales and inhales] Is she mad? Confessing like that? Why does she even like me? I just get sick by thinking of it. [takes out mobile from pocket] I need to call Val and meet up with him. This news left me in disgust and I want to make it someone else's problem. [dials up Val's number] Pick up Val. Jeez, you have a phone for a damn reason! "Ay what's up man? All good?" [looks up to the sky] "No, not all is good. I have news. Meet me at the coffee shop near our flats and don't make excuses. This is rather important. Be there at 1700." [dead silence for a bit] "Uh, sure man. I'll meet you down there." [ends call] He's going to be 5 minutes late. As perusal. I need to get home and take a shower. I smell worse than a dirty pig. All that from running. Honestly. I went home, cleaned up and met Val at 1705, just like I predicted. "What's up man?" He sits down at the table, he's wearing a black jumper and white Nike. I took a sip of my black coffee. "Right, so let's not waste any time. Mira told me she loved me." I try to drown my words with the coffee, but it doesn't work. "Wait - [he pauses for a second] - you mean to tell me that the hottest babe in school loves you?" He starts laughing but quickly wipes the smile off his face when he realises that I'm being honest. "Dude, do you even know what this means?" He grabs the biscuit from my plate. "Your spring holiday of 'babes and beaches' is going to be much better than mine with a babe like that by your side if you know what I mean." He chokes down the biscuit and makes a weird thrusting movement. "Yes you imbecile, I know what you mean. Unfortunately, I don't see Mira like that, or actually anyone for that matter." I took the last sip of my coffee.

He looks at me like I'm insane, but maybe I am. I mean loads of guys would die to be with Mira, but honestly I don't care. "Since you're just going to sit there and say nothing helpful, I'll leave. See you tomorrow Val." I stood up and left a note on the table to pay for my coffee and headed home. I don't have time for Val and his sex jokes. Even if I did feel something that's no way to talk about a woman or anyone for that matter. I swear all people want these days is sex. I'd rather not be used, so I'll rather stay alone. My company is the best kind of company anyway. I got home, turned on some music and made myself something to eat. Music is the only thing that helps me escape the thought running through my mind. [phone rings] Ugh who wants to talk to me now? [looks down on the phone] Oh it's Mira. What does she want, didn't I make myself clear when I basically ran for my life?! *[answers phone]"Hey Mira." There's no answer. "Hello?" I wait again for her reply. "Hey Tamo, sorry I'm calling. I just want to say I'm sorry for earlier. I know I made you uncomfortable and I don't want this to change anything between us." [call ends] Mm must be the signal. I slide my phone back into my pocket and finish my dinner. I must say I sometimes do find myself wondering if I'll ever feel something for someone, but to be honest, I don't know. I don't want to be alone for the rest of my life, but on the other hand, I don't want to be in a pointless relationship where I have no feelings whatsoever. Sometimes I wish I felt differently about love and even sex, but for now I don't want to waste my energy on something or someone. [checks watch]* Oh damn it's late. I should probably go to bed. I clean up the mess I made and retire to my bedroom. Tomorrow's going to be a lengthy day.

*alarm goes off*

Oh my lord. Why is this bloody thing so loud? I slam the stop button to prevent my alarm from waking up the entire neighbourhood. It feels like I got zero sleep in last night. [yawn] I walked over to my bathroom and took a quick shower. Hopefully that will wake me up a bit. I tied a towel around my body and walked over to the basin. [wipes steam off of the mirror] "What the hell?!" I fall backwards almost hitting my head on the corner of the bathtub. "Wait a damn minute" I stood up and looked up into the mirror once again, but the reflection that I saw was not me. My hair...it's black and my eyes are grey-ish. Maybe I did hit my freaking head in the shower and I'm in a coma in the back of an ambulance right now. [closes eyes tightly and opens them again] "Okay well that didn't work." *[hits wall with fist]"Ouch!" [internal crying]* Okay this is definitely not a dream. I look at my reflection once more. I pull my face and touch my hair to make sure once again that it's real. Oh nope. Nah-uh. I don't know what demonic bullshit this is but I honestly don't have the time for this. I put on a Benny hat to cover my hair and grab the ugliest pair of sunglasses I own. Honestly it's also the only ones I own. Before my mum passed she gave them to me because she saw it at some weird little shop I've never heard of and thought they would look perfect on me. They never did but it means a lot to me, so I still wear it once on a blue moon.

*a few minutes later*

I feel like a criminal in this outfit. I really hope no one wants to talk to me. I arrive at school and I already saw people staring at me. Of course they'll stare I look like a fucking suicide bomber. I walked to the over to home room. "Tamojikato can I speak to you for a moment?" Oh shit I forgot that she wanted to talk to me. I walk over to her desk she's quite small. That must sound rich coming from me since I'm 6 foot 3. "Yes Miss, what are the so called urgent matters you wanted to talk about?" I ask leaning over her desk. She's wearing strong perfume. I'm guessing. Nightingale. "Well I know that you are one of the students with the best marks and I can see you're truly academically driven- [more internal cries] I wish I was academic driven. I am just damn lucky all the time -"So I was wondering if I could sign you up for a helping hand job here at the school. You basically turn into an extra help teacher if I can put it very plainly. The school will pay you ¥200 per student. It's not a lot but at least you get something for your hard work, it will also look legitimately good on your records." She glides her glasses to the top of her nose and sits back in her chair. "Well Miss Bren, you had me at the ¥200 per student. I'm in."

Honestly the more money I make the more I can save up and move to Kyoto in two years. As soon as I'm done with high-school I'm out of this atrocious place. "Good will it be possible for you to start tomorrow?" She smiles and waits for my response. Do I have plans? Don't think so. Can't sit in my flat all day judging clowns. "I guess I could." I just hope I look like myself tomorrow and not the person I saw in the mirror an hour ago. Don't think they'll like it very much when they see a grey eyed, 6 foot 3 dude. [looks at the reader] Laugh you asshole. That was funny. *[looks back at Miss Bren]"Great, I think you'll enjoy it I know one of your friends are part of the program, so at least you'll have a friendly face." She stands up and welcomes all the students that just walked in. "Who is that if I may ask ma'am?" I damn hope it's not Val. "Mira, I believe you're friends,-Mira?! Noo! [falls onto his knees, crying internally like an idiot]*  She's worse than Val. -"but thank you Tamojikato, you may take your seat." She smiles once again. Why Mira? Really? Why is she just freaking everywhere? I walk to my seat with utter disgust and pain. I take my seat at the window like always. I look out the window. I love the cherry blossom trees. My mum used to take me to Nakameguro during spring time it's the best place in Tokyo to see the cherry blossom trees. "Hey Tamo." I hear a small shy voice. Dammit! It's Mira. "Oh hey Mira." She sits down next to me and pushes her hair behind her ear. Her face is all red again. "Mira Makani?" At least our conversation was rudely interrupted by the devil himself. Daisuke Takahasi, the head master. 5 foot 9. Smells like a pig. Blond hair and white teeth. She stands up, looks back at me and then goes with Mr. Takahashi to his office. What perfect timing he had indeed. I was not in the mood for that blundering conversation.

After a long day of hiding under my sunglasses and inside my jumper, I finally got to go home. I always have a shit ton of work to do because I never really do anything in class. I'm the only one to blame. [sigh]  If I actually did something I wouldn't be in this situation every day. How I manage to get good marks is still a mystery to me. As I walk home I'm already planning what I'm going to eat tonight. Lucky for me, I live very near to Himonyaasahiya. It's not the best restaurant, but it's cheap. I arrived at the restaurant, ordered my food and walked across the street to my flat. At least the place is mine. It might not be the most glamorous, richest place but it does me well. As I open the door I see my next door neighbour carrying in her groceries. "Hey Akina, can I help?" She's been around for a few months, she also lives alone. "Ah Tamo, you're a lifesaver." I head over to her and help her carry in her bags. Honestly I feel like she's the only person I can tolerate. She's just different. Akina means spring flower, and honestly I know why her parents named her that. She has light skin and pink cheeks with freckles all over her face. She has long dark hair that's always just draped around her like a blanket. She has a more masculine style compared to the other girls. She mostly wears graphic button downs with trainers, but I know underneath the baggy clothes she has a perfect body, just like Mira. "Thank you Tamo, I owe you one."- Her voice is very delicate. She probably sings nice as well. -"Come over tomorrow for dinner?" She giggles and packs the groceries into the fridge. "I'll have to see if I can make it. I have this stupid thing at school, but I'll let you know." I smile and help her pack the groceries. "Anyway my food is getting cold, I best be on my way, see you later Akina." I turn around and head back to my flat.

After dinner I clean up again and for the first time in a few hours I look at myself in the mirror. At least I look like myself again. Guess it must have happened at school, otherwise Akina wouldn't have been so chill. For a while before bed, I just glared out my bedroom window looking at the moon and stars. My mum used to sing the Edo no Komoriuta lullaby to me every night. I can't remember the lyrics, I can only remember the rhythm. My mum is the reason why I love music so much. She used to tell me that music can speak to the mind, heart and soul, and it truly does. Music is my escape from the demons in my closet. "I love you Okaasan." I know you're somewhere, watching over me. [falls asleep]  Ugh, why I'm feel like a helium balloon going up. [looks at the surroundings] Mm, I don't remember being in space. SPACE?! [moves around like a baby throwing a tantrum] Well that doesn't work. But why the hell am I in space anyway? Well, if I think logically. No human is capable of breathing in space. So I am dreaming. "So you figured it out, hey?" The voice, echoing through space. Goosebumps and a dead brain for a few seconds. "Uh, so who is speaking to me exactly?" I'm probably going insane if I dream about shit like this. "You're speaking to the god of dreams. Baku. I am your spirit guardian and protector." Well. He doesn't look like any animal that's on earth at least. He has the body of a bear, the head of an elephant, the eyes of a rhinoceros, the tail of an ox, and the legs of a tiger. He looks hideous and monstrous. But I have read in some Japanese book that Baku's are actually very good despite their monstrous looks. "I see. So why exactly are we talking? I mean, don't get me wrong. It's awesome to see and speak to the god of dreams, but I can't exactly wrap my head around why." [Baku laughs] "Well you see. I am here to warn you. There is an unknown entity roaming your city. It's full of hatred and rage. Once you encounter this unknown entity. You'll feel empty, depressed and suicidal. You will also see physical changes. Black-ish hair and your eyes will turn to a lighter colour than it is now. That is all I can say for now. Since you're already late for school." [he laughs at me]  I'M LATE?! AGAIN?! [wakes up] Dammit! [looks at alarm clock] it's 0810?! [soul leaves his body] I am 20 minutes late and I have that extra teacher thing going on!

I quickly got dressed and ran to school. I missed my first period at least I'm just in time for maths. [bell rings] Thank goodness. [breathes heavily] Why am I so unfit? I walked over to my table and sat down. Strange Mira isn't here today, I wonder what happened in Mr. Takahashi's office. Honestly I don't care, that means I can escape seeing her this afternoon at the extra classes. Today couldn't have gone any slower. Now I need to be here till 1600 before I can leave this hell hole. The first student asked for help with mathematics. At least it was year 10 maths because honestly I don't even understand what's going on with year 12 maths. One student after the other came. Mostly students from year 10, so it went quicker than I thought it would. I finished at exactly 1600. "Here you go Tamojikato." I get handed five ¥200 notes. "Thank you, Mr. Takahashi. I smile and stuff the money into my pocket. Before I got to exit the classroom I overheard a conversation between two other teachers in the hall. "Poor Mira, she's such a strong girl, and all of this in her final year." The teachers walked past the door. I wonder what Mira got herself into. I'll text Val when I'm home. Maybe he'll have some news.

I got home after a few minutes. "Oh shit! I completely forgot about dinner with Akina."**[knocks on door]  Akina opens the door, she's wearing a sundress. I have never seen her in a sundress since she moved here. "Hey Tamo." She smiles at me and steps aside, allowing me to enter her flat. "Well. I made it." I smiled. "Take a seat and I'll dish up for you." She takes out the food from the oven. It smells heavenly. She made Sukiyaki. I definitely need to get the recipe from her. She put down the pan of food and took a seat across from me. A few minutes later, I worked in two pans of Sukiyaki. I haven't eaten this nicely in a while. "Thank you for inviting me to dinner." I picked up her pan and mine and took it to the basin. "It's no problem Tamo, you're always welcome to join me." She smiles. Her wearing a sundress is really unusual for me. "Can I ask you a question?" She looks up and nods. "Why are you wearing a sundress? I mean I've never seen you in one so I'm just curious." She turns all red in her face. "Well- today is actually my birthday. I didn't want to be alone, so I invited you over." She puts her hair behind her ears. Its her damn birthday?! "Oh.. I'm sorry I didn't even know. If I knew I would've at least wished you a happy birthday." I don't really believe in birthdays. But since she made me such a nice dinner. It's the least I could say. [she stands up and walks towards me]  "It's fine. At least I got to spend my birthday with you."** Her entire face is blood-red right now.

Why? "Well I feel honoured that you wanted to spend your birthday with me." I just smiled. [she comes closer] "May I ask a small favour?" She looks at me with small puppy eyes. "Uh, sure." Okay, this is bloody nerve wrecking. "May I, give you a hug? Please?" The words barely came out of her mouth but I could hear what she said. For some reason, I emphasized her. I walk closer to her and warp my arms around her and I bring her closer to my chest. I can feel her heart beat. It's beating faster and faster. Why does this feel so comfortable? I feel so relaxed and comfy. I feel. Safe. "Can we stay like this for a little while, please?" With my eyes closed. I smiled. "Sure, we can stay like this for how ever long you want to." I can't see her smile, but I know for a fact she is smiling. "You're so warm Tamo. Like a big, cuddly teddy bear." [she giggles]  Well I am glad I can make her smile on her special day.

*phone rings*

"Sorry, I have to take this." [Val calling...]  "Val. So do you have any answers for me?" There is a pause for a few seconds. "Wassup dude? She's been missing since yesterday morning" That's weird. "Thanks Val." [call ends]  "Is everything okay? You look a bit concerned." I am a bit concerned. But I am not going to let that ruin the moment. "My friend wasn't at school today so I asked one of my friends to find out if she is okay. She's alright at least. Just some common flu." I lied but I had to. I can't worry Akina on her birthday. "Oh okay. Well, I am glad." She smiles brightly. "Let me quickly do the dishes then I will go. I am quite exhausted." After I washed the dishes with Akina, I hugged her for the last time. Waved goodbye and went home. I feel weird. My body is longing for something. Could it be Akina? Maybe it's her hugs I long for or maybe it's because my heart was running a damn marathon when she hugged me. Ugh I don't have the strength to figure out what my body wants. I went for a shower. I feed my fish and go off to bed. Wondering where Mira could be. I couldn't fall asleep, so I turned on the telly and it's automatically on the news channel. "Ugh why is this crap on?" I grab the remote to switch it to a different channel when I hear the news reporter's words. "The search for Mira Makani still continues. She was last seen wearing a white shirt and a blue, violet skirt on Tuesday morning outside Aozora on Himon-ya Koen-dori avenue." I can't believe what I'm hearing. I don't even know how to feel. I hope she's okay and that the police will find her. I switched off the telly. Drank some water and went to bed.

kilometres and kilometres away***

*a week later****

I don't know where I am. I've been here for a while. I'm tied down to a chair. It's dark and stuffy in here. It's been a week. I don't know the people that tied me down. I've never seen their faces. They sound foreign. Definitely not Japanese. [a light goes on]  Ouch my eyes. I got so used to the dark that the light burns my eyes. I looked down at my body. I'm covered in blood. I don't know if it's mine or not. "You ready for your final destination sweat heart?" A tall skinny man bends down and leans over me. He's wearing a black ski mask and a black suit. "Who are you?" I ask, struggling to get the words out. "Oh lovely Mira, you'll have to wait and see." He clicks his fingers and two big men appear out of the darkness with big guns. One of them walks to me and stops right in front of me. He has scars all over his face and he only has one eye. The other is blind. Bald and he has bad breath. He turns around the gun. "Night, night.." [he smirks at me] I can hear laughter in the background. He hits me with the back end of his gun and I black out.

"I never saw today coming. Its funny how the world can give you something that makes you feel alive and then, in the blink of an eye, it gets taken away. Your happiness is your lifeline. Everything that gives you a reason to wake up in the morning is just gone. Laying in a coffin next to you."

the present day

The next week was weird without Mira. I mean, she annoyed the shit out of me, but she was still an acquaintance. The police are still searching for her. Enough of that sad shit. So at least I made ¥3000 this week. Oh, and Akina and I are going on a date tomorrow. I don't even know how it happened. Don't ask me, it just happened. We've been spending so much time together and, in between laughing and hugging and watching anime, she asked me out on a date. I was so baffled I didn't know what to say. My mind wanted to say no, but somehow my heart wanted to say yes so much more. The the date has arrived. I'm so nervous and I don't even know why. It's like she put some spell on me, making me doubt everything I am. I'm not supposed to feel this way about her. Am I even really asexual and aromantic? Because with her I feel different. I feel butterflies in my stomach, and she gives me this weird warm feeling. Anyway, I need to get dressed. I grabbed my black jeans and put on a grey shirt. I styled my hair and made sure I smelled extra nice. [knock on the door] Oh shit! She's here. My heart started racing and I somehow forgot how to act like a normal person. I opened the door, revealing her. The spring flower in my life. She was wearing ripped blue jeans and a black blouse. She's wearing makeup, which is unusual, but she looks even more beautiful. "Hey Tamo." She pulls me in for a hug. She smells sweet. It gave me goose bumps to feel her in my arms again. "Hey Akina." I squeezed her and let go. "Are you ready to go? " She asks, taking my hand. They're so small compared to mine, and they are as cold as ice. All I could do at that moment was nod my head. She's made me speechless. I feel my body tensing up. I'm not used to feeling all of these feelings for one person. It feels like I'm on a roller coaster. Before I knew it we we're at the restaurant. We sat down and we both ordered coffee. I've never even seen half of the names of the different kinds of coffee you can get. "I'll take a cappuccino." She closes the menu and the waitress waits for me to place my order. "Erm - this one." I pointed at the coffee not knowing how to pronounce it. "The caffè macchiato?" the waitress asks. "Mm." I answer, I can feel my face getting red with embarrassment. What idiot doesn't know how to say caffè macchiato? Akina looks at me in awe, making me blush even more.

Within a few minutes our coffee arrived.

"Tamo, can I be honest?" I nod. "I really hate restaurants, can we just ditch this place and go somewhere else?" She starts laughing. "Please." I answered and raised my hand to ask for the bill. I'm so glad that she said something. I hate restaurants and malls for that matter. I would much rather just stay home and spend time there. "I have a place..." I whispered and took her small, soft hand into mine. After a few minutes, we arrived at our destination. My favourite place on earth is Nakameguro. The cherry blossoms are in full bloom. She looks at them in awe and the trees make her look even more beautiful to me. "This place is beautiful. I've been living in Tokyo for so long, and yet I have never been here." She squeezes my hand and looks at me. I feel my cheeks are turning red. While walking, I picked up a blossom from the ground and stopped. I pull her towards me, push her hair behind her ear and slide the flower into her hair. I smiled at her, and this time my smile was genuine. Usually I have to fake my smile, but with Akina I don't have to force or fake anything. She makes me feel safe. Like I'm home. We stood still in one of the trees. I pulled her into a hug, and slowly but surely I felt my face turn towards her and before I knew it, I felt her soft lips on mine. A few days ago, I wouldn't have even imagined myself kissing someone, but look at me now, smooching the most beautiful girl in the world under a cherry blossom tree. Akina is making me second guess everything I am. She makes me feel so many feelings, feelings I have never really felt before.

It feels good to feel something. I just hope she feels the same.

After a whole day of spending time with Akina, my heart felt excessive to say goodbye. I know we're next-door neighbours but I'm sure she doesn't want to spend a full 24 hours with me. We walked home and eventually got to her flat. She stood on her tipsy toes and pulled me into a tight hug. My heart started galloping again. She let's go. "Thank you, for the most amazing date I've ever been on [hesitation] actually the most amazing first date." She leans and kisses me. She opened the door and walked into her flat, but before she could completely enter it, I grabbed her wrist, pulling her back to me. I put my hand behind her head and kissed her one last time. I honestly don't know where I got those moves from, but it seemed like she enjoyed it because when I tried to pull away she pulled me back in to her soft kisses. After a ten-minute make-out session, I let her go into her flat and I walked over to mine. I feel so eerie. I don't feel like myself. I sat down on the bed questioning my whole life. Not only does Akina make me feel safe, but she makes me feel certain things  in the down town area, if you know what I mean. I need to get her out of my head. I took a cold shower and went straight to bed and tried to forget about the days events. I reminded myself yet again that falling in love is just a waste of time, but then my heart told me that with Akina it's time wasted well. [falls asleep]

alarm goes off

Bloody hell, I really need a new alarm. [bashes the stop button] I feel like a piece of trash again. I have a huge headache and for what reason? I stood up and took a brief shower. I made myself some toast and sat down in front of my telly and watched some anime. I wondered what Akina was up to and if she's thinking about yesterday. Honestly, I can't get her out of my head. I think I should just drown out the thoughts with music. [turns on music] I sat on my couch and tried to let the music do it's job, but not even the music could get her out of my head. [phone rings] Mm? Who could be calling me this damn early in the morning? [looks down] Lord, it's Val. [picks up the phone and answers] "Hey Val what's up?" I can hear intense commutation in the background. "Oh nothing much dude, I just heard on the news that they have a lead in Mira's case. Apparently she's somewhere near or in Mexico." [silence] Mexico, What do they wanna do with her in Mexico? "Thanks for letting me know Val, hopefully they'll find her soon." *[doorbell rings]"Got to go Val, someone's at my door." [hangs up] I wonder who it could be, ringing my damn doorbell at like 0800 in the morning. To my surprise, it was not who I hoped it would be but only the landlord who came to check up on the flat. "Oh, hey Mr. Hideyoshi." I opened the door to the small little man in blue scrubs. "Problems with the plumbing?" He walks looking around. "Eh, no sir." He looked at me. "Lights?" He flickers the switches. "No sir, no problems here." He walks past me, and he smells like sweat and noodles. "Well then, nothing to check then." He walked out without saying goodbye. Rude. Why are most old, short people so damn rude? [closes the door] Maybe I need to go to the gym for a bit. [sighs]* Okay but before I go, I need to take a shit. My stomach feels like a volcano that's about to explode.

15 minutes later

Ah, heaven on the toilet seat. [smiles] Anyway, gym clothes and then off to the gym. The birds are really making a loud noise today. [looking up at the tree] I wonder what they could be doing? Eh, it doesn't matter. I need to go to the gym anyway. [Looks down on watch] 0845 huh? Well, a 2-hour gym session is just what this man needs. [smirks] The gym is only a few minutes away from me. Thank the Lord it's within walking distance. Otherwise I'd be dead. "Sup dude you have a gym membership card?" A short, curly hair, fat man behind the counter asked. He is chewing gum. It's the most disgusting way almost like he's cuddling it .The guy is a mess and a bloody disappointment. "I do." [shows membership card] "I see, thank you sir. Enjoy your workout session." Why does he have to chew with his damn mouth open? [glares at him]  "Can you please, for the love of our almighty God? CHEW WITH YOUR DAMN MOUTH CLOSED?!" [Looks at Tamo with big eyes] "My bad, sorry sir." [chews with mouth closed] "Thank you." That 'thank you' was very sarcastic if you couldn't read between the lines. [1 hour in] Man [huffs and puffs] who knows that [more huffs and puffs] working out really takes a toll on your body? [groans] Ugh, all this is just because I don't want to be unfit. "Hey there sexy." [looks around] Huh? Where did that voice come from? "Over here you idiot!" Where? [looks at his right] Ah. Akane Tanaka. The high-school's second best student. She's usually mad at me for taking first place, but for some reason, she's always friendly to me. "Oh hey Tanaka. Didn't see you there." Her face turned all red. "Of course you didn't see me. You're always such a big meanie!" A big meanie? Where the hell am I being mean to here? "Well I don't see why you call me mean. I didn't do anything wrong." [Tanaka looks at Toma with disgust] "Never mind that. Since when do you go to the gym? It's very odd to see you here." Do I always go to the gym? Maybe not with weight, but I do with my own weight. Lord, these people do have a tendency to make me mad.

"Well, I am trying something new. Do you like it Tanaka?" She's not even making eye contact with me now. Is she shy? She never acts like this around me in school. "I, uh. Yeah I guess I like it. Seeing you do something new." Why is she like this? It's creeping me out. "Well, I am glad, but if you can excuse me, I have to finish my workout." I only have an hour left anyway. "Okay sure. But can I talk to you after you are done?" Why the hell does she want to talk to me? "Uh, sure if you want to. I only have an hour left, so if you don't want to wait, you can just text me." The hell did I say that for? "I don't have your number." Her face is beyond red now. *[looks up towards Tamo]"May I have your number then?" Did she just point-blank ask me for my number? Since when did girls of today have the guts of steel to ask me shit like this? "Sure, but just don't spam me with text messages and calls please." After another hour of suffering, I sat down and put on my sweatshirt. I looked down at my watch to see my stats for the workout. I burned 950 calories. Not too shabby if I say so myself. I looked up and see started walking towards the exit. "Well, I won't take up a lot of you time." She walks with me but struggles to keep up with me. "I wanted to ask you if you could tutor me." I stopped dead in my tracks. She wants me to tutor her? "I mean I know you're busy with those extra help classes, and I was just wondering if you'll tutor me." She looks up and her face turns red once again. I turned around to face her. "And why exactly do you need my help? You're the second smartest student in our school, you don't need any help." Something is a bit off here. "Well." [pause]* Just when I thought her face wouldn't turn any redder it did. I think by now she could be classified as a tomato. "I don't know how else to ask you to spend time with you." She looks down and tries to hide her face. Since when do all the girls just fall at my feet. First Mira, then Akina, now Tanaka! I can't deal with this right now. I'm way too tired of this bullshit. "Listen Tanaka, I'll help you, but I'm not interested in anything else. I will come tomorrow for extra help but don't waste my time." I turned around, walked out of the gym and went straight home. Akina is still running around in my mind. Maybe I should just go to her after my shower and ask her if she wants to have lunch or maybe a milkshake.

a few minutes later

Ah, that shower felt so good. I dried off my hair and body and got dressed. I put on a red shirt and a pair of black sweats. I styled my hair and put on my trainers. "I low-key feel like super man in this shirt." [looks at the reader] "and yes, I know super man's suit is blue, I'm not an idiot. I just feel super, leave a man be." Anyway, I need to see if Akina is home. I walked out to the balcony in the back and leaned over the edge to see if there's any movement in her flat. I can hear her music playing, which means she's home. I practically ran out of my flat like a fat child running towards an ice cream truck. I locked my door and headed over to Akina's place. I knocked at the door. She opened it. Her hair is in a messy bun, and she's wearing a pinkish tank top and grey sweats with pink bunny slippers. "Oh hey Tamo." She smiles and pulls me into a hug. "Hey Akina, what smells so delicious?" She lets go and steps aside, allowing me to enter her flat. "I made Gyoza." Her cooking always makes my mouth water. "I was actually just on my way to ask you if you wanted to join me for lunch." She smiles and takes the food from the microwave. "It smells heavenly, I really need to get these recipes from you Akina. All I've been eating is ramen because, honestly, it's the only thing I can make." I smile and lean over the counter. "Well, Tamo, like I said before, you're always welcome to join me. Maybe one day you can show me how to make ramen." She giggles and bends down to get plates from the cupboard. I really wish she didn't do that. All I can see now is her *** in the air. Even though she's wearing sweatpants, I can still see the outline of her ***. I looked away as quickly as possible to stop myself from getting too excited. She stands up and dishes up the Gyoza. She puts down the plate in front of me and joins me at the table. For some reason, I'm more focused on her than the food, which is odd because nothing beats food. She just looks so soft. It's like her skin is shimmering, like her body is calling my name. "Tamo?" She snaps her fingers and pulls me out of my dream world. "Sorry." I smile and take a big bite of the food in front of me, trying to not think inappropriately about her.

After lunch, I helped Akina clean up. She's so beautiful. She looks like Harionago, only not that scary and dangerous. She just has the beauty and her body. I swear it was sculpted and built by hand. There's no flaws whatsoever. I feel like every time I'm with her, I fall deeper and deeper in love with her. She walks towards me and pulls me down into her lips by pulling my shirt. Her lips taste like peaches and I'm dying for more. She started pulling my shirt up. She stops kissing me and looks at my body. "Oh damn." She pulls me into a kiss once more. She starts pulling on my trousers, pulling them down and resting her hand on me. It feels so good to be touched, but it feels so wrong. I placed my hand on her ******, squeezing it. [She breathes harder] Her kisses get more intense and more passionate. She slipped her hand underneath my pants. Her hands are so cold, but I love it. Her hands start moving up and down. She bites my bottom lip and leads me to the bedroom. I slowly revealed her body. She has a tattoo under her breasts. It makes her even more sexy. I laid her down on the bed and pulled down her trousers and her pants. I laid down and pulled her legs over my shoulders. I kissed her inner thighs working my way up to her. She tastes good. I mean she's the first person I've ever done something with. She feels good, and she made me feel something I've never really experienced before.

After 45 minutes, I laid down next to Akina. My heart is beating so fast. Did I, an asexual just have sex?! Okay now I know I've been lying to myself about the things I want and don't want. I think all I want now is Akina. All of her. She stood up and walked over to her bathroom. She has such an amazing body. She looked at herself in the mirror .She let down her hair it fell down and covered her *** and her breasts. She turns back to me and walks over to the bed. She curls up into my arms and I can feel her breasts on my chest. "Hey Akina?" I stoke her hair. "Mm?" She sits up and looks at me. "What does this tattoo mean?" I touch her soft skin where the tattoo lays. "Well, the flowers are cherry blossoms they were my mom's favourite, that's why she called me Akina. As you may know, cherry blossoms show love and beauty and the passing of time. It's a reminder of transience. To basically live everyday, like it's your last." She points at the flowers and lays them back down. I could see how her face changed when she spoke about her mom. I feel kind of bad for asking. I didn't mean to ruin the mood. For a few minutes, I just lay there listening to her breathing and eventually I fell asleep. I am walking down a weird ally way. It's cold and the wind is slightly breezing through the air. [sniffs] It smells like dead animals. [walks further down the ally way] The smell of dead animals is getting stronger now. "You are crossing the line boy. Be careful who you play with." [looks around] Where could this voice be coming from? [screams from a distance becomes louder] "You are being controlled boy. You are not who you think you are. [crow lands] We are Morrigan, Badb, and Macha. The Crow Goddess. We are here to warn you about what Baku did. Be careful who you surround yourself with." The crow's eyes start to bleed and the screaming gets louder. The crow started flying towards me. I run as fast as I can. My breathing gets louder, shorter and colder. [trips] I can't move. My body feels like it's frozen. The crow is getting even closer. The claws grabbed my face and tore my head off my body.

"Tamo, Tamo! Wake up!" I feel how my body is shaken, but for some reason I can't open my eyes. [cold water hits his face] "Ah it's bloody cold!" Akina hands me a towel. "Sorry, but I did try and wake you up normally."**[wipes face with a towel] "Was I screaming or doing anything weird?" She must've woken me up for some reason. "No, you were just sweating a lot and sort of mumbling. It made me a little concerned." She is smiling. "I'm a bit thirsty." I smiled and went to the kitchen. Why the hell do all of these gods and goddesses from different places appear in my dreams? All of them come with warnings about the same thing. "Be careful who you surround yourself with". My identity isn't what I think it is? [shaking head] Man, all of this is too weird to me. "Are you okay?" Where can I find the answers to all of this? "Yeah I'm fine. But it's late, so I'll just go home."* I smiled [looking my at watch]* So its 0345 huh? It really is late. I hug Akina and went to my flat. I went straight for the shower.  In the shower, I kept thinking about the warnings. Who or what are they warning me about? And why all of a sudden do all of these gods and goddesses approach me in my dreams? Is it really them, or is it just some messed up dream that my mind creates? I honestly don't know. I don't feel like going to school today. I'm way too exhausted and to be honest I don't want to look at all the people's stupid faces. It's just gonna make me more annoyed than I already am. I wish I could ask someone for help, but how do you just tell someone that you have dreams where gods warn you about the people in your life? I mean, I have had my fair share of weird dreams, but this is a new level of crazy. I think I should head to the gym again. While I'm there, my mind is clear. That's all I need. A few hours of peace and quiet in my mind, without Akina or the gods bothering me. I got dressed and walked to the gym.

Somewhere in Mexico earlier that day

"Policia Federal, open up!" [bangs on the back door] The police slams through the back door of the restaurant. The scene they walk in on is terrifying. Mira Makani, the missing 17-year-old from Japan, has been found. She's laying on a steel kitchen table. Her body is cut up into little pieces and her organs are hanging on the outside of her body. They are draped like red curtains. Her body is blue, which means she has been dead for a while. The police found traces of drugs in her organs. They must've used her to smuggle drugs across the borders. Poor girl. She was so young, she had her whole life waiting for her. The police put her mangled body into a black body bag and wheeled her out to the ambulance.

I got to the gym within a few minutes. I put my earphones in and listened to some music to get myself hyped up for a 2-hour training session. I started with a 40-minute run on the treadmill. I looked up at the telly and saw that the news channel was on. On the screen I read ‘Mira Makani found’. I slammed the stop button on the treadmill and ran over to the telly. I took out my earphones to pay attention to what they were saying. “17-year-old Mira Mikani was found dead this morning by the police. Mira went missing about four weeks ago. Search parties have been looking ever since.” I can’t believe what I’m hearing. I saw the body bag being dragged out of a restaurant. I feel sick. I think my mind knew all along that Mira wouldn’t survive, but I think some part of me hoped she would still be alive. “Our condolences to family and friends during this time.” The news reporter finished. I ran out of the gym straight home. Everything is way too overwhelming. I had sex, then gods appeared in my dream and now I find out that one of my acquaintances got murdered? What is my life even at this moment? I got home and I saw Akina in the hallway. “Hey Tamo.” She walked towards me, but before she could get to me, I entered my flat and locked the door. It feels like my head is going to explode. I heard a ringing sound as I fell onto the ground. It stings. [screams] “What is happening?!” My whole body starts to tense up and it feels like I’m not in control of my emotions. When everything came to an end and the ringing in my head stopped, my doorbell rang. “Go away Akina.” I scream, still laying on the floor. “It’s not Akina.” Wait that voice. I jumped up and opened the door. “M-mira.” I gasped. “We need to talk.” She pushes me into the flat and closes the door.

The day was gloomy.

Everyone was crying and I too felt remorse that I acted so foolish, but

how was I supposed to know? How was I supposed to know that this would

happen? The rain started to fall on my black suit. It made the day even

more lachrymose. I saw the ground in black opening umbrellas while the

coffin was being lowered into the ground. A fresh grave, the ground

perfectly placed on top. The rain is getting heavier and I head inside

to the church where everyone is crying and eating finger foods. I guess

it's usual to eat food and cry at funerals. I don't know, I've never

been to one.

the present day

"Look Tamo, I know it might come as a shock to you that I'm..." [pause] "Mira you're, alive!" I jump up from the ground and grab her into my arms. Who knew that I would miss her so much. "Yeah, yeah. I need your help." She pushes me away and sits down on the couch. "Help? With what?" I ask and sit down next to her. "Well ..." she stands up and stands right in front of me. "Don't freak out."

Why is she saying that? Why was I freaked out? Before I could even

finish that thought I saw it. Wings... Wings that drape down to the

floor. They're a white beige colour. I can't even comprehend what I'm

seeing. "What the-" [Tamo passes out]

*A few minutes later*

"Wake up you moron" she shouts and slaps me in my face. "Ouch! Why did you do that." [rubs tender face] "Tamo

I don't have all damn day. The gods helped me. They told me to come to

you. For what reason, I still don't know. All I know is that you have to

help me stay off of the grid, for obvious reasons." The room went quiet for a few seconds. "Mira-" [pause] "What?!" She looks over at me with a death stare. "You, you have wings..."

the words barely left my mouth but before I could say anything further

she grabbed me by my shirt and lifted me off the ground. [looks at reader] "Now imagine this a 5 foot 2 girl picking up a man that's 6 foot 3, insane right?" Anyway, back to the story. "Yes I have wings you imbecile." She rolls her eyes at me and I am honestly amazed by her strength. "Look

Tamo, I know this is a lot to take in but it's not every day you get to

see yourself get killed and then revived by a goddess and then the top

of that being approached by more gods that give you orders to stay off

the grid and to come to you." She gets a glass of water and swallows the contents angrily "O-okay."

that's the only thing I can say at that moment. I have seen the gods in

my dreams but now I have a literal archangel being in my living room. "Good, I will only have to stay here for a while, hopefully, you won't have any guests. "She waves her hand and suddenly the door flies open. "Be a dear and get my bags." The angle of the wind. She's an angel of wind! I did what she asked because honestly, I don't want to get on her bad side.

Once the day was over

and I got used to the fact that my former acquaintance that died had

turned into an angel, I took a shower and went to bed. I wonder if Mira

sleeps, I mean is she alive? or is she dead. I mean she looks alive but I

don't know how magical creatures work. For now, she classifies as half

dead half alive. Almost like a zombie. I need to go to bed. I have

school tomorrow and then I have to act all sad that Mira passed when

meanwhile she's sitting eating soup dumplings on my couch watching

anime. [yawns and falls asleep] "We warned you...We warned you about the people in your life, but you wouldn't listen." The air gets all foggy, the ground begins to fill with water. "HEY! What's happening?!"

Before I knew it my head was under the water and then I saw her. a

Lady, under the water. She made the water around her a glowing blue

colour. She had long black hair that floated behind her. She looked like

a normal person. She didn't have fangs or claws, wings or a tail. She

looked normal. "I am Tethys, the goddess of freshwater." She stops right in front of me. Her eyes are glowing. "How

many times do we have to approach you for you to realise that you are

in danger. Stay away, stay far away. Otherwise, the nightmare will

continue." In the blink of an eye, the water disappeared and I woke up. [alarm goes off] Before I can turn off the alarm it flies off the table. I look up and see Mira standing in the kitchen. "What an awful noise."

She lowers her hand and continues making coffee. I look onto the ground

and see my alarm clock smashed into tiny little pieces. "Oh well, I wanted to buy a new one anyway." I stood up made coffee and got dressed for school.

A few minutes later I

arrived at school. As I predicted everyone is sad and crying because

Mira is 'dead'. I wanted to scream at the top of my lungs: "SHE'S ALIVE!"

but I knew if I did that she would probably murder me. After the first

few periods, it's finally break. I went to the school library and did

some research on the gods and goddesses the approach me in my dreams.

Strangely, they all have different origins and they all look different. I

can't figure out who they are warning me about. I already know many

people hate me so the list of people they could be warning me about is

quite long actually. [Bell rings] "Ugh, it feels like the break was three minutes long."

I logged out of the computer and thanked the sweet old Mrs Aimi for

letting me eat my lunch in the library. After the whole day, I headed

home. As I got to my front door I saw Akina. I don't have the energy to

talk to her right now. "Hey Tamo." She kisses me. "Hey Akina." I greet back very uninterested. "I haven't seen you since, well since we had sex." Her face turns all red and she looks down to the ground. "Did I do something wrong?"

she asks and looks up at me with her light eyes. It's strange. I never

realised that her eyes had a slight shimmer in them. It's so beautiful. I

just love looking at her. "No not at all." I smile. "Oh good, do you want to join me for dinner?" She looks up at me once again and I just can't say no to her when she looks at me like that. "Sure, what did you make tonight?"

Turns out nothing was

actually on the menu. We entered her flat and she immediately pushed me

down to the wall and kissed me. She placed my hand on her ****** and her

hand on me. She unzipped my school trousers and slipped her hand into

my pants. She knew what she was doing, but I loved it. She went down

onto her knees and pulled everything down. Her hands are cold again.

Before she began she looked up at me, and then she started. It felt so

good. She is skilled. I never imagined my neighbour being like this.

When she finished she moved up and kissed my lips. She moved over her

pants to the side and slipped it in. I can never get enough of this

feeling. Seeing her facial expressions. I love to see how much she loves

it. She makes me feel, alive. She feeds the lust that runs around in

me. The thirst for her body can never be satisfied. I carried her to her

bed. I laid down on my back, allowing her to be on top. I grabbed her

thighs and then her hips moving them with mine. She gives me so much

pleasure. I turned her around and stood up from the bed. She was on all

fours, arching her back. I grabbed her hair and pulled her up to me

while thrusting in her. She liked it rough, well I'm assuming she does

because she's making much more noise than she did last time.

After everything was

done, I got dressed while she was still laying on her bed. She looks

like a goddess with that body of hers. She's like Aphrodite, the goddess

of sex. I don't even know why I'm comparing her to a goddess, probably

because they haunt me in my dreams. I took one last look at her and for

some reason, her eyes had a yellowish glow to them. It must be the light

from the bedside table shining in her eyes. She smiled at me as I

walked out. She always has her ways to make me fall in love with her all

over again. [stomach growls] Okay but I am hungry. Hopefully,

Mira didn't eat all the soup dumplings I bought yesterday. I opened the

door and there she was. Standing with her back to the door. Her wings

are out, they are so long that they are dragging on the floor. They are

mesmerising. I just want to touch them. I walked closer holding my hand

out to it, she still hasn't realised that I'm there. I finally got close

enough and I gently rested my hand on one of the wings. I couldn't even

take in how soft it is properly when I went flying across the room. "What do you think you're doing!"

she shouts and walks over to me laying on the ground. She pulled back

her wings and bent down to look at my face to face. Her eyes turned a

bright red colour. I grab my head and look at my hand, it's bleeding.

She looked down and saw the blood and suddenly her eyes turned back to

their normal colour. "Oh my lord, Tamo. I'm so sorry!" she looks

at my head and quickly ran to get the emergency kit from the bathroom.

She treated my wounds and warmed up some soup dumplings.

"I'm sorry Tamo. I don't know what went through my mind. I thought you were...well someone else." She sat down and fed me one of the dumplings. "It's okay Mira, I shouldn't have touched them without asking." I smile and touch my head softly. "You could've asked me to touch them Tamo." She opened up her wings and nods at me. I lifted my hand and rested it on her wing once again. I stroked it gently. "They are amazing Mira." Her face turns red and flashes a shy smile. "Thank you." She fed me another dumpling and pulled back her wings. "How did this even happen?" I swallowed the last bit of the dumpling that I had in my cheek. "What do you mean?" She asks putting down the bowl on the table. "I mean, how did you turn into an angel ?" I sat up slowly waiting for her to answer me. "Tamo

I think this is a conversation we should have when you don't have a

wound the size of the grand canyon on the side of your head." She stands up and picks me up from the couch and carries me to my bed. "I don't like you being able to pick me up." I cross my arms while she tucks me into bed. "Mhmm."

She smiles, kisses me on my forehead and walks out of the room. My head

is killing me. I guess this is what my life has become now. I need to

make a list of things I can and can't do, to prevent me from flying from

one side to the other in my flat. [falls asleep]

The next few weeks were bland as hell.

It was like I had the

same say over and over again. I went to school, did the extra help

classes, came home, had sex with Akina and went home to Mira. I'm kind

of sick of my life right now. It feels like my life is a record player

that keeps getting stuck at the same place. Sex with Akina was great but

I feel like she uses me for my body, and I feel so much for her. Being

able to have sex with her is just a bonus. I just feel like she doesn't

feel love for me, but only lust. We found a secure place for Mira in the

meantime. Santorini, Greece. It will give her a chance to begin her new

life and to get out of my flat. I can't deal with her eating all my

soup dumplings anymore. She's leaving in two days. I must admit that I

will miss having a roommate even though she ate all the food and trashed

the whole flat when she opened her wings. I'm on school holiday,

starting tomorrow, but I'm not at school today so I'm basically on

holiday already. Now I can catch up with my anime, sleep till noon and

the best of all is that I don't have to look at all the stupid faces at

school for a few weeks. Just like Mira, I'm going to be off the grid. I

don't want anyone or anything to bother me, not even Akina. For now, I

can just sit on my balcony and listen to music and drink coffee. I can

even use this time to look at the people in my life to figure out who

the gods are warning me about. The last few days with Mira was kind of

fun. We mostly just watched anime and ate dumplings, noodles and all

kinds of food. It was fun not being alone all the time. Akina showed up

at my door a few times, I didn't acknowledge her. I don't feel like

wasting my time on her anymore. She uses me for sex and sex only. Don't

get me wrong, the sex is amazing, but I need more than just a ****

buddy. I need someone that will feed me chicken soup in bed when I'm

sick, not someone just interested in jumping my bones.

Anyway, Mira is leaving

today. I'm kind of sad but I will never admit it out loud. She packed

all her things and got all her fake documents to start her new life. I

walked her out of my flat, hugged her and just before we got to say

goodbye the door next to us opened, it's Akina, coming out of her flat

probably on her way to jump me again. Mira looks at Akina and suddenly

her eyes turned bright red, almost like the night when she sent me

flying across the room. "You foul creature!" Mira raises her and sends Akina flying to the end of the hallway. "Mira! What are you doing?!" I rush over to Akina to see if she's okay. "Oh

Tamo you've been fooled all this time. This, this is the girl you've

been talking about? Well you see, I see her true form. I see her for the

demon she is." She walks over to Akina and me. "What do you mean? What do you mean her true form?" I can feel my grip getting tighter and tighter around Akina's arm. "Dear old Akina here is a succubus." Mira's eyes are turning redder by the minute. "A succubus?" I ask trying to understand what Mira is saying. "Lord Tamo open a book, will you! Akina is a demon that seduced you for her pleasure a.k.a a succubus." I look at Akina with tears in my eyes. I don't know if it's the anger or the disappointment that's making me tear up. "You used me?" I push Akina up to the wall. "Answer me!" my grip around her throat tightens. [Akina laughs] "Oh poor you, you thought I cared about you? Well, jokes on you. Who could ever love someone like you?"

She laughs. Out of pure shock, I loosened my grip. Akina falls to the

ground and tries to get her breathing under control. She looks up at me

and I see her eyes turning yellow. Her smile that was once so soft and

sweet turns into fangs, and finally, she reveals her true form. Big

black wings that are ripped appeared from behind her. She stands up and

faces me. She grabs my face and stares into my eyes. "I wish I could get one last taste."

She pushes her tongue into my mouth I swear I can feel it going down my

throat. She pulls away. She licks her lips and tries to walk away but

Mira pushes her back onto the wall. "What are you going to do huh?" [Akina laughs] "Angels can't kill anyone." Mira lets go of Akina and her eyes go back to their normal colour. "You're right, she can't kill you, but I'm not an angel." I feel my hands burning as the anger in me takes over. I see Mira and Akina looking at me like I'm some kind of monster. "Tamo."

I hear Mira's voice. I look up from my hands and I catch a glimpse of

my reflection in the window. I look like a monster. Somehow without

noticing two horns came out on the side of my head. They are black and

slightly twisted. I look down at my hands again, I saw something quite

peculiar. I look back at the fear in Akina's eyes. "The devil is alive sweetheart."

I grin and flick my hand towards her. In the blink of an eye, she

caught fire. Her wings ripped and fell down onto the floor. Her

terrified screams made me feel so much joy, but before Akina could burn

to death Mira put out the fire. Akina fell onto the ground in pain. "Tamo you can't kill her here." Mira bends down to see if Akina is still alive. "I have a plan."

I smiled and picked Akina up from the ground. I burst through her flat

door placed her on the kitchen chair and held her face in my hand. Her

eyes are still glowing. "Please..." she muttered. "See you in hell bitch." I turned around and put her flat on fire. An accidental fire, how unfortunate. [Tamo laughs]

Within a few minutes the

fire department arrived and put out the fire, but it was already too

late. Akina's body was burnt to a crisp. Just like the spring flower in

winter Akina died. The ambulance took her remains away while the police

and fire department investigated this mysterious fire. I was so

carefully placed to make sure there was no suspicion around me. I

arrived a few minutes after the ambulance left in tears running towards

the police begging them for answers about my so-called girlfriend. I

must say that my acting skills are on point. They didn't suspect a

thing, "I was out buying groceries officer." What a pathetic yet believable lie. "Well, Mr Black we are sorry for your loss." The officer handed me a funeral company's card. "Contact them if you need any help." He pats me on the shoulder, put on his hat and left the scene. I looked down at the card. I smiled, "Perfect."

A few weeks later

The day was gloomy.

Everyone was crying and I too felt remorse that these people lost

someone they loved. I too loved Akina, but that was fake. "I never

saw today coming. It's funny how the world can give you something that

makes you feel alive and then in the blink of an eye it gets taken away.

Your happiness, your lifeline. Everything that gave you a reason to

wake up in the morning, just gone. Laying in a coffin next to you." I

look at all the people in the church crying. I should pat myself on the

back for my acting skills. Of course, I planned the whole funeral and

put up my best show. I don't want anything about Akina's death to point

to me. We left the church and went to the graveyard outside. The rain

started to fall onto my black suit. It made the day even more

lachrymose. I saw the crowd in black opening umbrellas while the coffin

was being lowered into the ground. a fresh grave, the ground perfectly

placed on top. The rain is getting heavier and I head inside to the

church where everyone was crying and eating finger foods. I guess it's

usual to eat food and cry at funerals. I don't know, I've never been to

one. After the coffin is lowered into the grave there's an 'after party'

if I can put it like that where you celebrate the loved one's life by

eating and crying. I didn't cry real tears. I don't feel bad at all

honestly. If I could I would keep her crispy body as a trophy. At least I

know now who the gods were warning me about all this time. It was

Akina. The one and only, at least she taught me one valuable lesson. She

taught me or rather showed me that I have an incredible power that I

didn't even know about. A whole different side of me that was a mystery

to me for almost eighteen years. I guess that explains all the

encounters with gods and goddesses. Anyway, I should get out of this

suit as soon as bloody possible.

 I moved to a new flat.

Since the other building almost burned down. It's a lot fancier than the

old one. I do miss the old one since it was where my mum and I lived

for most of my life, but my mum is not here now and she's not coming

back, and to be frank, I don't think I'm going to see her very soon,

because I am pretty sure God doesn't want people like me walking around

in his paradise. I don't even know if I still classify as a person,

maybe I'm a demon too, or maybe I'm just going crazy and none of this is

real. I wish that I could get all the answers to my questions.

Hopefully one day I'll understand what's happening and what I am, but

for now, it will remain a mystery. I wonder if Mira is doing okay. She

took off right after I put Akina's place on fire. I could see she was

afraid of me. It still baffles me that she saw Akina's real form but not

mine. I look down at my hands putting my two fingers together and

opening them making a small flame appear. I did do some research on

gods, it might be possible that I'm a god of fire, like Uriel, but that

only explains the fire I hold in my hands. The devil-like appearance I

can't explain just yet. All of these questions and thoughts are driving

me insane, I should take a shower and get to bed, otherwise, I'll drive

myself insane. I took a brisk shower, put on my pj's and went to bed.

After a long day of acting, I need my beauty sleep. [falls asleep]