... Seokjin sighed, carefully resting his bag on the floor beside the booth. The stiff material of his uniform crinkled as he sat down and he tugged at the cuffs of his sleeves and the collar of his jacket. He sighed, shoulders slumping down at dismal angles. Pulling the menu towards him, he stared at it, looking at the items without really seeing them....
... This time of day, the restaurant wasn’t very busy, just a couple elderly people who cast not-so secretive looks in his direction, murmuring sadly as they saw his outfit. He caught an old woman saying something about it being, “a pity he’s got to go so young. He’s so handsome.” Catching a glimpse of his reflection in the metal napkin dispenser, he didn’t feel so handsome; rather, he felt tired, scared and more than a little apprehensive....
... “You gonna order something or are you just going to sit there?”...
... Seokjin’s head snapped up and he met eyes with a small-framed, pale young man. The waiter’s eyes had the prettiest slant that Seokjin had ever seen and the curve of his jaw had to have been carved by a master sculptor....
... “I-I need a minute,” he managed, mentally chastising himself for tripping over his words. The waiter didn’t seem to notice, shrugging and sticking the notepad back in his apron pocket....
... “Take your time,” he said, making to turn around and head back to the bar. Seokjin moved before he could stop himself, reaching out and brushing the waiter’s arm with his fingertips. The pale, young man froze, glancing down at Seokjin’s hand and then turning back around to raise an eyebrow at him....
... “Yes?” The waiter’s voice was amused, but not patronizing and Seokjin sighed again....
... “I know this is probably a bad thing to ask, but…” Taking a deep breath, he plowed forward before he could stop himself. “I-I need someone to talk to. Could you maybe…?”...
... The waiter smiled slightly....
... “Yeah, sure. I’m off in-“ he checked his watch. “-an hour. I know where we can go to talk. If you can wait that long?”...
... Seokjin nodded, and then smiled softly....
... “Thank you. Really.”...
... The waiter waved away the gratitude with an airy hand and headed back to the bar. Grabbing a rag from behind the counter, he began to wipe it down, glancing up, only to see Seokjin’s eyes still on him. Blushing faintly, almost unnoticeably –Seokjin wouldn’t have noticed it if he’d not been watching the waiter so carefully-, he ducked his head and scrubbed at the spotless granite surface with determined forcefulness....
... Seokjin ended up ordering just a simple order of French fries, content to just watch the pale, young waiter as he bustled around, greeting the customers with a tiny smile and a slight bow, eating each bite absentmindedly until his fingers brushed the paper in the basket. The hour passed quickly and before he knew it, the waiter was walking into the back room, untying the apron strings and hanging up the fabric, before grabbing his jacket and signing out....
... “Ready?” He asked, arched eyebrow proud on his face. Seokjin couldn’t find words, just nodding and picking up his bag, heading out. Standing up, he gathered more attention from the newer customers. One old man stood up, walking over to him and shaking his hand, thanking him. Looking at the clock over the bar, Seokjin felt his heart sink to his stomach, seeing that he only had a few more hours left until the bus came to take him away....
... The young waiter only started walking, glancing back to see if Seokjin was following him or not. Unsurprisingly, Seokjin was right behind him, trailing along with a heavy heart. The waiter led them to a pier, sitting down on a bench and looking out into the water with now very sad eyes....
... “So you’re leaving, huh?” He asked, his voice gruff. Seokjin nodded and lay his bag down before sitting down beside the waiter. There was an awkward silence for a moment....
... “My brother left a year ago. We’re still waiting to hear back from him…But we never will and we all know it. Thank you for doing what you’re doing,” the waiter said, voice trembling before he could stop it. Seokjin only sighed, propping an elbow on his knee and resting his chin in his palm....
... “It wasn’t voluntary. I didn’t want to go into the service right now, but my name came up on the draft, and they ordered me to go. So, I’m here now, just waiting to leave. I don’t want to go. I don’t want to fight, and I don’t want-“...
... The waiter looked over at him, face unreadable....
... “Yoongi.”...
... Seokjin blinked....
... “Huh?” He asked, thrown a little off guard....
... “My name. It’s Yoongi. Min Yoongi. Nice to meet you,….?” He said, holding his hand out to shake. Seokjin shook his head to clear it and laughed a little bit. Twisting his body so that he could shake Yoongi’s hand, he introduced himself....
... “I’m Seokjin. Kim Seokjin. Private Kim Seokjin, as it were,” he said, a bit ruefully. Yoongi only nodded....
... “So, what’d you want to talk about?” He asked bluntly. “I mean, let’s be honest. I just met you, so it’s not like we need to talk about what’s going to happen when you leave.”...
... Seokjin shrugged....
... “I’m just…I just need someone to talk to. I’m kinda low right now, and-“ He sighed, rubbing the bridge of his nose between his thumb and first finger. Yoongi slid a little closer, eyes trained expectantly on the soldier’s face....
... “Then, I’m listening,” he said, voice unexpectedly kind. Seokjin leaned back, rubbing his hands over his face....
... He talked about his home, how neither of his parents wanted him to go, how he wanted to be a doctor, how he thought that the war was useless and that too many people were dying for no reason. He talked about how he was so scared because he wasn’t cut out to be a fighter, how he didn’t think that he’d be any good but he’d do his best because he didn’t want to let his family down. He talked about how he wished that he had someone that would write letters to him, telling him that everything was good at home, that someone was safe, because it would make him think that he was protecting them and that what he was doing wasn’t useless. He talked about how he had had to say goodbye and how everybody had cried and how he promised them that no matter what, he’d come home....
... Yoongi was silent, eyes never leaving Seokjin’s face. His concentration was almost unnerving, if Seokjin hadn’t appreciated it so much. The pale waiter reached out a hand and rested it on Seokjin’s knee when the soldier had finished....
... “You know, you can write to me. I’ll write back and trust me, I know how much it’ll mean to you, just to hear your name during mail call.” His voice was blunt, almost monotone, but Seokjin could hear the sincerity in his voice. Gratefully, Seokjin smiled at him, though it was a little tight....
... Scribbling his address down on a slip of paper, Yoongi passed it to the tall soldier, his fingertips being briefly caught in Seokjin’s grip as the older man’s shaking fingers grabbed the paper....
... “It’s about time that the bus was here,” Yoongi remarked, looking down at his watch. Seokjin checked, and indeed, the bus was set to arrive within the next five minutes. Body tense and knees slightly shaky, he started back, the pale waiter at his shoulder....
... The bus rumbled up to the stop, right on time and Seokjin handed his pass to the driver, his bag clutched tightly in his fist....
... “Yoongi, I’m scared,” he whispered, so low that the waiter almost didn’t catch it....
... “It’ll be fine,” Yoongi reassured him, patting the soldier on the back firmly. “You’ll come home someday, you’ll see. You’d better write. Now go, the driver won’t wait forever,” he said, gesturing at the door of the bus. Seokjin sighed shakily and then, with one last glance at the pale waiter, climbed the steps of the bus and set his bag on his lap....
... Yoongi shoved his hands deep in his pockets, but pulled one free to wave as the bus groaned and then thundered out of the station. Seokjin pressed his hand against the glass, turning as far as he could to see the waiter until Yoongi’s small frame was out of sight around the corner....
... ...
... ...
...May 18...
... ...
...Training is hard. But, I’m keeping up somehow, haha. I’ve been issued a gun and it all feels so real now. I’m really scared, Yoongi. How am I going to make it through this?...
... ...
...-Seokjin...
... ...
... ...
...May 29...
... ...
...Nothing goes on in this town. Every day is the exact same, boring and dull as usual. Don’t be scared, Seokjin. You’re going to be alright, remember? Just don’t shoot yourself in the foot....
... ...
...-Yoongi...
... ...
... ...
...June 20...
... ...
...I’m sorry that I haven’t been able to write. I’ve been moved to another base, and the training is even harder here. I don’t get enough sleep and the instructors are really strict. The only thing I have to look forward to is getting a letter from you. I miss you, Yoongi, and I’m surprised by this. I barely know you, after all. How is everything over there?...
... ...
...-Seokjin...
... ...
... ...
...June 27...
... ...
...I don’t care when you can write, just that you’re writing, since it means you’re alive and alright enough to write. Are you getting enough to eat and staying hydrated? That’s the most important thing. The instructors are doing it in your best interest, but I’m sure you know that by now. If all you have to look forward to are letters from me, then I’ll be sure to write you as often as I can. And, I know that we only met once, but I somehow feel like I’ve known you for a long time. Things are still boring here. A bunch of people were drafted out of this town, but I was left behind again. At least I can stay here to write to you. Stay safe, okay?...
... ...
...-Yoongi...
... ...
... ...
...July 5...
... ...
...I was so happy to get your last letter. I’d had a rough day and when I saw that I had mail from you, my heart jumped in my chest. I’m sorry… Is that weird? I’m eating, and drinking a lot of water, but sometimes, it’s hard, because I just want to sleep. I’m out of training now, and I’ll be moved to another base, but I’ll write you whenever possible. I know it’s selfish, but I’m really hoping you don’t get drafted, because I want to keep getting letters from you, and I really want to keep writing to you. I’m sorry…that really does sound weird. I miss you....
... ...
...-Seokjin...
... ...
...July 18...
... ...
...I can’t go near the pier anymore. Every time I see it, I think of when we sat there and you just talked about everything. You’re the last thing I think about before I go to sleep and the first thing I think about when I wake up. I miss you a lot, and I don’t know why. But, other than that, nothing has happened here. I know it’s selfish of me too, but I want to stay to keep getting your letters. Stay safe, okay?...
... ...
...-Yoongi...
... ...
... ...
...August 26...
... ...
...It’s been a while, hasn’t it? I saw battle for the first time a couple weeks ago and I was sick afterwards. I can’t kill anybody, Yoongi. I had my gun aimed right at someone and couldn’t pull the trigger. He looked just as scared as I felt. How can I kill someone who’s just like me, even if he’s the enemy? If I can’t write for a while, I’m sorry. How’re things back home?...
... ...
...-Seokjin...
... ...
... ...
... They sent many letters back and forth, Yoongi congratulating Seokjin on his birthday, and then them wishing each other happy Christmases. The New Year came and went and then, it happened....
... ...
... No letters came. A month, two months, and then three months passed by and Seokjin’s heart grew hardened and he became resigned to the fact that Yoongi wasn’t going to write him again....
... One day, a mortar burst nearby, showering Seokjin and his platoon with debris and shrapnel. Some metal embedded itself in his leg and chest and he went down, crying out as he saw blood. Someone, he didn’t know who, lifted him and carried him away, taking him far from the danger of more explosives. Too much blood was leaving him too fast and he was feeling dizzier and dizzier by the second. Medics yelled over his body, transferring him to a stretcher and loading him onto a truck, speeding down roads until he reached bright, white lights that hung in medical tents....
... A mask was strapped around his head and his vision went entirely dark....
... ...
... “Are you just now waking up? Damn, Private. Welcome back to the land of the living,” a dry voice spoke from nearby. Seokjin tried to sit up, falling back and gasping and the male nurse beside his bed stood up hastily....
... “Let’s not do that, okay, Private? Just lay here a while.”...
... Seokjin’s eyes widened. Those pretty eyes and long-fingered hands were all too familiar to him, though the weariness and fatigue that the nurse carried over him like a cloak was new....
... “Y-Yoongi?” He stuttered. Yoongi cracked an exhausted grin....
... “Thought you’d never recognize me,” he said. Seokjin’s heart soared....
... “You stopped writing, and I thought you’d-“ Unable to continue, Seokjin stopped mid-sentence and instead turned his head to the side. Yoongi sat back down beside him, resting a hand on the undamaged skin on Seokjin’s wrist....
... “I got drafted, but got hurt at basic training, so they made me a nurse. Glad they did, too. You would’ve been in a lot worse shape if they were any shorter on med staff. You should consider yourself lucky that I got assigned to you. Nobody else wanted to dig all that shrapnel out of you. Nobody else had the time, honestly.”...
... Pain medicine stealing consciousness from him, Seokjin hummed low in his throat as he listened to Yoongi talk, the nurse’s voice deep and soothing. Finally looking down and noticing that his patient had fallen asleep, Yoongi smiled faintly, pulling the blanket up to cover the bandages on Seokjin’s chest....
... ...
... Seokjin recovered quickly, much to Yoongi’s distaste. His injuries weren’t so bad that he couldn’t go back out to the field again, and once the last bandage was unwrapped, he picked up his gun again and headed back outside to the truck that was waiting there to take him back to the place where bullets and grenades exploded at all times of the day....
... “Why do you have to go back?” Yoongi asked, catching a hold of Seokjin’s arm. The soldier sighed. It had only been three weeks since he had been away from the field of battle, but it felt like much less time, the nurse staying by his side, holding his hand and stroking the hair off of his face at night. Yoongi had told him stories of what it was like back at home, how the town was so boring, but he wished that they were both back, because then they’d be safe. ...
... Seokjin turned his back to the truck, shifting his gun to hold it in one hand. Tilting Yoongi’s chin up with the other, he pressed a quick kiss to the pale nurse’s mouth, smiling sadly....
... “I’m going back to protect you,” he said, and then with a quick salute, he was gone, leaving the medic standing there, chest tight with fear....
... ...
... Things were different now, the letters sent back and forth filled with more sweet words and statements showing how much they missed each other. Yoongi’s were bitter, but Seokjin’s were always reassuring. They both agreed that they were too young for any of it, though, but they both felt as though they had aged twenty year’s time in the last year or so....
... A month passed since they had last seen each other, but the feelings in the letters grew even stronger until Yoongi’s sole joy in life was to see a letter from the soldier. The same could be said for Seokjin, who would lie awake at night, running his fingers over the tiny scars peppering his chest and thigh, feeling where his medic had painstakingly removed every piece of metal, carefully making sure that the soldier would recover fully....
... His medic. That’s what Seokjin considered Yoongi, and he felt hot surges of jealousy when Yoongi would jokingly tell him about some of the young men who would flirt shamelessly with him. Just as quickly as jealousy rushed through him, warmth and happiness would cascade through his limbs when Yoongi would tell him that none of the men were worth any of his time, other than to make them well and send them either back to the front lines or back home....
... ...
... A week or so passed and Seokjin’s unit advanced even farther, gaining some ground on the enemy. However, more land meant that they were now under even more fire and when a grenade went off in the building beside the one that Seokjin and his battle buddies were in, they fled, right into the path of enemy fire....
... ...
...Everything seemed to happen in slow motion....
... ...
... ...
... Seokjin saw the man on his left go down, arm blown almost all the way off of his body, screaming before a bullet silenced him forever. A sharp pain bloomed in his side, but he didn’t pay any attention to it, dragging his remaining fellow to safety behind an overturned car....
... “Medic!” He screamed, ducking as bullets flew by overhead. “Medic!!”...
... The man in his arms groaned, blood flecking his lips and Seokjin turned his attention to the hole in the soldier’s side....
... “It’ll be okay,” he said. The younger man gasped as Seokjin applied pressure. “You’re going to be okay. How old are you? What’s your name?”...
... It took a moment for the other soldier to catch his breath....
... “Where’s Jungkook? Jungkook was just with us. Where’d he go? What happened to him? Is he okay? Where is he?” The man rambled. Seokjin looked over to where he could see the fallen soldier’s body and shuddered, repeating his own questions....
... “I’m Private Kim. Kim Taehyung… I’m twenty-one. Where’s Jungkook? Is he going to be alright?” Private Kim’s voice was growing weaker and weaker and then, there was a flash of movement as someone ran up to them, keeping low to the ground....
... “Where’s he hurt?” Yoongi’s familiar voice was all business before he looked up and met Seokjin’s eyes. They both froze for a moment, but then, Yoongi was focused back on the weakened soldier....
... “Uh, h-he’s been shot in the side. His name’s Private Kim Taehyung and he’s twenty-one. I applied pressure and managed to slow the bleeding down just a little,” Seokjin said. Automatically, Yoongi cut away a section of Taehyung’s uniform, locating where the wound was. Finding that the bullet had passed clean through the oblique muscle above the young private’s hip, he threaded a needle, pouring antiseptic on the wound and gently shushing the younger man as he cried out....
... “I know it hurts,” he said soothingly, pinching the skin on either side of the tiny hole in the young man’s side, bringing it together. “Just bear with me, and I’ll be done in just a moment.” ...
...“Where’s Jungkook?” Taehyung asked again. Questioningly, Yoongi looked up at Seokjin, hands pausing. It was deadly quiet as the gunfire ceased around them. Seokjin jerked his head to the side and Yoongi peered around the car to see the body of the soldier in question....
... “Do you know how to stitch someone up?” Yoongi asked, applying pressure to Taehyung’s wound with his thumb. Seokjin nodded numbly, not fully aware of what Yoongi was implying....
... “Good. Then stitch him up. I’ll be back in a minute.”...
... Seokjin grabbed Yoongi and tugged him back as the medic made to stand up and run....
... “What are you doing?” He hissed. Yoongi looked at him, eyes hard and resolute....
... “No man left behind, Seokjin,” he said softly. “Don’t worry; I’ll be back in just a moment.”...
... Seokjin’s heart stopped and he yanked the medic down by the strap of his bulletproof vest, kissing him fiercely....
... “I swear, if you don’t come back…” His voice trailed off. Yoongi ran his thumb over Seokjin’s cheek....
... “Trust me, okay?” He whispered. Seokjin only nodded and then Yoongi was gone. Immediately, gunfire snapped out and Seokjin’s heart dropped. Twisting to see where Yoongi had gone, Taehyung let out a cry and Seokjin turned back to what he’d been told to do. Gritting his teeth, he carefully stitched the bullet hole closed. Something was dragged across the ground nearby and the gunfire ceased. Yoongi fell panting to the ground beside Seokjin, the body of the dead soldier clutched tightly to him....
... “Are you hurt anywhere?” Seokjin asked immediately. Yoongi laughed bitterly....
... “Isn’t that my job to ask?” He snapped back, but there was no bite in his voice. Taehyung was staring at the body that Yoongi was holding, and then, he was screaming out Jungkook’s name, trying to get to the boy’s body, tears tracking down his face....
... Seokjin caught him about the waist, wincing as the movement pulled at something painful in his own side. Shushing Taehyung, he situated them so that Taehyung could drape himself over Jungkook’s body, sobbing desperately at the sight of blood and bloodless lips. Yoongi panted, resting his head back against the metal of the car. Glancing to the side as he saw movement, he saw how Seokjin pressed a hand to his side, lifting a bloody palm away....
... Moaning in despair, Yoongi scrambled so that he was sitting in front of Seokjin, cutting away a section of the older soldier’s uniform so that he could patch him up. Much like Taehyung, the bullet had passed through Seokjin cleanly and Yoongi cleaned the wound as best as he could, stitching it shut with hands that were steadier than his breathing. Cradling Yoongi’s shaking body to him after the medic had sewn them all up and issued a time of death for the young soldier who Taehyung had fallen asleep over, Seokjin leaned his head back on the car and prayed to be rescued soon....
... Help came in the form of several tanks that blew their way through the enemy ranks and cleared the way for more troops....
... Yoongi helped to lift Jungkook’s body onto a stretcher and helped Taehyung onto the medical truck as it came up and stopped by them....
... Seokjin assured the commanding officer that he was still in shape enough to fight, lifting his gun to carry as if to prove the validity of this. Begrudgingly, the officer waved Seokjin into the ranks of men flooding their way around buildings, securing the area for more of their troops to come through. Yoongi went with him, stuck at his side doggedly....
... “What are you doing?” Seokjin asked, looking down at his medic. Yoongi ignored him, marching just a bit quicker....
... “Yoongi! Where are you going?” He asked, grabbing the medic’s arm. Yoongi jerked to a stop....
... “I’m not letting you get hurt again. I told you that you’d go back home to your family, and since I’ve had to fix you up twice already, I’m going to be there to fix you up if anything happens again, god forbid, so that you actually can go back home,” he said gruffly, wrenching his arm free. Seokjin watched him march off numbly, the pistol and medic kit at his side....
... Neither of them saw much action, but somehow, they were assigned to the same tent, their cots pulled near each other’s so that Seokjin could hold Yoongi close at night. Yoongi claimed that it was because the nights were getting cold and that he needed to be warm to sleep, but the scared, possessive way that he clung to Seokjin’s shirt spoke differently....
... ...
... “You’re going home.”...
... Yoongi’s jaw dropped and Seokjin’s eyes widened....
... “Sergeant Kim, you’re being honorably discharged. You’re to receive a medal of honor, which will be presented to you when you’re back on base in Korea. The Army recognizes your hard work and dedicated service and you have served your time honorably. Thank you for your service.” The officer delivering the news saluted Seokjin, who raised his arm in salute back, staring after the man as he strode away....
... “That’s great!” Yoongi said finally, voice thick in his throat. Seokjin looked down at him, but Yoongi’s eyes were disarmingly joyful....
... “You’re going home to your family, just like I told you that you would,” he said. Seokjin knew him better at this point, knowing that there was something in Yoongi’s words that was frightened beyond reason. Pulling the medic to the side, he held him as Yoongi fell apart in his arms, crying and clinging to Seokjin as though it was the last time that they were to ever see each other....
... “You’ll be coming home soon, too,” Seokjin said into Yoongi’s hair a while later when the medic had settled into hiccupping sobs and small whimpers. “You’ve been in almost as long as I have and you’ve served well. Besides, they’re bringing in a new shipment of medics, so you’ll come home. Don’t cry, please.”...
... Yoongi fought down his emotions and that night, in their shared tent, they showed each other just how much they loved each other in the most intimate of ways until Yoongi was spent and exhausted under Seokjin and they felt a golden glow to the very tips of their toes....
... Seokjin got on the bus the next day, and when he left, he was reminded of the time that he’d left the town, Yoongi waving at him until they could no longer see each other....
... ...
... Life back home was surprisingly stressful, Seokjin found, anxiously waiting for any news from the front lines where his medic was still stationed, pacing the floor and biting his lips bloody. The private who Yoongi had saved on the day that Seokjin had been shot, happened to live in the same town as Seokjin and the sergeant accepted his invitation to attend Private Jeon’s funeral, standing beside Taehyung, a supporting hand on his elbow as the younger soldier broke to pieces. Seeing the desperation with which Taehyung cried, Seokjin recognized the same love that he and Yoongi shared and a bolt of icy fear stabbed through his chest....
... The news was playing every single minute, Seokjin watching for any news of the war, for its end, or for it to grow less fierce. Every day, he checked the names of those who had fallen in the line of duty, but thankfully, he never saw the one name that he was scared most to see....
... His family was beyond happy to see him back, his mother crying and his little brother hugging him so tightly that he almost couldn’t breathe. However, they could all tell that something had changed in the young man that they had seen off so many years ago. Seokjin was now quieter, his presence now more silent that ever before. He would wake up screaming sometimes late at night and those times, his mother would hold him, pressing comforting lips to his hair until Seokjin would fall asleep, exhausted from fighting nightmares away....
... Walking down the street, he would pass the pier every day, seeing the bench where he’d first met Yoongi and feeling his body seize with fear as he realized that he didn’t know where his beloved medic was....
... One day, he found that his steps had taken him to the café where he’d first seen Yoongi, sitting down in the booth and looking around. He saw a young man in his Army uniform ordering something from a pretty girl with a bow tying her hair back and Seokjin smiled softly as he asked if she could sit with him. The television was on in the upper corner of the café and the news was playing, scrolling through the list of that day’s fallen soldiers....
... The list faded into a report delivered by a solemn-looking young woman holding a microphone and standing in front of a medical tent. Seokjin stood, dread pouring through him though he didn’t know what the report was about quite yet....
... “Soldiers are calling him the ‘Miracle Medic.’ This young man has been seen saving countless soldiers’ lives in the field. Earlier today, he removed and assisted an astonishing seventy-eight people from a collapsed building after a grenade blew it to pieces, though he’d suffered severe injuries himself, and each and every one of these men have survived and are expected to make a full recovery. All of them are crediting their survival to this ‘Miracle Medic.’ Let’s hear what some of them have to say.” The pretty young reporter turned to some of the soldiers standing near her, holding her microphone out....
... “If he hadn’t been around, I wouldn’t be here right now. He’s got some sort of magic touch, I swear. I’ve never seen any medic work as quickly or efficiently as he did. I can’t do anything but sit here and pray for him right now, though, and hope that he pulls through this. He didn’t even give a sign that he was even a little bit hurt until he’d gotten everybody out of the building and tended to. And then, he just collapsed.”...
... All eyes in the café were on Seokjin as he moved towards the television as though he was submerged in water....
... “What’s the medic’s name? How is he doing at the moment? Has he used one of his miracles on himself?” The reporter asked a doctor that had come out of the flaps of the tent, holding his surgical gloves in his hands and looking particularly grim....
... “I’m sorry, but the ‘Miracle Medic’ used his miracles up on everybody else. His sacrifice won’t be forgotten. Sergeant Min Yoongi was pronounced dead at exactly sixteen hundred hours this afternoon. We did everything we could but his injuries were too extensive, and he couldn’t fight any longer.”...
... Seokjin’s head spun and his legs gave out on him. Falling to his knees, he stared at the linoleum in front of him. Dimly, he heard a commotion of people swarming around him, hands patting him and asking if he was alright. Distantly, he noted Taehyung crouching by him, pulling him to his feet and helping him from the restaurant to the car. Driving them to Seokjin’s house carefully, Taehyung helped Seokjin out of the car and explained the situation to Seokjin’s mother as she rushed out of the house....
... They sat him down on the couch and his mother thanked Taehyung, coming to sit beside her son once the other soldier had left. Seokjin lifted his eyes to hers, and it was only when he saw the pity and sympathy there that he finally lost it, sobbing uncontrollably. His mother patted his back, holding her son as he mourned. When Seokjin’s father came home, he saw them still sitting there, Seokjin still as inconsolable, sitting beside his son and letting Seokjin cling to him as his mother went to prepare dinner for the rest of the family....
... “I know, son,” his father said. “I know it hurts. But, he did a lot of good, you know? He saved so many people’s lives…” His father’s voice trailed off. Seokjin’s breath caught in his chest, but he didn’t say anything in response to what his father had said....
... ...
... ...
... The funeral was an elaborate affair, the cold December air blowing through the bare branches of trees that guarded the perimeter of the cemetery. Seokjin, as per Yoongi’s final request, had borne the folded flag up to the coffin that held the remains of his most loved one, tears streaking down his cheeks despite his efforts to remain stone-faced. The general standing there accepted the flag and lay it on Yoongi’s chest, crossing the unresponsive arms over it. Seokjin couldn’t look down at the body, eyes instead fixed blankly ahead....
... The families of all those who Yoongi had saved were in attendance, their sons bowing their heads and mourning shamelessly, but Seokjin didn’t cry. His tears dried up and his eyes felt tight. He stood beside the grave as the coffin was lowered into it, saluting slowly as the general did. The guns went off and dirt was piled atop the casket, covering Yoongi’s final resting place from view....
... The chaplain said his final words and the assembly filed away from the grave. Fittingly, the sky opened up and rain poured down, soaking through Seokjin’s uniform and chilling him to the bone. Taehyung came and guided him away gently, Seokjin refusing to look back....
... When he got home, his mother was standing at the door, holding a white envelope in her hand, pale as a sheet. Seokjin didn’t even have to look to see who had sent it, climbing up the stairs to his room and falling onto his bed to read the final words that had been sent to him....
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...November 29...
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...Dear Seokjin,...
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...I never actually told you this, but I love you. I love you so much that it hurts. I never got the chance to actually say it to your face. Well, I guess I did, but I never said it… I’m so sorry that I won’t be coming home. Don’t cry too much, alright? I know that it hurts, but I know that you’ll get through it. Did everybody make it out alright? Did we win the war? I just hope that all of this wasn’t for nothing. I used to be so scared of dying, but now? I’m not afraid. I’m so sorry, Seokjin. I don’t want to leave you, but my body hurts too much for me to do much else. I can’t feel my legs and the doctors said that that’s because of how my back was broken when that grenade went off. I was really close to it. I guess that I’m lucky that I didn’t lose any limbs. Are you taking care of yourself? Are you staying hydrated and fed? Drink plenty of water and get enough sleep. You’re very important, and so you need to take care of your body. Did you know that they promoted me right before they told me that I wasn’t going to make it? Anyway, that doesn’t matter....
...Seokjin, I can see the pier right now. I remember how I saw your smile that day and I thought it was the most beautiful thing in the world. I wish I could have seen you once last time, but I don’t want you to see me like this. There’s nothing that you’d recognize....
...I love you, Seokjin. Kim Seokjin, I love you so much, and I’ll love you until I can’t love you anymore. I love you more than anything else in this world. But, you’ve got to get over me. Don’t live in the past, Seokjin. I know that you’re going to hurt, because I’m hurting writing this letter, but one day, you’ll find that you don’t hurt so much....
...Please live your life and smile. Even if you don’t feel like it, please smile, even if it’s just for me....
...I love you....
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...Love,...
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...-Min Yoongi...
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...***************************************************** ...
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...Notes:...
...this story hits a little closer to home than i'd like...
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