Cover+past

January 3.2021/Sunday/12:57am

Hello...Im Pam...here I will tell my problems in my life well I wont be telling my present in this episode...so when I was 6 I saw my friend using the computer in the computer lab while it was comouter time because he was finished with his task in Computer time he can use the computer for a while...I was curious about what he was doing so I got up and went to him..”Carlo!! what are you doing?” with a cute and innocent voice so Carlo turned around said “oh Pam..Im making a game using Microsoft word” with a confidence in his voice so I asked “how do you do that?” with confused and innocense in ny voice “oh..you just do this” with a caring and confident voice after he thought me he told me that to save his progress Carlo bought a USB so I asked mom she said no and I begged her for 1 year and she got mad at me and shouted at me to stop with an angry and dissapointed voice I was horrified so from that day I told my self to never ask for anything again...thats when my fear for rejection started..and I barely ask for anything until one day it was a very special day for the school so our clubs did alot of things so I were batch 2 or is it 1 agh!! What ever!! So it was the other’s batch turn so we went on a break and I was talking to a friend of mine called Dyan but while I was talking to her..I saw Jayden’s sister pointing at me or rather my Mickey mouse tsum tsum toy...the Mickey mouse was really special for me because it was my stress reliever and when I was done talking to Dyan Mickey mouse was missing I did cried all night and begged my mom to check the cctv but..she said next time...after 1 year..I asked again and she said it was a long time ago so its probably not there anymore..I was heart brokened and thats where..I completely didnt want to ask again...but those times she always supoirts my sister so my father supports me..and then she had cancer..while I was massaging her back I said mom “this enough?” and she didnt answer so I kept massaging her until we needed to eat breakfast and she still didnt talk...while we were eating my dad screamed “MOM ISNT BREATHING” with sadness in his voice and me and my sister ran to the bedroom and cried...and I told my self “if only I massaged her well she wouldnt die” since that day I changed I didnt wanna get out if bed and take a shower until my dad met Tita Carol..and now she lives here and she thinks I hate her but I dont at all...but since the day my mom died I cried every night for no particular reason...but I started watching anime and the crying stopped because all I thought about all night is Todoroki and Bakugo from My hero academia

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