4) i still love him...

******

The next day, as soon as Shane entered the locker room, her phone rang. She was surprised to see who herbearly caller was 'cuz nice'.

She immediately answered the call. "Oh? It's too early for you to call?."

"It's really early! When it comes to you my dear, cousin." She said immediately.

"Hmmm ?."

"Hey! Can you update on social media Shane? They are waving at you on the messenger .Am I your mother? Why are they always asking me about your whereabouts?"she just laughed at her cousin because she could already imagine her annoyed face.

"Why is there news in group chat? Wait, what gc are you referring to?".

"What do you mean? The BES !. But don't tell me that you forgot too ?." She asked in a high pitch.

"Hahaha. Seriously, I'm not updated but I'm not that forgetful." She reacted. "What's the news on our gradeschool batch ?."

"There will be a second reunion again. You must be present because when we first met you're an MIA girl. So don't give me any reasons this time. Cause i will come to you and drag you here. Do you understand?"

Reunion. She didin't able to come at their first reunion, because it was right after their college graduation. She was heartbroken at that time so she did not show up. She also left their town to forget. And it's been 5 years already since they haven't meet. She is not yet ready to met them.

"Why are you quiet there ?." She asked her. "Don't tell me you're planning to make excuses again ?."

"Ha? No, i'm not." She refused.

"Don't lie to me this time. By hook or by crook you need to be present. Don't you miss us? 5years Shane! Then until now, you still won't show up?" She dramatically said.

"When?."

"December 23rd, I know you don't have work that time so you have no excuse for me."

She would have lied but maybe this will be the right time to show up to her family again.

She did not show up because she is not yet ready to remember the pain she had suffered before. Five long years is enough to heal the wounds of the past.

"Ok, I'll be there." She replied to her.

"Really ?." She assured. "Sure, Shane, huh? If you will back out this time, even if the crow turns white, I will never really talk to you again."

"Sure. Promise I will go." She promised here.

"And don't worry about the expenses. It was all set. All you need is your presence 'girl."

"Really ?."

One of the reasons he does not want to show up is because he is also shy. Her friends and former classmates, most of them have good lives. Have their own family and business. While she is still just a humble operator.

I don't underestimate this kind of work. But because I have lots of good plans for myself back then. But I locked myself in a bitter past and did not dare to rebuild it.

That is also the reason why I think so little of myself. Even though i'm a regular employee.

"Isn't it embarrassing? Almost all of you have been successful in your own careers. While I have been here for five years." Sad to say.

"But you are regular, so that's okay, isn't it? And not everyone achieves their dreams. There are also a few in the group who are not lucky. "She encouraged her.

"Yeah, thanks."

"Bring your boyfriend too,because it's ok to bring or even a husband too hahaha." She added.

"I don't have a boyfriend." She complained.

"Do you have a boyfriend Elle?". Janice suddenly appeared behind me.

She tries to interrupt in our conversation with Nice. "Hey! Are you Elle's boyfriend?" She asked trying to snatch her cp.

"Huh?" Asked my cousin.

I tried to snatch the cp from my friend. "Don't mind her, she's just my crazy friend."

"Hey." She complained in her statement. She turned to her cousin again.

"I will go, I will go home before the said date."

"Ok, I'm counting on you Shane." She reminded.

"Yeah, bye." She bid goodbye to her. After talking to her cousin, she faced her friend. Her friend smiled like a fool. There was a hidden smile on the corner of her lips.

"What?" She asked softly and at the same time opened the locker to put her belongings.

"Tell me Elle, is he your boyfriend?" She asked.

"She's not my boyfriend, she's my cousin. You fool."

"Duh! Why do you have to promise that you will go? Wherever you want to go?" She asked suspiciously.

"I promised to go home on Dec 23rd."

"It's next week. But wait, isn't our company's party at 22nd? So you're going home after the party?".

"That's it." After getting dressed, they entered.

They have a uniform that is only inside the company and it is forbidden to wear it outside. Because their products are sensitive, even a little dust is not allowed. And after their uniform, they will wear a bunnysuit.

Due to the upcoming Christmas events, everyone have been busy. Unlike before every break was noisy, now it is very quiet because others are busy preparing for the said event.

There are contest held in each department. There is Miss Santa, Christmas carols Jingle songs and the song must be original. They also have a dance contest.

I am not fond of gatherings so I also do not participate in contests. Even my friends don't even join the contests yet.

We have planned not to join so, but the higher bosses brought a memo that it's a must because the CEO will come to the event and will have an announcement. And she haven't met their CEO himself.

While they head home she remembered what her cousin said about their 'GC so she took the cp in the bag and looked at it.

It turns out that the 'GC'notif is off, that's why she hasn't recieve any. While she was busy with her cellphone, three were busy sharing some gossips.

She just backreaded the convo when she read James' chat on gc. It says:

"I'll be there it's been a while since we last met guys." James.

"Yes, 5 years without a hint, huh?" One of our classmates commented.

"That's right, so we should all be present."Our president, Angel said.

I didn't finished reading because Janice cut me off. I give her a bored look.

"What?" I ask in a bored way.

"Aren't you going to tell us, who's the guy before?." I stopped at her question. The three of them also stopped and looked at me waiting for my answer.

"I don't know, I don't remember him." She lied.

"You know what? I also waited a few weeks for you to say something but your mouth was still shut. You said that when the time come. It's weeks ago, there was still nothing." She reminded her.

"Because I don't really remember him." She still lied.

"But girl, you didn't even tell us that he was one of our new engineer." Janice accused.

"Is the guy really handsome?" Kathy asked.

"I thought I was just hallucinating when I once saw him in the hallway, so it was really him." Thalia said.

"I don't know. I don't remember him." She still denied it. She has no intention of telling her friends about the past.

"That handsome one? You can't remember?" Janice reacted.

"Cause, you know what Janice? I erase the memories of people who are not important to me." After commenting, she resumed walking.

"Ouch, that deep ha? It seems like there's a meaning to it?" Thalia said.

"Yeah, i sense also and i think its more deeper than we thought."Kathy added.

"Think whatever you want guys" She ignored them. "Bye guys." She bid goodbye to them.

**

When she entered the house, her sister ask her immediately.

"Hey Elle. Mama called again, she ask when are you going home?".

"On Saturday I will go home." Her sister was shocked by my answer. I always said soon before.

"True? Are you really coming home?" She asked assuredly.

"Yes, and then I promised Nice also that I would go to our reunion."

"Are you going? What if?" She did not continue what she was about to say. She knew the reason why i didn't come home, yet.

"We've met already." He said briefly. Suddenly her sister turned to her.

"How? When? Where? Why didn't you tell me anything?" She said suddenly.

"What for? It doesn't matter."

"So, are you okay?"

"I'm fine, no worries. And it's been a long time. It's time to moved on."She lied.

"Are you? Really?" She ask worried.

"I don't want to think about jim anymore. I've already moved on. And anyway, no matter how i tried to stay away. I can't, now."

"What do you mean?"

"He's one of the company's new engineers."

"Wow what a coincidence."

"Yeah, you could say that. I'll go to my room now, i'm tired." She excused.

She and her sister lived in one house. It was their mother's friend. And fortunately they are now living in the states. So they were free to stay there as long as they want.

Her sister is a pharmacist at a pharmacy just near them. Only his family knew what had happened then.

His parents did not force him to go home but they did not tire of asking when he would return home.

Maybe it's time to face and just bury my past forever.

Someone would say that it was just a small thing. That i shouldn't be hurt by that. But not to me.

I grew up with self-esteem because that was what my dad always taught then. I am a shy person but sometimes talkative when my cousins ​​are with me.

As much as my family values ​​me, so do I. I liked him for a long time but you won't see a hint cause i don't give motives.

I used to be a tough one and a softy inside. But i was laid by him and fall. It was my first time to be confessed by a man, who happens to be my ultimate crush. So who wouldn't fall for that? I don't have a beauty to show off, but i trusted his words. And that makes me angrier even more.

He made me a fool. I believed in his sweet words. His sweet gestures. And i trusted him with all my heart but he just broke it.

I am also a negative thinker sometimes, so I do not believe in their flowery tongues. But i believed him. Maybe, thats the reason why i was so hurt. Because after all what he did to me, i still love him.

I completely lost confidence in people like him.I became even more unfamiliar with men.

Although I am not a man hater, I just made a wall for his kinds so that I will not be hurt again.

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