Episode 20

Liam's POV

I walked out to the party after sending off Hannah to Amy. My head kept replaying the scene when Hannah kissed me. She was drunk. She didn't know what she was doing. I couldn't do what she wanted me to do. It wouldn't be fair. I know she's still hung up on Trey.

"Hey, there you are!" Alex suddenly called as she came up beside me, a little tipsy by the looks of it. I kinda smiled as she reached my side.

"Um, so you're ready to go?" I asked. Alex just nodded and stiffled a yawn.

We walked to my bike, Alex's tiny frame plastered to my side as she droned about the people we knew at the party. I just made the appropriate noises to assure her I was listening.

I drove Alex back to her apartment. When I sent her to her apartment building, she got off the bike but I didn't. I took off my helmet, though. She handed me the helmet she had been wearing. She smiled as she stood on the curb and smoothed her hair in place.

"Well, thanks for tonight. And congratulations on your win tonight. Um, so, goodnight. " Alex said shyly as she looked at me.

"Yeah, goodnight." I said with a small smile. Feeling like it was only good manners, I leaned in to her and kissed her softly on her cheek. Her cheek felt soft and cool. I was about to pull away when she put her right hand on my cheek and brushed her lips against mine. It was soft and nice, exactly what a first kiss should be. Then, she pulled away and smiled as she walked away to her apartment building. I waved to her a little bit and waited for her to get in the building. When she was finally in, I put on my helmet, my head in a muddle. I was visibly cursing myself when I found myself remembering and replaying Hannah's drunken kiss in my mind, instead of thinking about Alex's kiss that happened a mere 3 minutes ago. And as I drove back to my dorm, all I could think of was how Hannah looked at me and how she felt in my arms and how good she tasted in spite of the alcohol that reeked around her. I almost drove over to her dorm already wondering if Hannah got back okay, when I quickly gave myself a mental shake. Shit, stop thinking of that stupid kiss. She was drunk, she didn't mean it. But as I parked my bike at my dorm building, I knew that I was totally and utterly fucked when I wished that she had.

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I felt every muscle on my body ache and my mouth felt like someone had stuff cotton balls in it full to the brim. My head felt heavy, like it was filled with lead. I groaned as I struggled to sit up. The throbbing got worse when I was finally sitting up. I could feel nausea started to rise at the back of my throat. Hastily, I jumped off the bed and ran to the bathroom, barely making it to the toilet bowl when I started hurling out last night's tequila and God knows what else. After a minute of dry heaving, the nausea finally subsided and I sat on the cold floor, panting for breath. Slowly, I got up and grabbed my toothbrush. I brushed my teeth with my knees shaking, threatening to buckle from under me. After I have brushed my teeth and washed my face, I felt tons better and could finally walk upright to my room. Well, almost upright.

In my room, I took an unopened bottle of water and drained the whole thing in 3 gulps. While I was opening another bottle, my room door opened and Amy stepped in, looking chirpier than I would like. She looked over at me and smiled.

"Good afternoon, Miss Hannah. Had a good night sleep? " Amy said, sounding impossibly upbeat at... 3 p.m. Oh... God.. I've slept half the day away.

"Please stop talking. Your voice is stabbing me in the brain..." I croaked out pathetically. Amy chuckled as she sat on her already made bed. Suddenly she looked at me, frowning.

"Hey, Hannah. What happened yesterday? I mean, you were really pissed with Liam. You called him an asshole." Amy asked curiously.

As I was gulping the water, I felt the liquid was stuck in my throat. Last night's event flashed through my head and I almost sprayed the water I was swallowing. I ended up in a coughing fit and I was heaving like I was choking. Amy quickly patted me on the back and somehow my coughing/choking subsided. I felt like I wanted to crawl inside myself and just curl up and die. Shit, shit, shit!! As much as I hated to admit it, I had thrown myself at Liam and... I kissed him. And he pushed me away. Oh God, the horror! He had said no and he left to find Alex. Sweet, gorgeous, small, petite Alex. I groaned in frustration as I buried my face into my mangled pillow and screamed as loud as I could, my voice muffled by the pillow, thank goodness.

"Hannah, what happened? Wait, you know what, you need coffee. Let's go out. I'm hungry. Get up!"Amy commanded. Grudgingly, I obliged.

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"Oh. My. God."Amy gasped after I told her what happened last night. I hung my head in my hands, too embarrassed to look up. I cringed when I had flashes of what happened last night. If only I could turn back time, I would smack myself unconscious and all this wouldn't have happened.

"Oh, wow, Hannah. That's ahh... That's pretty crazy. So, have you talked to him yet? " Amy asked carefully. I just shook my head no and let out a long-suffering sigh. I felt so crappy and humiliated.

"Ok, what exactly did you say? You kissed him, he pushed you away.." Amy asked as she looked at me.

"I can't remember what I said. Only flashes of what happened. And trust me, that's enough for me to want to crawl into a hole and die. I actually remember him pushing me away. If that's not mortifying enough, then I don't know what is." I said in frustration.

"So, what are you going to do?" Amy asked, looking at me all agog.

"I will avoid him like the plague." I promised myself with a raw determination, not really realizing until later that it's easier said than done.

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It's Monday morning and I was laying low. I didn't have class with Liam that morning, so that's a relief. I walked to my first class with Dan. I hadn't told Dan. I wanted to, but he looked distracted this morning. And pale. I wondered why.

We were sitting around waiting for Prof Simon and Dan looked worse for wear. I touched his arm and he turned to look at me. His eyes looked haunted. It got me worried.

"Dan, what's wrong? You look worn out. Did something happen?" I asked worriedly.

"Argh, I'm screwed Hannah." Dan said and groaned as he buried his face into his folded arm. It shook me a little bit, so I reached over and took his hand in mine.

"Come on, fess up. What happened?" I asked Daniel worriedly. He sighed and started talking.

"I had a study date with Van Hiroshi last night. Ryan was out and he usually come in late. One thing led to another, we ended up making out on my bed." Dan started telling his story.

"Wait, the hot Japanese baseball player, Van Hiro? The Van Hiro?! " I exclaimed in disbelief.

"Yeah, the one and only." Dan said and couldn't help smiling. Yeah, I would, too coz Van was hot! Well, not as hot as Liam.. At least to me.. Oh God, Liam.. Gotta stop thinking about him.

"You lucky bitch!" I exclaimed and hit him on the arm. He chuckled but then got serious again. He sighed and continued.

"Well, while we were kissing, my door flew open and Ryan was talking about something and stopped when he saw us. I was on the bed with Van between my legs, his tongue down my throat. We were not naked, but that's enough to shock the hell out of Ryan. He stared at us and then he turned and ran off. I called and went after him but he was already gone. He didn't come back last night. I'm so scared Hannah. I'm scared he would tell my parents before I get to." Dan said and looked worriedly at me.

I stared at him. Oh gosh, my problem was nothing compared to this. I took his hand in mine and squeezed. He squeezed back.

"Look, maybe Ryan was shocked. I mean he never thought you were gay. You never told him. I say just give him some time to adjust to the idea. When the time comes, you guys should sit together and talk." I said, trying to comfort him. He looked at me, his brows furrowed with worry.

Just them, Prof Simon came in and we turned our attention to him, our problems momentarily forgotten.

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