part 4: The Hope That hurt

After the first fall out,

          Ritvik apologized.

And not just with words — but with actions.

He messaged more.

He called more.

He told me how his day went, shared little things, showed up.

And somewhere in that sudden attention, I started to feel warm again.

Maybe I was right to give him another chance.

Maybe this is what it looks like when someone tries.

He messaged me every time he was free — morning, night, didn’t matter.

And me?

I replied. Always.

Because every beep on my phone still lit something in me.

I was still checking — still hoping — still waiting for every notification to be him.

And for a while… it was.

It felt simple. Safe. Sweet.

But I don’t know if something inside me was already broken from before…

Or if it cracked somewhere in the middle of this so-called love.

Because one evening, without even planning to, I asked:

“Why don’t you love me?”

It was quiet for a moment.

Then he said, “I don’t love you. But I like you. I want to be with you.”

I paused.

Smiled.

But something in me sank.

I pushed a little more, “Why are you even with me, then?”

He replied, “At first, your face didn’t matter to me that much.”

That one line hit me in a way I didn’t expect.

Like I was… tolerable.

Not someone he wanted — just someone who fit.

Barely.

He added, “I liked your family values. I want a partner who’s respectful to elders, who’s pure… you know.”

And that’s when my thoughts spiraled.

So that’s what he liked.

Not me — the idea of me.

My manners. My upbringing. My “purity.”

Not my sarcasm. Not my sadness. Not my actual soul.

Just the shell.

Just the checklist.

And in that moment, I wondered —

If he ever met someone with better values, would he leave me without thinking twice?

It wasn’t jealousy.

It wasn’t anger.

It was the ache of realizing I might not be loved for who I am — but for what I represented.

A respectful girl. A "good" girl.

And yet… I didn’t say a word.

I didn’t tell him it hurt.

I didn’t say that something inside me dimmed that day.

I just smiled. Nodded. Laughed it off.

And tucked it all inside.

Because I didn’t want to seem sensitive. Or insecure.

Because I was scared that if I spoke my heart, he’d walk away again.

So I stayed silent.

And that’s how my overthinking began —

Not from something explosive.

But from something soft.

A whisper that said, Maybe I’m not enough just as I am.

. (ignore this my words did not reach the minimum requirement of writing but have no idea what I am writing how far must I write to reach just 500 words never knew it will be this hard to just reach 500 word still few letters left huhu.

   Finally it reached 🥂)

Download

Like this story? Download the app to keep your reading history.
Download

Bonus

New users downloading the APP can read 10 episodes for free

Receive
NovelToon
Step Into A Different WORLD!
Download MangaToon APP on App Store and Google Play