the past will always haunt it's victim

The door closed with a soft click. Indicating the end of their conversation since Alexander finally left Kai alone. Now Alone again with his own thoughts and memories Kai sighed running a hand through his hair. He felt like he was trapped. Because he was. Trapped in a golden cage he couldn't escape from. Kai let out a shaky breath, curling deeper into the blankets. His body ached with exhaustion, his mind frayed raw. He snuggled into one of the pillows trying to find whatever comfort he could in it. "I’ll sleep just a little," he told himself. "Just enough to clear my head." though this definitely didn't clear his mind. It wss just a substitute. At that moment Kai just wanted nothing more than to just d!e. He was tired and had nothing to live for. So why live for this long? The firelight flickered low, shadows dancing across the walls. His eyelids fluttered shut. But he felt watched as if the shadows were men from his past watching him. He felt exposed and vulnerable again.

And the past came crawling back.

Tokyo Japan. in a hotel room.....A man’s hand on his back. Violating him. The man's dark eyes roamed over Kai's body like Kai was nothing more than art to be observed and ruined. After all...Kai was just a mindless puppet and $ex toy for the higher ups in society. So what right does he have to complain? The man Whispered in Kai's ear his hand now moving to grip his neck. “You’re so pretty, Kai. You’ll make us both rich. Take off your clothes and give me a good time...i need to see if your worth the hassle with all that sass and defiance i see in your eyes. That does go quite well with clients if you do it in a certain way...~”

Kai could only mutter a few words as he undressed himself while the man's disgusting tongue was over his neck leaving H!ickeys and marks. "Yes, Mr Kurai..."

A cheap apartment. Barely any furniture other than a matress and some empty ramen packets.

Kai sitting cross-legged on the floor, counting money with trembling hands. He kept counting as blood dripped onto one of the bills. He reached up to touch his nose. He had a nosebleed. His tears also mixing with the blood as he sobbed silently.

A knock on the door it was loud, sharp and angry.

“You owe more, pretty boy. You don’t just walk away. Listen your daddy ain't payed it yet so come on!"

...then anotehr vision...it was dark but Kai was transported into his body.

A bar. The lights were quite dim and he could make out a bartender pleasing the woman by doing some tricks as some of the other escorts led rich old men into private rooms.

Laughter. Too much wine...too much alcohol.

A client’s face too close, breath hot and sour against his neck.

“Smile for me, sweetheart. That’s what I’m paying for. You don't want to disappoint me right? Or else I'll have to tell Mr Kurai, and we remember what happened last time right?"

The man said as his hand trailed down squeezing Kai's @ss.

...

A vision came before him. He was in it...he was the one.

Running.

Breathless, panicked, down a dark street. The lights were dimmed...like the world was spinning around him as he continued to run the soles of his feet dirty and bloody.

Lights behind him. Shouts. Footsteps. Breaking objects and gunshots. Blood trailed down Kai's legs as he continued to run. The red lipstick he had been wearing that damned night now smudged. He was half naked and his hair was disheveled but he couldn't stop running ducking into an alley a final gunshot came off and words...a rough japanese accent speaking in English a man with black glasses and tattoos followed him.

“Where do you think you’re going, Kai? You’re nothing without us.”

another flash came before his eyes. A dark room. He couldn't see anything but he could feel chains around his body he tried to scream but nothing came out. Nothing could be heard he felt like the chains were tightly around him as he fell even further into darkness like it was an endless pit.

A voice, rough and cold, speaking in Russian. Not from the past. From now. From the present.

“You’re mine, Kai. I won’t let you go. I can be different if you give me the chance to be...” Kai wanted to laugh in his dream. Different?! How could a man be different from another? All they wanted was Kai's body. Kai knew the second he gave Alexander the pleasure he gave to so many men before him Alexander would discard him like a used $ex toy. Like nothing to be loved but to be ab#sed and hated.

He flinched awake, heart hammering, a thin sheen of sweat on his skin. He quickly sat up in the middle of the bed his eyes barely open but sharp. His black eyes scanned the room like a fox.

The room was still dark, the fire nearly dead...there was no sign of a man or men...no sign of his boss or family. Nothing. Just the room that felt colder than it actually was. The huge walls didn't help with the emptiness if anything they made it worse.

For a long moment, Kai just sat there, breathing hard, arms wrapped tight around his knees. He buried his face in his thighs feeling the tears well up in his eyes as they slowly streamed down his face...hot tears rolled down his pale cheeks. His nose now red from sniffling and his hair messy from the sudden wake up. The sudden nightmare he couldn't escape...the voices. The touches. The eyes.

It’s over, he told himself. Japan is gone. That life is gone. But his chest ached, and his mind whispered a darker truth. A truth he had always been running from trying to bury trying to destroy no matter what it took. No matter how long it took. Wether it was seconds, minites, hours, days, weeks, years or even decades he didn't care. He just wanted that truth gone. perished beyond his sight. But of course his fate was crueler than any truth. He was a runaway who tainted his family name when all he wanted to do was survive. Was it truly his fault?

He hadn’t escaped. He hadn't moved on completely he just forced himself to believe he did. For his own sanity and wellness. But He’d just traded one cage for another. One rusted cage for a golden one. Was it truly a golden cage? After all when your freezing cold water feels like warm...and warm water feels like your burning.

Kai just stood up and silently grabbed his jacket off of the chair. Searching the pockets he found some sleeping pills. Without water or hesitation he popped two sleeping pills into his mouth and walked over sitting back down on the bed... Kai looked straight at one of the secret cameras on the bedside table which was hidden among the decorations. Alexander probably planted it. Kai gave it the middle finger before angrily getting back under the blankets and finally falling asleep with no distractions this time... Alexander on the other hand was in his office when he detected movement on the cameras. He opened his laptop and checked the footage chuckling to himself seeing how helpless and angry Kai was. He let out a low growl. Like a feral animal. "You're not getting away from me, Little fox... Not when I know more about you than you do about yourself..."

Alexander chuckled lowly to himself and sipped his now cold coffee.

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