CHAPTER THREE: Operation: Steal a Kiss
Location: Sunny Park. Mission: Impossible.
If love had a soundtrack, today’s would be the awkward crinkle of picnic blankets, the suspicious hiss of water bottles being unscrewed, and the erratic pounding of four very competitive hearts.
Jake was the first to break the silence.
“I brought string cheese!” he beamed, laying out snacks with a little too much force. “And grapes! Elvis likes grapes! Right, baby bean?”
Elvis, kneeling on the grass and trying to spread a blanket, blushed immediately. “Y-Yeah… I do.”
Lucas appeared beside him, helping smooth out the corners. “You forgot the cutlery, Jake,” he said smoothly, placing down real silverware. “Don’t worry, sunshine. I brought everything.”
“Elvis can eat with his fingers if he wants,” Thompson muttered, dropping a massive bottle of fizzy juice in the center of the setup. “He’s perfect no matter how messy he gets.”
“That sounds… oddly specific,” August commented, setting down a covered tray of color-coded sandwiches. “I’ve prepared bite-sized options. No crumbs. I remember how he dislikes greasy fingers.”
Elvis, frozen in place, stared at the growing buffet.
“…You guys really didn’t need to do all this.”
Jake flopped onto the grass next to him, puppy-like. “We wanna! It’s your date day!”
Elvis blinked. “But it’s our date…”
Jake paled. “Oh no. It’s a shared date.”
All four boys subtly glanced at each other.
Target: Elvis.
Objective: Steal a kiss.
Obstacle: Three other love-crazed idiots.
---
PHASE ONE: THE DISTRACTION TACTIC
Lucas made the first move.
While Elvis reached for a strawberry, Lucas leaned in, just a little, voice soft. “You have jam on your cheek.”
“I do—?” Elvis blinked.
“Here,” Lucas said, gently brushing the spot… and then brushed again, slower, thumb grazing his soft skin.
Elvis’s breath hitched.
This is it, Lucas thought, tilting forward slightly, his lips a whisper away—
“Oi!” Thompson barked. “Back off, Silverhair. He wants juice.”
Lucas froze. Thompson plopped a glass into Elvis’s hands, winked, and smirked at Lucas.
Elvis sipped it nervously. “I-It’s fizzy…”
“Just like you, baby.”
Lucas scowled. Round one: blocked.
---
PHASE TWO: THE SURPRISE ATTACK
Thompson’s plan? Go bold. Go quick.
He waited until everyone was distracted by August trying to open a stubborn lunch box, then slid next to Elvis on the grass, all relaxed confidence and simmering heat.
“You know,” he said, low and rough, “your lips are lookin’ extra soft today.”
Elvis turned red immediately. “W-Why would you say that—!?”
Thompson grinned. “So I could do this—”
SWOOP
Just as his face inched forward, a frisbee smacked the back of his head.
“OOF—!” he shouted.
“Whoops!” Jake waved innocently from across the field. “Bad aim!”
Lucas picked up the frisbee calmly. “Don’t throw things at Elvis. What if you missed?”
Thompson hissed, rubbing his head. Elvis trembled beside him, still pink.
Round two: intercepted.
---
PHASE THREE: THE “ACCIDENTAL” GAME
August waited until after lunch.
He proposed a walk around the flower garden nearby. “Fresh air. Movement. And maybe…” he adjusted his glasses, “...a little game.”
“What kind of game?” Jake asked suspiciously.
“Tag.”
Lucas narrowed his eyes. “We’re in public.”
“Exactly,” August said, smiling. “Only Elvis can tag with touches. No chasing. Whoever he touches the most by the end wins.”
Elvis tilted his head. “That’s cute…”
Thompson cracked his knuckles. “You’re on.”
What followed was a slow, awkward game of tag where every single boyfriend hovered near Elvis. When he picked a flower, Jake was at his side, grinning. When he sat on a bench, Lucas claimed the spot beside him. When he tied his shoe, Thompson bent to help. August timed each move perfectly to “bump into” Elvis with quiet, elegant grace.
And then—it happened.
Elvis, reaching to point out a butterfly to Jake, accidentally brushed his lips against Jake’s cheek.
Jake turned scarlet.
“Ohmygosh—didyoumeanthat???” he gasped.
Elvis gasped too. “I-I—no! I mean—yes!? I mean I didn’t mean to—!”
Jake dropped to his knees. “That was my first cheek kiss from you!! I’m gonna die happy!!”
Lucas stormed over. “You’re not dying. Get up.”
Thompson shoved Lucas. “That’s cheating!!”
August calmly handed Elvis a tissue. “You have pollen on your nose.”
Elvis shrieked and hid behind a bush.
---
RESULT: Four chaotic kiss attempts. Only Jake succeeded (accidentally). Emotional damage: widespread. Kisses: 0.5
The sun began to set as the group trudged back to Elvis’s dorm.
“Well, that was exhausting,” Thompson groaned.
“I almost had it,” Lucas muttered, rubbing his temples.
Jake held a flower Elvis had picked for him like it was a treasure.
August, still calm, walked silently beside Elvis.
And Elvis?
He held all their hands at once, somehow managing to squeeze in the middle, beaming.
“You guys are… so weird. But I had fun.”
The boys looked at each other.
And for one moment… just one… they all smiled at the same time.
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