my most precious thing in the world left me lonely too..

COVID 19 started.. that means lockdown started 😂😂.

I was happy... that I had my parents with me and my family.. I never told them about my life cause I never wanted them to take tension so I kept things to me only.. but I wanted a tone to know my feelings and all the problem I was facing... so I used to write dairy which was full of my problems and all..

so yes lockdown was started I was happy very much 😁😁.. but it didn't last long my parents started scolding me. I was okay with that cause they are my parents and they have right.. but then my parents started telling me that I am useless.. just trash, I should not live in this world.. my mind has nothing. I was cold-hearted.. really cold-hearted.. I always very helpful and think about others before me.. they said I was selfish.. I could not believe it. that sentence it was too much.. I was okay with that too.. then when mom was angry on some reason or somebody she would beat me to take out her frustration.. if I cried she said that I was doing drama.. so I stopped crying too. even if I was beaten by stick or ruler... my body was very strong and there were no marks when I was beaten up.. so no one would even have a idea.. I every day wrote my diary.. the school was closed so my friends would text me and tease me online.. I was fade up..and would get more hurt even more depressed sometimes tried to kill myself..

one day they crossed the line... as I told I used to write my diary.. my father read it he was very angry... he came and slapped me and than threw the diary.. I asked him he said that I was writing shit and nonsense... my heart that was so stabled got broken into pieces... he said that I should die.. I wanted to cry but for them it was only drama.. I hold myself and listen him shouting at me...he was beating me up but it was painless.. cause all I could feel was my heart was crashed.. all the things I was suffering was nonsense.. shit. I mean really why.. my parents didn't even cared... they just want productivity from me and they don't care what I am suffering to.. cause all that is shit to them.. after when they left I opened my diary and just did this...

this is my real diary.. I used to write in this after that incident I have stopped writing in it..

the one's who think this also fictional can see now.. I have this diary. .. cause it is given by my friend... I was so sad so hurted that I couldn't even hold my frustration.. from that day I learned never to tell my feelings to anyone.. cause I would br hurted.. that is why I say I have no one with me 😭😭😭😨😨😔😔

to be continue**d

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