Chapter 18 – A Choice Between Freedom & Love

The room was silent, except for the unsteady rhythm of my breathing.

I still held the key tightly in my palm, the sharp edges digging into my skin. It should have been a symbol of my escape, my freedom.

But Alexander had ruined that.

“Be mine.”

The words echoed in my head, twisting through my thoughts like poison.

I forced myself to take a step back. “You think I’d ever choose you over my freedom?”

Alexander didn’t react, his cold gaze fixed on me. But something in his posture changed—just slightly, so subtle that I almost missed it.

He was waiting.

For my next move.

For my decision.

My fingers clenched around the key as I turned toward the door again. The two guards were still there, standing like statues, their expressions unreadable.

I lifted my chin. “Move.”

They didn’t even blink.

I should have expected that.

I turned back to Alexander. “Call them off.”

He remained still, his expression unreadable. “And if I don’t?”

I glared at him. “Then I’ll fight my way out.”

A small, amused smile tugged at the corner of his lips. “You’d lose.”

Anger surged through me. “You don’t know that.”

He took a slow step toward me, his gaze locked onto mine. “I do.”

His confidence made me want to scream.

I could still try. I could use the element of surprise, I could—

I could fail.

And if I did, what then?

Would he punish me? Lock me away even tighter? Take away whatever small freedoms I had left?

My heart pounded as I looked at the key in my hand again.

Freedom.

It had been dangled in front of me like a cruel joke.

“Why are you doing this?” I whispered.

Alexander didn’t answer right away. He just stared at me for a long moment before finally speaking.

“Because I want to know what you’ll choose.”

I swallowed hard. “That’s not fair.”

His eyes darkened. “Life isn’t fair.”

I hated him.

I hated how he controlled everything. How he made me question myself. How he made me feel things I didn’t want to feel.

“Let me go,” I said, my voice shaking.

He tilted his head slightly. “And if I did… would you really leave?”

The answer should have been obvious.

Yes. Of course, I would leave.

But the words caught in my throat.

Because even now, after everything, I wasn’t sure.

And that terrified me.

Alexander stepped closer, his fingers brushing against my cheek. I flinched, but I didn’t pull away.

“You hate me,” he murmured. “I don’t blame you for that.”

I did. I had to.

He leaned in slightly, his breath warm against my skin. “But tell me, little one… when you think about leaving, does it make you feel relieved?”

I opened my mouth, but no words came out.

Because the truth—the awful, twisted truth—was that I didn’t know.

His hand slid down my arm, slow and deliberate. “Or does it make you feel lost?”

I squeezed my eyes shut. “Stop.”

“I will,” he said. “When you give me your answer.”

I couldn’t breathe.

I wanted to scream at him. To tell him that this wasn’t a choice, that he had stolen my freedom the moment he took me.

But deep down, I knew that wasn’t entirely true.

Because right now, in this moment…

I did have a choice.

And I didn’t know what to do with it.

-----

I gritted my teeth, my fingers tightening around the key as if it could somehow anchor me. My heartbeat thundered in my ears, drowning out the silence between us.

“Why are you doing this?” I asked again, my voice barely above a whisper.

Alexander exhaled slowly, like he was contemplating his answer. Then he spoke, his voice as calm and composed as ever.

“Because I need to know.”

“Know what?” My voice cracked.

He took another step forward. “If I let you go, will you ever come back?”

A cold shiver ran down my spine.

This wasn’t just about power. This wasn’t just about keeping me here.

Alexander wanted something from me. Something real. Something that went beyond possession.

And that realization was almost more terrifying than anything else.

I shook my head. “I don’t belong here. You kidnapped me, Alexander. You stole my life. What kind of question is that?”

His eyes darkened, but his expression remained unreadable. “It’s the only question that matters.”

I let out a bitter laugh. “You think if I stay, it means I want this? That I want you?”

He didn’t answer.

Instead, he reached out, fingers brushing lightly against my wrist.

I jolted back, my body reacting before my mind could. But the touch lingered in my skin like a ghost.

“Are you afraid of me?” he asked quietly.

“Yes,” I admitted.

His jaw tightened.

I should’ve left it at that. I should’ve let him believe it was just fear keeping me here.

But something inside me cracked.

“And I’m afraid of what I feel when I’m with you,” I whispered.

His eyes snapped to mine, something dangerous flickering beneath the surface.

Silence stretched between us, thick and suffocating.

Then, in a move so fast I barely registered it, he closed the distance between us.

I gasped as my back hit the wall, his body towering over mine.

“You don’t know what you’re saying,” he murmured.

“Don’t I?” I shot back. “You think I don’t notice how you look at me? How you hesitate sometimes? How you pretend you don’t care, but you do?”

His breathing was uneven now.

I had never seen him like this.

For the first time, Alexander looked unsteady.

I didn’t know what possessed me to reach up, to brush my fingers against his cheek. But the second I did, he grabbed my wrist, holding it firmly in place.

“This is a mistake,” he said, his voice strained.

I swallowed. “Then let me go.”

His grip tightened for just a second before he abruptly let me go. He took a step back, like he needed distance between us.

I sucked in a shaky breath. “You can’t keep me here forever.”

He turned away, running a hand through his hair. For once, he looked… conflicted.

“I know,” he muttered.

That one admission sent my heart racing.

He knew.

He knew this wasn’t sustainable. That keeping me locked away wouldn’t make me his.

But he also wasn’t ready to let me go.

I had never felt more trapped.

Not just by him.