Chapter 9: Unspoken Words

The morning after the wedding night arrived quietly, almost too quietly for Shiv’s comfort. The sun had risen early over the hills surrounding Siddapura, casting a golden glow over the village. It was a beautiful morning, but Shiv felt the weight of the previous night’s events pressing down on him. The kiss he had shared with Arundhati had been filled with a mixture of desire and confusion, and the feelings it had stirred within him left him unsettled.

He sat at the small wooden table in their room, running his fingers over the polished surface. His thoughts were still tangled, caught between the past and the present. Arundhati, young and full of hope, had offered him more than he could have ever expected—patience, understanding, and a quiet promise that she would be there for him, no matter how difficult things became. But how could he accept it when his heart still belonged to another woman?

As he sat lost in thought, he heard a soft knock on the door.

“Shiv?” Arundhati’s voice came through, her tone polite but hesitant. “It’s time for breakfast. Everyone is waiting downstairs.”

Shiv stood up, trying to shake off the lingering tension in his body. He didn’t know what to say to her, didn’t know how to face her after what had happened the night before. He had been distant, unsure, and Arundhati had been nothing but patient and kind. But that kindness only reminded him of how unprepared he was for this new chapter of his life.

He walked to the door and opened it to find her standing there, still in her bridal saree, though now with her hair carefully combed and her face free of the makeup from the wedding. She looked even younger in the soft morning light, almost like a girl who had just stepped into the world of adulthood, filled with hope and expectation.

“Good morning,” she said, her eyes meeting his with a quiet warmth.

Shiv nodded, though he didn’t know how to respond. He had never been good at expressing his emotions, especially when they were tangled with guilt and doubt. “Good morning,” he finally muttered.

Arundhati smiled gently, though her eyes held a trace of uncertainty. “Are you okay? You seemed distant last night.”

Shiv froze for a moment, unsure of how to answer. Should he tell her the truth? Should he confess that his heart was still haunted by the ghost of his past love? That he couldn’t fully give himself to her, no matter how beautiful and kind she was?

But as he looked at her—her innocent eyes, her soft expression, the promise of a life she was ready to build—he couldn’t bring himself to say the words. Instead, he simply nodded. “I’m fine. Just tired, I guess.”

Arundhati nodded, though there was a glimmer of doubt in her eyes. She didn’t believe him, but she didn’t press further. She knew Shiv was a man who carried burdens deep inside, a man who wasn’t ready to share everything with her yet. And she understood that. She had always understood the weight of responsibility, the duty that came with family and tradition.

“I’ll wait for you downstairs,” she said softly, taking a step back.

Shiv watched as she turned and walked away, her footsteps light and graceful. He felt a pang in his chest as he watched her go. How could he be so torn? How could he have married this beautiful, innocent woman, knowing that he was not ready to love her the way she deserved?

But as he followed her downstairs, a part of him knew that this was just the beginning of a long journey. He didn’t know what the future held, but he knew that he would have to make a choice eventually—whether to embrace the life he had chosen with Arundhati, or to continue chasing a shadow of the past that would only bring him more pain.

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Downstairs, the house was filled with the sounds of his family preparing for the day. His mother and aunt were busy in the kitchen, while his younger brother set the table for breakfast. The house felt warmer now, more alive, as the day’s routine began to take shape.

Arundhati was already sitting at the table when Shiv entered, her hands folded neatly in her lap. She looked up at him with a small smile, though there was a hint of nervousness in her expression. She had known that their first days of marriage would be difficult. But she had hoped that they would grow closer, that over time, Shiv would see her not just as a wife in name, but as a partner in life.

Shiv sat down opposite her, still feeling the awkwardness between them. He could tell that she was trying to be patient, to give him the space he needed, but he couldn’t shake the feeling that he was failing her. She deserved more than the man who was still haunted by his past.

Breakfast was quiet, the conversations around the table polite but strained. Shiv’s mind wandered as he ate, his thoughts drifting back to Ananya. He could still see her face in his mind, hear her laughter in the back of his mind. She had been his first love, the woman he had imagined spending his life with. But that was before the tragedy, before the pain of losing his father and taking on the mantle of village head. Now, he was married to Arundhati, a woman who had done nothing wrong but was caught in the wake of his unresolved emotions.

The day passed slowly, the unease between him and Arundhati hanging like a cloud over every moment. They did their best to avoid each other’s gaze, each lost in their own thoughts, neither one sure of how to bridge the gap between them.

As night fell, Shiv knew that things could not stay the way they were. He had to make a decision. He could not live a life split between two worlds—one of duty and tradition, and the other of lost love and longing. He had to either embrace the future with Arundhati or face a future of regret, always wondering what could have been.

But as he lay in bed that night, the silence of the house pressing down on him, he realized that it wasn’t just a matter of what he wanted—it was a matter of what was right. And in the quiet darkness, Shiv wondered if he would ever find the peace he so desperately needed.

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