The Hunt Begins: Ballroom Brawl in Disguise

The Hunt Begins: Ballroom Brawl in Disguise

The music had long since stopped, but the chaos in the ballroom was just starting.

Dante’s voice still echoed from the speakers as the guests scrambled—some eager to join the “hunt,” others desperate to stay out of the crossfire.

Kenji tilted his head, cracking his neck as he eyed the Sanji-parody assassin in sunglasses, who grinned while bouncing on his feet like a professional kickboxer.

Alexier, still clutching the torn remains of his once-elegant disguise, took a slow step back.

Alexier: “We should really be running.”

Kenji (grinning): “We should. But…”

The assassin lunged forward, a high kick slicing through the air. Kenji dodged effortlessly, letting the strike barely miss his nose.

Kenji: “...I kinda want to see how much of a bootleg ‘One Piece’ character this guy really is.”

The assassin smirked.

Kickboxer Assassin: “Big words, sailor boy.”

Meanwhile, another assassin—the insane doctor type, dressed in a pristine white suit with an unsettling smile—adjusted his surgical gloves.

Doctor Assassin: “Now, now. Don’t struggle too much, gentlemen. I have a lovely set of tools for you.”

He pulled out a syringe filled with a very suspicious-looking green liquid.

Alexier: “Oh, hell no.”

Before he could react, a sharp whoosh cut through the air—the femme fatale assassin (the Yor Forger parody) launched herself at him again, her dagger glinting under the chandelier lights.

Alexier barely twisted out of the way, but her blade nicked his cheek.

She landed smoothly, eyes gleaming with amusement.

Yor-Parody Assassin: “You’re quite good for someone in heels.”

Alexier glared.

Alexier: “I’M NOT SUPPOSED TO BE IN HEELS!”

Without thinking, he tore off the damn things and hurled them at her.

Kenji (watching mid-fight): “Alex, buddy… did you just weaponize your own shoes?”

Alexier ignored him, already lunging forward to counterattack.

Meanwhile… Yashiro’s Personal Problem

While the ballroom turned into a makeshift WWE ring, Yashiro was minding his own business.

He was not being hunted.

He was not engaged in combat.

He was not actively involved in the absolute stupidity happening near the dance floor.

Instead…

He had just been approached by a very drunk, very persistent VIP guest, who had mistaken him for one of the ship’s elite escorts.

Drunk VIP Lady: “Ohhh, you’re a fine one. Come, dance with me~.”

Yashiro stared blankly as the woman draped herself over him, giggling.

He sighed.

Yashiro (murmuring to himself): “I would rather be getting shot at right now.”

Drunk VIP Lady: “Oh, don’t be shy~ I’ll tip you handsomely.”

Yashiro side-eyed his earpiece.

Yashiro (whispering into comms): “Kenji, Alexier. Someone kill me.”

Kenji (dodging a kick mid-fight): “Can’t, buddy. Busy.”

Back to the Battle

The ballroom fight escalated as more hidden assassins revealed themselves among the guests. The "Bara-looking assassin", a massive tank of a man, had just cracked his knuckles and lifted an entire table like a weapon.

Alexier barely ducked as it sailed past him, crashing into the bar and sending expensive liquor flying everywhere.

Kenji sighed.

Kenji: “Alright, that’s it. No more playing.”

He ducked under another strike from the kickboxer assassin, then spun low, sweeping the man's legs out from under him.

The assassin hit the ground hard, but Kenji wasn't done. He immediately flipped onto him, pinning him down with an elbow to the throat.

Kenji: “You were fun. But I’ve got a date with your boss.”

One quick, precise jab to a pressure point—and the assassin was out cold.

Alexier, meanwhile, had successfully used a chair to fend off the dagger-wielding femme fatale.

She lunged again, but this time, he sidestepped perfectly and clotheslined her into a table.

Kenji blinked.

Kenji: “Was that a wrestling move?”

Alexier (panting): “I DON’T KNOW. IT JUST FELT RIGHT.”

Raven’s voice crackled in their earpieces.

Raven: “Idiots. Stop playing around. More security is on the way.”

Kenji: “On it, boss.”

Alexier wiped some sweat off his forehead.

Alexier: “Okay, let’s regroup before—”

He turned—**just in time to see the Bara-looking assassin charging at him like a human freight train.

Kenji swore.

Kenji: “MOVE—”

Too late.

The massive assassin scooped up Alexier, lifting him effortlessly over his shoulder like a damn sack of potatoes.

Alexier let out the most undignified sound.

Alexier: “PUT ME DOWN, YOU OVERGROWN—”

The assassin turned toward the ship’s grand staircase, clearly planning to haul Alexier off somewhere very bad.

Kenji groaned.

Kenji: “Oh, for the love of—DO NOT LET HIM BE KIDNAPPED. I WILL NEVER HEAR THE END OF IT.”

Raven sighed.

Raven: “Fix it, then. Quickly.”

The Great Alexier Escape (Or Not?)

Kenji was already moving the moment Alexier got snatched.

Kenji: “Oh, hell no—PUT MY BRIDE DOWN!”

The Bara-looking assassin barely spared him a glance, tightening his grip around Alexier and bolting up the grand staircase.

Meanwhile, Alexier was having a personal crisis.

Alexier (flailing): “WHO THE HELL JUST RUNS OFF WITH A FULL-GROWN MAN LIKE THIS?!”

Bara Assassin: “You’re worth a lot, pretty boy.”

Alexier (insulted): “DID YOU JUST OBJECTIFY ME WHILE KIDNAPPING ME?!”

The assassin smirked, clearly enjoying this way too much.

Kenji, sprinting after them, was torn between laughing and murdering someone.

Yashiro's Unexpected Hero Moment

On the other side of the ballroom, Yashiro was still actively dodging the drunk VIP lady’s attempts to grope him.

Drunk VIP Lady: “C’mon, handsome, just one little dance—”

Yashiro: “Ma’am, I’m on the clock.”

Drunk VIP Lady: “So am I. I paid for this cruise, and I demand service.”

Before Yashiro could politely (or violently) escape, the Bara assassin carrying Alexier BARGED RIGHT PAST THEM—knocking over everything in his path.

Unfortunately, that included Yashiro and the drunk VIP lady.

Yashiro: “Oh shi—”

The drunk woman faceplanted straight into a dessert cart.

Yashiro, having exceptional reflexes, twisted midair and LATCHED onto the Bara assassin’s back.

Alexier & Yashiro: Unintended Teamwork

Now, Alexier was being carried like a sack of flour, and Yashiro was clinging onto the assassin’s back like an unwanted backpack.

Yashiro (deadpan): “Well. This is humiliating.”

Alexier: “HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL?!”

Kenji, who was still giving chase, nearly collapsed from laughter.

Kenji (wheezing): “OH MY GOD. YASHIRO, ARE YOU GIVING HIM A HUG?!”

Yashiro sighed.

Yashiro: “Kenji, if you don’t stop this guy in the next ten seconds, I’m going to let him keep Alexier just to piss you off.”

Kenji finally got serious.

He leaped onto the staircase railing, using it to propel himself forward with inhuman speed.

Kenji’s ‘Heroic’ Rescue (with Extra Drama)

With perfect timing, Kenji launched himself through the air, kicking the Bara assassin straight in the face.

The assassin staggered but still wouldn’t let go of Alexier.

Alexier had HAD ENOUGH.

Using Yashiro as a step, Alexier hoisted himself up, swung his legs around the assassin’s neck—

—AND FLIPPED THEM BOTH OVER THE BALCONY RAILING.

OH SH*T MOMENT

Kenji (horrified): “ALEXIER, WHAT THE F—”

The assassin and Alexier PLUMMETED off the balcony, crashing through a lower-level buffet table.

Plates, food, and expensive wine exploded everywhere.

Silence.

Kenji & Yashiro: “…”

Then—

Alexier (groaning, covered in cake): “I hate my life.”

Kenji jumped down after him, landing with ease.

Kenji (mocking): “Well, that was an entrance. How’s the cake?”

Alexier threw a broken plate at him.

Meanwhile… Dante Watches from the Upper Deck

High above the ballroom, Dante was calmly sipping top-shelf wine, watching the absolute disaster unfold below.

One of his other assassins approached him.

Assassin: “Sir, should we intervene?”

Dante smirked.

Dante: “No. This is entertaining

Alexier, The “Pretty Disney Princess” (™)

The Bara assassin shoved Alexier down against the wrecked buffet table, holding him firmly in place.

Bara Assassin (grinning): “Well, well, well... My pretty Disney princess, I’ve caught you.”

Alexier (struggling, outraged): “WHAT THE HELL KIND OF NICKNAME IS THAT?!”

Kenji landed near them, rolling his shoulders.

Kenji (smirking): “Oi, let go of my bride.”

The Bara assassin slowly turned his head toward Kenji—his long, dark hair flipping dramatically in the air, sparkling under the chandelier lights like a shampoo commercial.

Kenji wasn’t prepared for that level of majestic hair physics.

Kenji’s Instant Regret

Before Kenji could react, the assassin moved faster than expected, swinging his head with full force—

AND SLAPPED KENJI ACROSS THE FACE WITH HIS HAIR.

Kenji (stunned): “…”

For a second, everything went silent.

Then Kenji felt something warm on his face.

Slowly, he touched his nose—his fingers came back red.

Kenji (dead serious, voice dangerously low): “…Did you just make me bleed with your HAIR?”

The Bara assassin smirked, flipping his hair again like a victorious peacock.

Bara Assassin: “I use only the finest hair treatments. Can you say the same?”

Kenji saw red.

Alexier, still pinned to the table, decided that this was absolutely not his fight anymore.

Alexier: “Kenji, I swear to God, if you start a HAIR BATTLE instead of saving me—”

Kenji was already cracking his knuckles.

Kenji: “You’re dead, Fabio.”

EPIC FIGHT: HAIR vs. FISTS

Will Kenji avenge his broken nose?

Kenji vs. The Undefeated Hair – The Final Battle

Kenji wiped the blood from his nose, glaring at the Bara assassin, who was smugly tossing his glorious, shampoo-commercial-tier hair.

Bara Assassin (smirking): "You can hit me all you want, but my beauty remains untouchable."

Kenji’s eyes flicked to the table.

Amidst the scattered food and shattered plates, a single pair of scissors lay next to a floral centerpiece.

Kenji (grinning dangerously): "Heh. Thanks, wedding decorators."

THE MOMENT OF HORROR

With zero hesitation, Kenji snatched the scissors, dodged a punch, and—

SNIP.

A chunk of the assassin’s long, flowing locks fluttered through the air in slow motion, like a tragic anime scene.

For a second, there was complete silence.

Then—

Bara Assassin (screaming, clutching his head): "M-MY HAIR?! MY BEAUTIFUL HAIR?! YOU MONSTER!!!"

Kenji twirled the cut strands between his fingers.

Kenji (mocking): "Oops. Did I just ruin your Pantene sponsorship?"

The Bara assassin dropped to his knees, eyes wide in sheer devastation.

Bara Assassin (whimpering): "Years… YEARS of growth… My identity… MY SOUL—"

Meanwhile, Alexier used the distraction to shove the guy off, rolling away.

Alexier (dusting himself off, deadpan): "This is the most dramatic takedown I’ve ever witnessed."

Bara Assassin’s Existential Crisis

The assassin was still frozen, staring at the cut strands in pure disbelief.

Bara Assassin (whispering): "…It was past my waist… I was finally living my bishounen dream… Why… why would you…?"

Kenji grinned, spinning the scissors like a weapon.

Kenji: "Well, Princess, should I give you a full trim?"

The assassin GASPED IN HORROR and immediately surrendered.

Alexier & Kenji’s Grand Escape

Kenji and Alexier took the opportunity to get the hell out of there, leaping over railings and dodging panicked security.

As they ran, Alexier threw Kenji a glare.

Alexier: "You could’ve just knocked him out, but no, you had to give him a meltdown."

Kenji (grinning): "Psychological warfare is part of the job."

Alexier: "You’re insane."

Kenji: "And you’re my favorite bridesmaid."

Alexier (murderous): "I WILL THROW YOU OFF THIS SHIP."

Meanwhile, the Bara assassin was still on the floor, cradling his lost hair like it was his firstborn child.

Bara Assassin (weeping): "My legacy… my beauty… my dreams…"

Mission Status: Partially Completed (with Bonus Hair Trauma)

Target still at large.

Kenji broke someone’s spirit more than their body.

Alexier has officially retired from wearing dresses. (Or has he?)

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