Six months

A stream of tears rolled down his cheeks, incapable of being held back even with all his exertions to not to shed any droplets of blues.

The once white sheet of paper was now completely ruined with scraped holes, ruined by the harsh clasping of the lamenting one.

The black roses-stitched handkerchief wiped away the cloudy haze, decorating his pale complexion with a delicate yet artificial smile.

“Noah... where exactly are you?”

The air carried his light mutterings, scattering the message to the atmosphere feigning its low timbres as part of the ecosystem.

His back was onto the dewy grasses of the field, bone protruding hands grasping the air as his mind wandered far and wide crossing over the boundary of his conscience.

Further than the petite hands could ever reach.

In his years of living, never once did he learn that the sky in the midday was able to portray such incredible shades of blue from down there where he stood.

For the very first time, the chirpings of the birds were as lovely as a hymn in his ears. No more of the nuisance from the bustling cities crammed with endless outcries.

The gentle breeze was startlingly fresh, clearer to breathe in contrasted with the unnatural air conditioning he made use of. Particularly during the scorching summers and heavy snowfalls.

Regrettably, this beautiful world was unable to be thoroughly discovered by him.

Prior to this moment, never had life been this peaceful where he's chased by workloads. All of which could be described as to never ceasing, not till the very end of all the livings.

Now that the limit was set, everything was indeed seen as a beautiful blessing...

.

.

.

“First destination, H City!”

Picking up the marker with scarlet inks, Luca drew a crooked little loop over the day's date in the diary he'd kept close to him. The lopsided red marking was meant to count his days as a wandering vagabond.

In more accuracy, it's an itinerant wanderer who'd abandoned his home for a reason that the majority would guffaw at him for.

The timer placed by his bedside rewrote a new digit as the count of the clock hit twelve of the night hour.

Six months was left.

A void that had rooted somewhere his heart twitched for a foreign reason he dared not conclude, from just a trivial glance at the innocent timer.

Despite his poor attempts at feigning the rainbows and sunshine, some profound sentiments still bound him to the sorrow of reality.

All was yet to free him from the weighing passions...

Shrugging at his thinkings, Luca switched off the lights, cutting off his only source of lights for his supposed bedtimes.

Not that he faithfully stick to this time planning.

He cuddled tight a worn-out coffee dipped teddy bear as he tugged the blanket to his upper torso to tuck himself to the freight train chugging towards the dreamland.

Luca tried to encaged his slowly fading warmth from escaping with the cold evening despite him having a heater turned on.

Still, the chill granted mercy to none and seeped into his bones with disregard towards his futile attempts at assuaging it.

Albeit both pairs of eyes basking the phosphenes, that resolute mind of his denied off his approval slumbering the physical exhaustion away.

In this stark darkness where his five senses were sealed, his hearing was honed to the peak of its height.

Enabled heed of his to each pulsing noise of the twilight whispers namely the punctual ticking of the clock enacting a digital lullaby that was accompanied by the night crickets cries fitfully.

In this bare darkness where no one was present, not a single soul was able to listen to his pathetic little wishing, an impulse had overtaken his usual rhythm.

The loosened mouth whispered in a low voice akin to a passing zephyr, “I wish to see you again even just once so that the rushing times would ultimately take a halt.”

Luca buried his head into the huggable teddy bear, cuddling it tighter and tighter with eyes squeezed shut as if he was unleashing an inexplicable load of the heart onto the lifeless doll.

If... if only was it that easy to cast away his secret senses of longing...

***

An hour had passed with the mint green ceilings witnessing clearly how his two eyelids had opened and closed, before opening and closing again.

At this rate, he's more than willing to latch his restive consciousness away in an illusionary box if that's what it took to nod off.

Luca's wide awake from being plagued by this insomnolent with not a wink of sleep obtained.

Pumped with the frustration, he rose from the four-poster queen-sized bed and fumbled around for the nightstand lamp switch to regain the absent lights earlier.

And with extra tedious care, he propped down the beloved teddy bear that went by the moniker of Mister Bliss, mindfully and attentively on the soft mattress.

In spite of the absence of the sun, noting visibly how it was midnight, the navy blue coat hung on the hook was grabbed along as he headed out the private lodging.

It was pitch dark outside.

The intimidating darkness naturally dominated over the street scenery, duskily illumined by the lamppost light.

Luca's breath fogged up the air, noting the rather low drop of the temperature in his surrounding as soon as his feet stepped outside of the accommodation. The nighttime played as part of the factor as well.

He paced the sidewalks, occasionally tracing the horizontal lines of the pavement to cool down his active train of thoughts with the bone-chilling night air.

Had his past self been to replace him on an evenfall stroll, one would call him out as some sort of life glitch or even perhaps a blessing pardoned by the Mighty One.

The outdoor leisure was the rarest type of leisure granted he'd preached as a luxury as more often than not, these aspects were basically out of the box, never to cross his mind.

An overall schedule of his life in simple summary consisted of work in the morning, work in the afternoon, work in the evening, work in the nighttime and sleeping at midnight.

He hated to admit it but he used to be that guy that's infatuated with his work life. Such a weird flex one wouldn't wish to possess.

The severity was to the extent that his coworkers labelled him as something even worse than a workaholic... the guy who was wedded to his work.

As if being known as someone whose spouse was his job wasn't bad enough, his colleagues didn't even bother to keep it a secret behind his back, not even in a roundabout way.

Not that he particularly minded such joke as it was intended for nought. At most, such occurrence made a decent topic to laugh at collectively during a gathering.

Luca's tense lips arched into a small beam.

To be honest... reflections resembling this did intensify his itching to return to those busy days of his, not that it possessed a special something although his current condition wasn't too bad either.

His platinum blond hair swayed lightly, helplessly being swept by the wind as Luca brooded.

The blue in his eyes that mirrored the gleam of a sapphire lept it gazes a spot to another before firmly spotting a roadsides store that offered twenty-four-seven services.

Giving the sideways glance down his stomach, the hunger broke out almost instantly as if it's been waiting all these moments for him to finally notice its petition for food.

Luca contemplated a bit before intending to coax his grumbling stomach with something from the store.

Before getting a move on, he felt around his pocket for his wallet, only then sighing of relief while grasping that valuable money case of his feeling assured.

Looked like he won't have to awkwardly stand in the store self-consciously smiling at the cashier with the already scanned products only to realise he had forgotten his wallet.

Indeed was one sticky situation he would have to patch onto which details totally was not speaking from his own experience... totally not.

Eyeing the lined up products, Luca specifically targeted for the fulfilling and easy to prepare one or in other words, instant food just to not waste his efforts struggling to consume the food due to his current inconvenience.

The least hassle the better.

After some deliberation and deep consideration, the instant porridges, two chunks of the energy bar and a few cans of tea beverages made their way to the finals.

Just one more concern before he finalised his choices. Could these purchases pass as healthy?

Rather than being healthy, phrasing it as decent was more than proper as certainly his choices weren't exactly bad. Well, disregarding the fact that it was instants and packaged meals, it was not that bad.

The deep questioning was all so that his dear uncertified mother would not turn into an other-worldly being after learning his messed up meals intakes.

God bless him was his ears were to reach this. A guillotine might be a greater passing to heaven alternative for him were that to happen, literarily speaking.

Eventually, with the finalised choices in hand, Luca walked to the counter still with the thoughts vigorously bouncing the edges and corners of his mind.

“Umm... excuse me, sir.”

The sales clerk intrusion yanked reality to the Luca who's still imagining the close-up views of a flying polished leather shoe that he only was able to witness with great details thanks to that irritable person he'd mentioned prior to this.

His needlessly excellent thinking came to an abrupt stop. Luca peeked from the corner of his eyes before tilting his head in that person's direction. “Yes?”

“Are you, Elouise Theodore, by chance?” His words thunderstruck him causing the pupils to distinctly widen in length. ‘How come...?’

Never had he foresaw for an actual person to recognise his faces. Even with this great distance from the place he had called home where he's quite known as he's not a popular celebrity that's locked in everyone's heart.

Although he's a public figure with a decent reputation, it usually came with little to no recognition.

His heart that beat to a frenzied rhythm pumped the blood in an urging motion, setting his anxiety to rest by the peak of its throne sky high.

Luca's focus was randomly directed at the cigarettes and tobacco boxes displayed on the shelves instead of directly facing the cashier that he's supposed to be talking to.

He lifted the corner of his lips into a rather strained smile with his fingertips fiddling the hard edge of the coat, shuffling almost nervously behind the sight of the latter.

No... don't look at me....don't!

His heart trembled, not with excitement but was troubled by this tension.

Stop with the expecting stares filled with things he dared not discover that were like staring deep into his soul, uncovering all the memories he refused to acknowledge.

The triggered memories churned the feelings he wished for no return.

The despair, the abhorrence, the detestation and the overwhelming feelings swooped him in a scoop, carving a layer of an impassive indifferent exterior to his broken pieces of mortal shells.

The undemanding simple question had pierced his every motion off to no struggle.

It's alright.

No more... it's nothing. Nothing at all...

“...I think you've got the wrong person. I'm sorry.” Luca smiled as he made his way out of the store with hands clenching down the paid foods that's placed in a plastic bag.

He slowed down his fast-paced walking, panting heavily acting as if he had run the track field three complete rounds when he's just a few feet away from the convenience store.

The adrenaline rush was real though.

His head was kneaded himself, messing his hair over and over again into a big lump of a mess before properly being slicked to the back again.

A sigh was heaved from the mouth that was still catching his breath, coming in aid to the small nose that was struggling to.

He called out on his carelessness when letting down his guards just because he's situated in a city farther than his original residence.

Like a criminal tiptoeing his toes around, on the lookout every second in fear of the authorities.

Although, his circumstance wasn't that severe to the point of altering identity and neither was he sneaking around for committing a crime of some sort.

All this effort put in was for the sake that he wouldn't be possibly tracked down by them who persistently insisted on his return.

Those people didn't only purely wish for his return, it was entirely something else that they sought for. Regardless of the risk of exposing himself, there's already no going back on this ultimate determination he'd planted his soul with.

Surely, it was a risky voyage, but definitely, definitely... it would be worth it, right...?

•To be continued...

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