bella's story/ pix values

Noveltoon is currently taking too long to give any value to writers. and I'm embarrassed to ask you this, but I'm going to ask It can be any amount if you can send it to my pix it will help a lot.

I'm asking because this way it can be easier for me to continue writing. If you don't want to, send it, don't worry. I will not be angry, and I will be grateful to those who send me.

here is the key to my pix:

b2ca0c37-b2d4-462a-9a11-6ecda43b29ef

If you can, thank you for reading my stories. I'm in need of paying household bills and I know that not everyone can afford it and I understand this but those who can and want to feel free

Bella's POV

ca. a day after Bella's 18th birthday party

She could have laid there in the woods for 2 minutes, 60 hours, a century, or even millennia. Looking back on it, there was no way to know how long she had been there. But it had felt like forever.

She just bathed in blackness. Floating in an infinite space. There was nothing. And at the same time, there was everything.

This space. This bubble. It was comfort. It kept her warm. Secure. It gave her everything that Edward had just so selfishly ripped away from her. She quickly cast the thought of Edward out of her mind. It hurt too much.

The sea of blackness brought a familiar comfort. Nothing could touch her in this void. Although, she had a far-off feeling that she was getting colder. But as fast as that thought penetrated her bubble, it floated away again.

Darkness. Floating. Ultimate peace.

She heard some faint noises. A metallic smell and sound cloaked her. But the darkness soon encompassed everything. Hovering between the nothingness, dreams, hopes, and memories came together.

Renee and Phil visited her. They were so close she could almost reach out to them. Her mom kneeled beside her and kissed her forehead.

“I am so proud of you my little Swan” she whispered softly into Bella's ear.

A bright light blinded Bella, and Phil and Renee disappeared as the honking teetered in her ears. She screamed. Bella's arms trashed around her to find the stability she so craved. To no avail, the dark returned. Instead of her mom, she now saw two graves in front of her.

Phil and Renee Dwyer. 1976 – 2011.

As if a dam had opened in her bubble, all the pain came rushing back. The throbbing. The surgeries. The rehab. And most of all, the solitude. It all ended with her transfer to Forks, she had not been able to find her footing, neither with her aunt nor in her old school. It was all just too much. Her whole body ached. Pounded. Then she heard her own quivering voice starting to beg "Please, please please please take the pain away”.

And then, the blackness returned. It swallowed her whole without mercy. And just like that, Bella was numb again.

Floating. Levitating over the forest, over the ocean. Across time and space. And then she returned to Forks.

She was outside of her father's house. Her house now, she mentally corrected herself. But not yet. Instead, she saw a very young version of herself, with two little pigtails, running towards the front door. Charlie picked her up, her tiny nose scrunching and calling out in glee, as in one swift movement spun her around and kissed her chubby little head.

“Bells, I love you so much”

Bella wanted to run to him. To feel his arms around her. To cry. She needed to get away; she needed to tear herself away from the dark. To get to Charlie. Just once, to be held by him once again. But as much as she tried, her efforts lead to no avail; Bella’s feet felt like they were cemented in concrete. There was nowhere to run. And as fast as the memory came, it disappeared again into smoke.

Black. Everything was black. No beginning. No end.

She saw snippets passing by above her. Angela. Jessica. Mike. Ben.

The laughter of Jake.

And then she saw him. Edward. She did not shake the thought away this time.

She walked towards him in the cafeteria. Edward stood up and looked at her. Taking her in from head to toe, with that half-crooked smile that she just loved so much.

Then, his face changed. His expression hardened, his eyebrows pressed together, and with a piercing gaze he whispered

“not worth it.”

Blackness

Everywhere blackness

No sounds. The commotion had died down. She sighed, as she let the darkness take her.

Had it been eons? Had it been seconds?

Bella wavered

Wandered

And wondered

Should she just give up?

Before she could answer her thoughts, one sentence pierced through the bubble, causing the black liquid to splatter apart around her.

“You are worth it.