My darling

Two years since I killed Lovely and Ridley has been quite peaceful, I wasn't harassed by her simps (Because they did not know I killed Ridley) and Lovely’s friends are sad now because she mysteriously disappeared.. Quite ironic that they never checked the place she loved the most, the garden. She was buried underneath those flowers she loves so much.. She made a grave mistake from trying to take my Henrietta away from me.. Speaking of my kitty..

I've been closer to her ever since those rumours spread that people shouldn't come close to Henrietta, because she reeks of death, the people such as Lovely, Kimberly, Ridley had all died and she was the person they last hung out with.. I guess that they started to notice that my victims had a pattern, anyone either mean or nice to my kitty either mysteriously vanished or just died painfully by the arms of death, so people avoid her entirely.

As I walk in the humid halls that is the asylum.. I heard whimpering. I followed the source and low and behold, it was from Henrietta.. Hugging her pretty porcelain doll, and she sat helplessly on the cold tile, her back slumped down and her bangs covered her eyes.. Her tears are like gentle rain drops that fell on the floor.. I approached her, gently tapping her. She looked up at me and I could see her face clearly, she was distressed. Her eyes looked so puffy and pitiful, her face was flush pink by her tears and stress, a whimpering mess

I love what I've done, it's so beautiful. I want to see her cry more

But I know that won't work in keeping her trust. I asked her

“Is there something wrong?” I had to keep my tone as reassuring as possible, she replied “Everyone I talk to.. Dies.. Now nobody wants.. Wa.. Wa.. W.. Want.. Want To..to..talk to me..” her sobs keeps her from speaking coherently, as she pauses mid sentence as she chokes in her own tears, so I had an idea to keep her on my side, while also keeping her unaware of the rumours for her sake.

“You're being paranoid and just overreacting, they just don't like you because of your ugly hair and your ugly eyes and your stupid hallucinations.” Henrietta cried even more so I added “But I don't think you're ugly” she looked at me with a glimmer of hope, as if I was different from those peasants around us “You do?” She looked at me with a mix of hope and doubt. So I said “Yes, it's true, you have very beautiful soft hair.. You should keep it long.. And your eyes are very colourful and pretty, it reminds me of a cat, it's very cute” I wiped her tears away. She smiled “You're a great person.. My parents always thought I was ugly” I had her wrapped around my little thumb, but I need more

“Hey, we're friends, and I barely know anything about you, how about we hang out and talk about ourselves?” Usually I didn't care about knowing more about the people I talked to, But she's so easy to lie to because of her schizophrenia, she needed someone to tell her what's real and what's not, which is why it's so perfect, I can use all of her vulnerability and flaws against her.

But this is for her own good, this is what love is, she said it herself nobody liked her.. So I'm doing her a favour by just existing, I'm perfect for her. She needs structure and discipline. People often do this so it must be normal.. Right? So we walked around the halls. It was humid but Kitty gave me a bottle of water “Where'd you get this?” she sheepishly replied “I stole it from the canteen.. The nurses always get the good stuff. ” “True..” I added before popping the lid and chugging it down my throat.

“Uhm.. I like crayons” I rolled my eyes “Did the wind ask you to say something?” her back slumped down as she darted her eyes away.. I wanted to groan but I had to say something “Fine, talk..” She didn't Say a word “Say something or I'll force you to shut up again.” She squeaked like a mouse in panic pursuit to find a topic to talk about..

I counted down “10…9…8…7….”

She was flushed with nervousness and embarrassment

“6…5…4…3…2….”

She suddenly blurted it out “What's your favourite colour?”

I feel like this bitch’s brain cell obviously burned out from all that panic and waiting only for.. That?.. But in order to keep her, I have to be gentle, SO I BREATHED calmly and said “I like pink and red..” She replied with “I like yellow and blue..” I sighed and grinned “Is that so?” she twiddled her fingers and nodded, I knew she was back to being uncomfortable.. So I devised a plan “So I want to know your hobbies too” she smiled again “Oh! I like to.. To.. Err.. To play with my doll, Antonia..” So I added “How cute, what else?” she was slowly starting to warm up to me “I can draw and.. And… And…Err…sing!”

“Can I hear it?” I said to her but she didn't want to. “I'm not sure..”

“I told you my favourite colour, why can't you sing?” She sheepishly replied with “I don't want to.. Not now.” I rolled my eyes at this bitch “I told you my favourite colour but you won't sing, that's being an ungrateful friend you know? It's bad” she squeaked in reply, this suggests to me that her love language is acts of service (basically being my little errand girl) , she wouldn't want her friend to sulk because of her.

As I expected she began to sing a lullaby.. It was very calming to listen to, the more I listened the more I nearly forgot what I was doing. Her voice sounded very similar to Lana del Rey except her voice is much higher pitched and softer in comparison to Lana's voice who had a deeper and soothing voice.. Her voice basically tingled and tickled my nerves in all the right places in my ears. I think the language in which she was singing was in..It's very close to Spanish, But it's not really Spanish.. It uses different words, some of it is Spanish.. I think? And it sounds very jolly upbeat.

The lyrics were..

Sitsiritsit, alibangbang

Salaginto't salagubang.

Ang babae sa lansangan

Kung gumiri'y parang tandang.

Santo Niño sa Pandacan

Puto seco sa tindahan

Kung ayaw kang magpautang

Uubusin ka ng langgam.

Mama, mama namamangka

Pasakayin yaring bata

Pagdating sa Maynila

Ipagpalit ng manika

Ale, aleng namamayong,

Pasukubin yaring sanggol

Pagdating sa Malabon,

Ipagpalit ng Bagoong.

“Did you like my voice?” When Henrietta finished, I answered “What language were you speaking in?” she quickly replied with “Tagalog..its a Philippine language..” “I see..” I replied to her. “I can also speak in French, Russian, and Korean.” I nodded gently “That's cool.. Can I hear you say hello In all the languages you learned?” Henrietta nodded and began to say hello in those languages in order.

So she's bilingual. That's not something I expected but ok? She seems more comfortable now, that's good… “Also I'm good at drawing” my face lit up a bit, I didn't know nor expect to have something in common with her “Me too, I draw too.” I added, “We should draw together sometime.”

“Cool..” She smiled sheepishly at me..I took a sip of the water in the bottle “Anyways, do you have-” I was cut mid sentence until Henrietta was called in by the nurse “Looks like it's my therapy time..” I genuinely wanted her to stay but.. I'll look like a fool, so I let her go. As I walked around the halls I overheard her name.. So I went closer, Inside the room was Nurse Belle and Doctor Vivien.. They had a conversation about.. Me..

“Doctor Vivien, Fred has shown to be more normal now and less prone to hallucinations. It was a pure miracle that his psychosis vanished” Doctor Vivien sighed “it didn't vanish Nurse Belle, it's simply treated. But he still has some screws loose in that head of his” Belle sounded confused" “But we did everything for that boy”

 Vivien said to her “You're right, but he has some major issues other than his psychosis Nurse Belle, even though his psychosis has been treated he's still traumatized by what happened in that house and still has phantom pain near the sensitive areas and groin, and he still hasn't moved passed that trauma, and he also has behavioural problems” Viven added “And not just the usual stuff that doesn't need to be in a mental hospital but still needs treatment such as Autism, ODD, nor Adhd and etc (he has none of the above). But the major stuff, he's exhibiting” She cleared her throat before adding “I meant the ‘kill animals for fun’ type of bad. It's serious, most kids who do this usually end up becoming a killer (I mean he already is one) but, know this because I work as a psychologist in prison. And if we ignore these traits, and let him out soon, these traits will grow and something bad will happen” she then added some more information “but-” Belle was cut off.

“He impaled a rat with a pencil, ass first with no remorse, we should not let that part of him fester.” Belle nods. “Well, what about Henrietta?” Vivien thinks “Over the past two years, Henrietta has shown some improvement. Her stuttering disorder has become less frequent, in fact entirely gone, her schizophrenia, like Fred is treated, she's less prone to hallucinations. And when she does, she'll just have to take her pills, and follow a routine.” Belle sighs in relief “So she's ready?” Vivien thinks before speaking

 “Kind of, unlike Fred. She isn't prone to having reckless behavior nor acts of violence.. She'll be outta here in two weeks and fly back to the Philippines, and away from that piece of shits that are her parents..” I felt my heart stop when she said that, their voices slowly muffled by the intense ringing I hear in my ears, all I could hear was She'll be gone in two weeks, it replayed in my head like a cassette tape, like an annoying song I can't stop listening to.. I felt my heart sink lower and lower..

"Nah, she won't. She'll be transferred to the Orphanage not so far off from here.. She has no other relatives other than her shit parents.." Another doctor added, who was sitting in the corner the entire time..

I've never thought I'd feel this feeling of… Loss.. ever since the woman who gave birth to me spread her urine on me.. That same feeling of loss and hopelessness and disgust.. I.. Two weeks.. I have to… I..

need to think

Of…

        Of…

               Of a….

                       I can't think straight.. Wait, I have two weeks to

                           Plan this Out I WON'T LET THEM TAKE THE ONLY GOOD THING IN THIS FUCKING WORLD AWAY FROM ME SHE'S MIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII—

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