Desperation: the Jinx

Chapter One: The Jinx

It has been weeks? Months? I don't… Remember 

Ever since the woman that gave birth to us has passed, I have been sent here to the County State’s Asylum. How boring and torturous it is. I couldn't fit in, some children make fun of me for not being made out of love but lust and force. Everyday at 7:30 I eat breakfast, after that at 9:30 am I go to group therapy and then at 11:30 is when lunch starts.. For the rest of the day. My therapist gives me pills to lessen my hallucinations. And I basically draw for the most part. After that tedious and boring day, I go to bed at 10 pm. And the cycle repeats, as I try to sleep, A stupid retarded rat came squeaking and making chewing noises, it sounded like wet, the upper and lower lip smacking against each other, the chewing sounded like a jackhammer pounding against a fragile wall, it's munching was getting slower and louder as it looked at me dead in the eye, I HATE IT. 

I stood up from my bed, and catched the rat before it could even think about running, I grabbed a nearby pencil and thrusting it inside the rat’s ass, all the way to the womb, it was hard because some intestines and bones got in the way, so I had to put the pencil out and push it back in as hard as I could causing more blood to spill all over the table, my hands, and my clothes, it wailed and whimpered, it only stopped making noises as I stabbed the heart. I pulled the pencil out, a nurse caught me in the act, she had a look that the woman who gave birth to me had…What was it called again? Her face was so pale that it could blend in with white walls, her pupils dilated and turned smaller than a bug, So I was forced to wear a straight jacket again. 

JUNE 20, 2014

I was in my room one day, and I saw a car. A woman threw a doll at a little girl and drove away. The little girl had blue hair, but that's all I could see, as I was all the way up in my room on the 10th floor. I was stuck in solitary for two days until a nurse came and I was allowed to roam around the Asylum once again. I attended another group therapy session and I get to see her up close now. She noticeably has long blue hair as I said before, a shy demeanour, fidgety behaviour, her eyes dart around the place nervously like a soldier looking for assassins, her eyes are a different colour, her right pupil is pink, the left is blue, just like a cat would have, about the topic of her eyes, she also has something in the eyes that is mostly common in cats, slits. She's as pale as a porcelain doll, and has pink rosy cheeks.. Wait.. Why am I overanalyzing her???? 

Oh wait.. Normal people wouldn't have blue hair.. Or.. Is it dyed? No.. If it was then her eyebrows wouldn't be blue as well.. Maybe she's sent here because she was an anomaly? How pathetic.. I have pink eyes, and nobody compliments my difference nor asks. Perhaps it's because of her cat-ish appearance? She does have slits on her eyes.. As I lost myself in her features, she waved at me with a sheepish smile on her face.. I turned my gaze away from her immediately after, I felt my face turning hotter.. What's wrong with me?!

 After the group therapy. I immediately went to the direction of the library, but I was forcefully grabbed by the shoulder. I turn to look and it was Ridley and her simps, that stupid blonde fucking whore, her impish smug makes me want to pluck her head out with my bare hands, or spilt her head in two by grabbing both her twintails and slowly rip her apart.. I genuinely don't know what's stopping me.. “ where are you going?”  Ridley asked me with a snide look on her face, she begins to push me around and her simps followed what she did, she pulls out scissors from out of nowhere, and her simps 

Grabbed me from behind, holding me in place, I struggled to break free, as soon as I was about to defend myself, we all heard a camera flashing, the perpetrator immediately ran off, causing Ridley and her goons to chase after her, I really was going to kill her.. But to be frank. I was going to lose, I walked towards the library, and as I soon got there, I heard a loud thump and metallic clanging as if dropped hard on the floor, so I checked. There, I saw a panting and wheezing girl, it was the blue girl, she had a camera with her, she sat down. 

Tired and exhausted, she noticed me, and waved awkwardly “ you saved me.. Didn't you?” I asked her, she nodded sheepishly “ I was able to g-get away from that b-b-blonde girl”  she muttered softly, seeing the open vent above, I could see how she managed to escape “ Why did you do that?? That's stupid, they'll know it's you”  The girl shrieks, the noise sounded like a kitty's meows, her eyes dilated the way a cat would.. “ She's… She's.. She's.. Errr.. Gonna-”  “ Yes, she is, and you're fucked”  I interrupt her mid sentence. 

“ I-I-It's Ok.. Uhm.. I sent it to a doctor.. So she's probably in solitary.. I hope…”  She twiddled her fingers nervously, as if she was unsure whether or not her plan was successful. I went towards her and bowed my head a bit to her height “ Answer my question first. Why did you do that?”  I studied her face for a bit, she wasn't keen on eye contact that's for sure, her constant shaking tells me that, one: she's very awkward; two: she's bad at lying; or-

 “I… I  didn't like it.. How she.. Treated you, she was so nice to me during.. Our.. Our…Our.. Our group therapy, but.. She was being.. Vile to you, and I happen to have a camera and I just.. Did it..” “Well, she won't be nice to you after this.” She interrupted my damn monologue.. But somehow, what she said touched me. My eyes feel like it's about to burst out of my eye socket and the optic nerves swirling around to turn into hearts with both my eyes combined and mushed together into one grotesque transformation into a beating heart. This was the only girl, that wasn't my sister, who was caring.. Who gave a shit, maybe it's because she didn't know me yet..But..I want to keep her. 

“Uhm… I'm Fred… Frederick Rosette” the girl replied to him “I'm Henri. Henri… Hen. He.. Henrietta Darling.” She smiled sheepishly at me. “Stop stuttering, it's annoying.” Henrietta bowed her head a bit “sorry!” I sighed at this… It's so pathetic it's painful to hear and watch. She sat down at the chair, her back leaning against the chair as she lazily took a book from the table beside her, she opened the book, as her fingers brushed against each page she turned, she was heavily hyper focused on reading it. It almost looked like she was in a trance, as if a siren's song was lulling her eyes to follow each word in the book the way she mumbled, is... This what people call… A crush? It's so nice, she saved me too, she's so nice… Whenever I looked at her, I feel like my spine would rip itself in half and twisting itself and rearranging my bones into a heart. I feel like I want to burst into confetti and reveal my beating heart. I feel like my brain is going to squish and churn until it's shaped like a heart. Wow. I LOVE THIS "Hey..." I said to her.

 I didn't know how to start conversing. Can feel my heart pound by milliseconds after milliseconds, it wanted to lead out of my chest… She looked at me curiosity and a sheepish expression... I could feel my hands twitch at my sides, so I hid my hands behind my back, maybe in the process I look cool? Like Elvis. I let out a chuckle, but I immediately regretted it, it sounded more like a hyena's cackle than a deep sexy bad boy, and she's starting to get more uncomfortable, her posture straightened and more tense, her eyes dart away to the left more than before her feet tapping to the floor, begging to move and walk away "H-Hey! I Have a… Uhh… Err… A joke" Henrietta smiles "I love jokes, please tell me! " She looked at me like a curious cat, her head tilting gently to the righ.. I could feel my restraint getting thinner and thinner…

"What city do you live in?" what the fuck did I just blurt out?!

"Uh... I used to live in the Philippines. And then to England. And now here, he-he, why?"

"Well, I wanna become a Philippine flag, will you be the blue to my red and make

 The sun and the stars together?"

I could hear. The crickets' judgment. There's no sound in the room… It was as silent, no. Even more silent than the solitary room. I could feel the room temperature drop, it's as if I'm turning to stone. I could feel my hair rise as well as the burning awkwardness in it all. Until I heard a gentle chuckle from her."hehe that's actually decent. " her face turned pink, she's more of a nervous wreck than before.. But mine was pinker, I could feel the embarrassment take over me.. My legs turned limp, my arms feel like noodles and I can barley feel anything other than my beating heart. I was supposed to make a joke not a cheesy pick up line!

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