Chapter 01: Suicide of a bride

...- Catherine's pov -...

It's been fifteen years, since I had a crush on Roland, though I once confessed my feelings to him, when I was in high-school, but all he said is that,

"I'm sorry, I only take you as my little sis, who I grew up with, I can't love you more than that"

his words, shattered my heart completely, it was a pain I never felt before

some people said that love is happiness, and that someone's first love is one's lifetime memorable happiness, but for me, all this was quite the opposite

and from that day, I chose to forget about him, ...but ended up failing in the end, it wasn't long when I realised that, my world can only revolve around him

So I intended to, love him in silence, hoping that he won't ever notice my growing feelings for him

And today, is the most important day to him, and the happiest, I could tell, by his sparkling eyes, how thrilled he is

But for me, it's the torturous day, of my life

 Because the man , am madly in love with, is marrying another woman,.. the woman he loves, right before my eyes

Well I am happy for him, cause unlike me, he managed to find the love of his life, and finally spend the rest of his life with her

Actually I attended the wedding, stupid right?, but it's the least I can do, supporting him on this path of happiness, by letting him be, some else's

Few minutes remain, for the wedding to start, I'm at some corner, cowardly hiding my tears, which rebelled my orders, and came out of my eyes

But I.. can't anymore, it's so damn hard ..that it's suffocating me

What if someone sees me, in this state?, what will I tell them?, am I in a wedding or a funeral?

As usual, being a coward I've always been, I ran out of the hall, to the rooftop, where I believe no else can see me, in such misery than, God himself

At last, I felt free, crying my pain out

But my eyes got an attention, at the edge of the rooftop, it was feminine figure, in a wedding dress

That can't be "Erica?" I found myself uttering unknowingly, and that's when, she turned around, meeting her face

It's really her, Erica, Roland's soon to be wife, but what is she even doing here, isn't she supposed to be..

"Little Rine, is that really you?" her eyes all teary, and I couldn't understand why

"ye..yes it's me" I responded, because that's how they usually call me, Roland and her, since they still see me as a little girl, of the past fifteen years, actually am not that young, Roland and her, are only two years ahead of me, and am twenty four now

"wh..what are you doing here Erica, you're supposed to be at the wedding, Roland must be looking for you every where, al..also get down from there it's dangerous"

I uttered taking a step forward, but

"no don't get close or I'll jump" she looked like she wasn't joking, but why..why would she do that, it's her wedding today, why does she want to kill herself?

"bu..but why, why you wanna kill yourself, it's your wedding day, and Roland.. loves you so much, so why you wanna do this?" I couldn't help but ask " did he do something bad, to you?"

"No, he didn't, ...he's never done anything bad to me, in fact he's really kind and loving to me, he ..has never hurt me"

"then why you want to do this? I asked in panick, taking another step forward

"I said don't get closer" she shouted

"okay, okay I won't, I promise" afraid she might really jump, I stood still

"you..won't understand, I just don't deserve him" saying this, tears fell from her eyes

"what do you mean?"

"Yes, I don't deserve him, ever since I was ten, I was raped by my stepfather, he came to my room, every night forcing himself on me, whenever mom was away, and until the day mom died, it's like he was justified to continue doing it, he did it so much that I even lost count, of how many times it has been"

I was so lost, on what she said, it was so much for me, to take it all in, the tears streamed down my face, is it pity or I was sympathetic towards her

"Rine, am not as pure as everyone thinks I am, that's why I don't deserve him, he's too good for me"

I never thought that, she was going through so much, she kept it all hidden in that bright smile of hers, I knew from the start, that her stepdad had something not right about him, but I never thought it was this worse, but why didn't she report him, nor tell anyone, for help, did he perhaps threatened her?

"but why now?, why you wanna do this now, on your wedding day?"

"he was right"

"what do you mean, Erica?"

" he came and told me that, I'm worthless, that I don't deserve Roland's love, that am not good enough to be his wife, that even if am married to Roland, he will still come to me, hunt me down, and ... do what he has always been doing to me, he said that I will only disgrace myself, if.. I'll marry Roland, and he's right about that, ...he is right"

"no, don't believe what he said, ..thats not true at all" I need to, find a way to help her get down first, before she really jumps

"I understand Erica, how hurt you are, if you'll explain it to Roland, he'll understand and finally get justice for you, there's no need, for you to end your life, get down from there please, think about Roland, what will he do if he loses you, do you think he'll survive the pain?, you know how much he loves you, so please live for him"

"that's why am living him in your hands, Rine ever since we were kids, you loved Roland, even now I can tell, by the way you look at him, that you still love him deeply, so please take good care of him, for me, tell him that I love him so much, tell him that, the days I was with him... he made me the happiest girl in the world, tell him that, am sorry.. for leaving so soon"

"no, no, no Erica don't do it"

"I'm leaving him in your hands, take good care of him" saying this, she let go of herself, and fell from the rooftop

"nooooo!" I tried rushing to the edge, but it was already too late, Erica was already on the ground

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