The Digital Loop

“Where are you going?”

“Out.”

“…”

He put on his watch and went out the door without looking to his wife. She simmered in anger. It was easy to tell where he was going.

Of course, she didn’t have the right to stop him. She could only protest every single time he left.

Life in the Red City was hard. Everything was decided.

Halbert was his name. A standard man of the evolved world. He knew love was limited. It was a scarce commodity these days.

Some might say that his actions were not justified. He was greedy. He broke the scared union a man and woman have in marriage. That would be true, if he had actually loved his wife to begin with.

Halbert was not the kind of man to quietly suffer for the sake of reputation. Besides, he knew that his flaws would only be judged upon by a force more rich and powerful than himself. He also knew that his heart was not evil so he had no need to fear.

Glancing at his watch, Halbert wondered if he would have time to pick up flowers. She liked flowers. She liked anything pretty. It made sense because she was beautiful. Beauty liked beauty.

Halbert stepped into a corridor and arrived at the other end of the city in seconds. Modern technology was now able to transport people to any place they wanted.

He wanted to go downtown.

***

Each step brought Halbert closer to his destination.

He awkwardly shifted his tie around his neck.

She was waiting. He was running late. Obviously, she would be annoyed with him and make him wait until she was appeased before she would even let him meet her.

Could be live a life without her? It was hard to say. Women in the Red City were cold and heartless like the machines that littered the city.

The downtown district of the Red City was known to be less advanced as the uptown. Inhabitants of the downtown district were somewhat more human it seemed.

Halbert suddenly realized how lucky he was to have a secret lover. She gave him a bit of happiness that he didn’t even know he needed.

He could hardly contain his smile.

Halbert walked up the stairs and then stopped cold.

Would she… even let him in? Halbert knew his lover was a temperamental creature. Easily upset. She might have locked him out of the studio just to burn him.

Then again…

Halbert started walking again and quickened his pace.

He arrived at the door and scanned his hand to the key lock. The door unlocked.

***

How many times had he done it?

Halbert had walked to this door too many times to count. He was accustomed to come to this exact spot, at this exact time, every month.

The second Thursday of each month at 5:30.

He felt no shame. His marriage was a mistake. He held no desire to be with a wife that bought him. She was a heiress that decided she would marry him because of his “natural human talent.”

Not many men were good looking and strong.

Some men ended up with biological advancements in order to meet the standard of “what men should be”.

Undoing his tie, Halbert noticed that she wasn’t sitting on the sofa. However, there was a plate of food on the table with freshly made dinner.

She knew him to well.

Halbert ate silently and reminisced.

She was such a composed woman. Stern. Quiet. Respected. It was hard to believe that she would have ever agreed to become his lover.

Of course, neither of them dared to cross the final line to seal their scandalous relationship. That would mean that she would end up thrown out of the Red City and left to die.

Halbert looked at the studio door.

She was waiting. He didn’t even have to guess. He knew she was there. He could feel it. She was waiting and rather patient today. It seems that she must have missed him too.

She missed him. Yes. Even this woman could yearn and yield for love.

A small smirk crossed his lips and Halbert was amused that this simple thought could make him this happy.

The clock on the mantle was the old fashioned ones with the two hands and the seconds hand. It ticked away.

It made Halbert conscious of the time he was missing. There was no extension in human life. In fact, most people didn’t live full lives.

He wasn’t going to make that mistake. He took off his watch and set it on the counter.

Halbert kept a pretense in front of people as most secret affairs go. His lover was an artist. She was a digital software painter to be exact.

As such, Halbert decided to become her subject. Their relationship was simple actually.

He sat before the artist and she painted him. Of course, the artist’s work could never be rushed, so it would take time before this painting was completed. It would take years by Halbert’s calculations. That was because she never drew one line of his face.

Halbert went into the studio and found his lover occupied with another man.

***

The streets of the Red City were always quiet. It was rather nice actually. Now it seemed to echo louder than ever before.

The streets were illuminated with a blue gray light. The walls were high so nothing could get in… or out.

Halbert felt his heart raising a barrier between love and reality. It was the right thing to do now. He had to protect himself for ever making another mistake like this ever again.

He was a scorned lover and terrible husband and now… a lonely man. How pathetic! Halbert wanted to rip something in half. He wanted to fight a losing battle until he was close to his death. He wanted to erase his memories…

Halbert was sitting in an alleyway holding his watch. He could hear the seconds ticking away.

All that time he spent with his so-called lover was in vain. What he thought to have been a beautiful relationship was actually his delusional dream.

No one loved in the Red City. They had and they wanted and they took. No marriage came from love or passion. It came from greed. A pure romance could never survive here. A true love was nonexistent.

Halbert laughed.

He refused to go home to his wife though. She would laugh at his foolishness and take pride in his pain.

All that was left for him to do was return to his world and continue his life.

Suddenly Halbert felt drained.

What would a real romance even feel like? Would he ever know? No. It was impossible. Love was dream for a hopeless romantic.

Halbert stood up and began to wander the street with a grim expression.

Deep down Halbert knew, he was the biggest and most hopeless of them all.

***

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