Chapter 1. Just give me something

Some days I want to get better. Some days I want to stop cutting white powder into sections and ruining my life with each inhale of it, but I know that no matter how hard I try, all the years worth of pills and powder crushed into my brain won’t go away. I’ll just run right back to it the minute things get hard. The minute I think of my boyfriends death. The minute I remember my mother packing her bags and leaving, and even surprisingly enough, the minute I realize I have a 50 page essay on the affects of the Soviet Union due in 3 hours. All of it, it’s all enough to set me off. Some days I really do want to quit, quit stealing stuff from my dad in order to get money, or even stealing from my friends when the urge to get high really hits. But like I mentioned earlier, it always comes back, it’s my demon.

Day 1 of senior year -

“Lev?” “Here.” I reply in a stern voice to the new nervous looking proffesor. He’s cute, about 25, long blonde hair tucked behind his ear on one side and hanging lazily on the other. I shake my head at the intrusive thoughts rioting in my mind as to get rid of them. “Snap back, come on Lev, Just get through the day.” I tell myself, I would be a lot happier if I knew I had my drugs to come home to, but I’m low on money since I lost my job at the school cafe for “being rude to customers” whatever that means. So instead of focusing, I spend the day thinking about how to get my drugs, how I will stay away from reality. But my drug dealer,Aawut, he stopped selling to me weeks ago, said he wasn’t putting up with my gay bulls$h!t. I mean, how can I resist a 6 foot 6 beauty who I talked to practically everyday? He had come all the way from Thailand just to be with his stupid girlfriend 😩. I thought maybe in a way I could have him for myself, but never in eternity would it happen. He was straight and 34 years old. Before he stopped selling to me, he said these words I remember exactly. “ look kid… I see you falling apart from what I’m giving you, while you do help my income, I know this is dirty money and I don’t want it. I also happen to think that you are too thirsty. You need to chill on all the pickup lines and start focusing on your life, I truly want what’s best for you Lev, but I’m sorry, I’m not interested. Good luck.” His words hurt, but even to this day I still think about him, my major crush on him still exists but I’m too upset with him, all I needed was my drugs and now I’d have to find someone new. Someone hopefully less hot.

Lunch break- 12:07pm.

I jumped up from my seat as the bell rang for lunch. My head was heavy and I couldn’t see clearly. Ever since Aawut had left me, I’ve been going through withdrawals and being at school made it ten times harder. As I walk down the stairs everyone passes me and it’s all a blur. It’s like someone is controlling my body and I’m just watching from the sky, completely disacosiated. Most days I skip lunch, I just hang out in the bathroom, but today I need fresh air so im going outside. As I push the doors open and head down the steps, someone pushes me down and I fall almost 5 meters to the ground. I winse in pain, but a tall dark shadow covers me. The next thing I know, a rough and Callased hand is pulling me up and dragging my quickly to the back of the school where no one goes. For a reason. It all happens to fast and once we stop I finally open my eyes. A tall man, maybe a few inches shorter than Aawut stands over me, he’s got dirty blonde hair, freshly cut on the sides and messy on the top, his face is smooth and shaved, he wears a black trench coat and high combat boots with khaki pants. “ who- who are you?” I ask, shocked by this random encounter. “ names Maxim.” He says, with a slight smile, revealing his perfectly white vampire fang teeth. No way. This can’t be. It hits me, this is Russias most wanted drug dealer and he’s standing right in front of me. AT MY SCHOOL. WHAT?!?! “ what do you want from me?…” I ask concerned. I’m more scared than I am appalled by his stunning appearance. I’ve only seen him a million times on several wanted posters. “Aawut gave me your info, he said you’re interested in the rich people drug huh?” He smiles, I can feel myself blush. God he’s so cute. “Cocaine yes…” “ what a shame, you young people really are messing your lives up.” His smile fades. And for the first time in a long time I feel a little guilty. “ you know Aawut?” “Of course I do, he said he doesn’t want to be involved in your purchases, but he felt bad for leaving, so he told me about a possible customer. Listen Lev, I am a man of business and id be happy to offer you some deals. I am also looking for an assistant, I’ll offer you a discount in exchange for helping me out.” I gulp. This is happening so fast and I’m not sure what to say. Do I help him? A discount sounds auwfully nice, but he’s on the run and wanted. I mean… I have nothing else to loose. I nod, breathing heavily. “ I’ll do it.” I say desperately. And he pulls me off the ground.

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