His perfect doll

Made by: Angel O

Mr Big never said much about himself, not his family nor his age not even his real name so I took it upon myself to believe his about 30 or so he looked that way to me. He was truly filled with secrets, I had to know him for a whole 3 years before I found out he had a torture room. At the age of 18 I saw how cruel he could be, he invited me to this room and told me to watch carefully what happens to the people who betray him, the whole site was irritating I could see old blood stains from former victims, some of their remaining parts as well it was obvious his men didn't border cleaning up when their through. But watching as they brutally tortured the man I started remembering my past and what happened to my mum unconsciously I cried I cried silently, I was so out of shape to pay attention if Biggie(nick name I call Mr Big) noticed me but it seemed like he didn't because he later came to me after the whole thing and applauded me for not making a fuss about things, from that day I accompanied him there regularly and believe me it was torture each time.

One day after we were done drinking and waisting our night doing nothing but partying he asked for a one on one game of 'blackjack' since i've been watching him play I did well and he also seemed impressed so he kept on teaching me different techniques in different games daily and surprisingly soon I surpassed him, it was then he started calling me "his perfect doll". I began to represent him, doing all his matches for him ,I knew this was what I'm meant to be, 'since I wasn't good at anything else this will be my life' ,atleast before I occasionally thought about my future but now I know there's no turning back, I was now officially a gambler.

I thought all I needed was love from the man who gave me meaning and made me smile, love from the games he introduced me to, entertainment from my everyday life but at 20 I became pregnant with Biggie's child. I somehow knew this day will come I think we all knew but chose to keep messing around, oddly enough I felt unsure to tell him the news, why? Well because once in the past I brought up the topic and he didn't take it too likely, he clearly and strictly told me that one day if I ever had a child he would abandon me, but that was when I was not useful to him, when I was 17, a age I couldn't contribute anything to him so I mustered up the courage and told him but he did something I never taught he would. He locked me up, at first he made me choose between aborting the child or loosing favour with him and considering my past I just couldn't loose my child and just like that I became his prisoner only brought out to do his games and fill his desire which was I guess his way of killing my unborn child.

I didn't complain, I felt I didn't have the right to but I did become my old pathetic self, not being able to talk or show emotion just having the same depressing look and doing exactly what I was told to like a slave, a doll. I guess being called the Perfect doll suits me well.

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