chapter 5

Listen to my heartbeat 

It calls you whenever it want to”

Jungkook decided to stay on the night shift, and to be there for Taehyung, even if meant jeopardizing his relationship. If Emma couldn’t understand, then he didn’t want to be with her. It was different to see the pain of the young boy and watch him struggle alone in hospital. Emma on the other hand had her whole life ahead of her, to be free and do what she pleases. Taehyung did not. His heart grew for him and now he was going to try little by little to help him out.

Jungkook waited for Emma to wake up to tell her the bad news. Deep down inside he hoped she was okay with it. He really did love her, and for her to walk away would really break his heart, but he already made up his mind. Jungkook dozed off while waiting, and was woken up by Emma.

“Don’t you have to wake up? It’s almost time for you to go in.” Emma said as she walked around the room getting ready for her job. “I was so happy when you walked inside super early! I love being with you whenever I could.”

“I decided to stay on the night shift,” Jungkook said sitting up. He rubbed his eyes and watch her freeze in her tracks.

“You what? You decided to stay?” Emma scoffed and crossed her arms. “For that crazy boy?”

Jungkook sighed, “He’s troubled. He needs me. For whatever reason that is, I want to help! The only thing he has is his doll to talk to!”

“His doll? How old is this boy, five? How can you help a small child?? You’re not a doctor Jungkook! You’re a fuckin' janitor!” Emma didn’t mean to throw that in his face, but he needed to wake up to reality and realize he couldn’t do anything for him.

Jungkook on the other hand took a deep breath and counted to three. Sure he was just a ‘fuckin' janitor’, but this job was going to pay bills and supply their wants as well. “He’s eighteen, not five an-“

“An eighteen year old talking to a fucking doll??? Are you fucking kidding me right now? He’s crazy!! Who the **** in their right mind talks to dolls??” Emma paced the room and was just blown away, by all the news.

Jungkook was already get fed up. “He’s been in the hospital since he was fifteen! There has to be a reason for his doll! It could be his sense of comfort! For fucks sake Emma, just look at the bigger picture!!! He wants me to be around him! He feels safe with me, and honestly…I enjoy his company. Yes, he acts out, but overall, it’s nice to have him around!”

“You like him or what?” Emma was already about to cry, but she didn’t want to cry right now, so he held it in.

“What? You’re joking right?” Jungkook was waiting for her to say ‘Just kidding!’ or something along the lines, but didn’t say anything. Jungkook threw off the comforter and got off the bed. “I see him like a little brother! Like a friend! I-I can’t believe the shit that runs through your head!” Jungkook was getting a headache thinking about all of it, and decided just to throw in the towel. “I’m going to stay with him. If you want to be with me, then please accept that. If not…then I’m sorry.”

Emma couldn’t contain her sadness, as she began to cry out loud. “Are you r-really wanting to break up with m-me over a guy who talks to a d-doll? S-seriously?”

“Em, it’s just not about a guy! He’s never seen the outside in over three years! He’s traps himself in a secluded room! That’s enough to drive anyone mad! If you just met him and saw how broken he was, I bet even you would want to try to do what you could!”

“YOU’RE NOT A DOCTOR! What don’t you understand??? If they can’t fix him, you really think you could? You can’t!!” said Emma as she dropped to the edge of the bed and cried more.

Jungkook put his hands behind his head and breathed in deeply. “Listen Em. I know I’m not a doctor, but he wants me around more than the doctors or nurses. Maybe he’ll open up to me little by little. That’s all I can do for him, right now.”

Emma got up and wiped her face. “Fine. If you want to help a loony eighteen year old who talks to dolls like the crazy person that his is, **** you and **** him. Both of you can go to hell together.” Emma grabbed her keys and turned to Jungkook and said, “I’ll be packing up my shit after work. If is what you want, then this is what you get.” Emma slammed the door and took off to work.

Jungkook got back in bed and covered himself up. He rubbed his temples and was in need of more sleep. His head was just bouncing everywhere that he couldn’t concentrate on anything else. He was going to miss, Emma though. He wasn’t sure if the decision he made was the right one, but it was the one he wasn’t going to regret.

Jungkook was at work that night and Jimin gave him a thumbs up for staying on the shift. Jungkook was happy also, he felt like this was where he did belong…well, without the other patients though. He looked up at the lighting and knew he had to fix most of them. He was going to wait until that night, since he wasn’t going to trust the patients around him with a ladder. Instead he went to stock up all the toilet paper in each room as well as fill their soap dispensers.

He grabbed his stuff and made his way back to the first hall. He walked in the first room and opened the restroom door with gloves on his hands. He was about add a roll of toilet paper, but heard Jimin speak to him.

“Don’t put new toilet paper in this one. Let her finish what she has. Last night, she thought she could commit suicide by hanging herself from her door knob with toilet paper. She wasted just about the whole roll, as you could tell,” Jimin said as he pointed to the nearly empty roll.

Jungkook was about to say something, but kept it in. Not everyone was in their right mind in the hospital. “Oh okay…thanks for the heads up!”

Jimin winked at Jungkook and took off back into the hallways. Jungkook changed the soap dispenser and made sure it worked properly before leaving to do the next restroom. He left the first room and made his way down each door, almost done with the first hall. Jungkook was turning the corner to the second hall and saw a couple making out with their gowns off thrown on the floor just a few feet away from them. Jungkook was checking to see where the nurses or doctors were in the hall, but it was so crowded he couldn’t see them. He tried to move past them, since they were stuck dab in the middle of the hall.

Jungkook cleared his throat to move past them, but they grunted and the male pushed him back, making him stumble with his cart. Jungkook went back to trying to pass again, but more with more force since no one was willing to move and he just wanted to finish his job, that’s it. Again, the guy grunted, but this time the lady pulled away and starting kissing Jungkook all over the side of his face. He felt the old lady’s tongue lapping on his cheek and down his neck. He pushed her away, and almost hit her, until he had to think for a second where he was at. He wiped himself off and was completely caught off guard as the male punched him straight on the jaw.

Jungkook fell down and tried to recover, but the ***** male got on top of him and began to punch his face with full force, causing Jungkook to cry out in agony. Now, the man was not small, not by a long shot, he was much taller and bigger than Jungkook, that even he couldn’t take him on. Jungkook covered his face the best he could to avoid getting hit anymore.

Finally after what seemed forever, Yoongi and Jimin grabbed the guy and pulled him off of Jungkook. The patient began to get violent with the nurses, but Hoseok came pushing through the crowd with a needle in his hand and injected the patient with a tranquilizer. Yoongi and Jimin were out of breath as they tried to hold up the heavy man. They apologized to Jungkook, and left to take the patient to his room.

Hoseok helped Jungkook up and took him to the staff room to wash him up, so he could apply antibiotic cream on his wounds he had on his face. “Sit,” Hoseok commanded as he went to the first aid kit. “Sorry, you had to go through that. I swear, it’s like today is a full moon or something. Everyone has been acting out, and it’s a little overwhelming to jump from one place to another to be honest.

Jungkook touched his busted lip and winced. It hurt like a motherfucker. “I’m sure it gets overwhelming. I just can’t believe I got licked, and got my *** kicked.” Jungkook thought of the old lady and groaned. “Let me go wash my face, I don’t want this licking wet shit to linger any longer.”

Hoseok laughed and excused him. He walked to the staff restroom that could only be open with a key and quickly entered before he had another run in with some other patient. He walked in the restroom and saw his face in the mirror. The patient did a good number on him. He ran his hands along the side of his face of the swelling and bruising that were starting to show. He grimaced as he thought back again to the lady and her slobbering all over him. He got the soap and washed his hands first then began to wash his face three times, just to be sure he got every single grossness off of him.

He went back to the staff room feeling more refreshed and sat down next to Hoseok who had everything waiting for him. He began to apply the medication on Jungook and continued to apologize to him. Hoseok knew this job wasn’t going to be easy for anyone, but was proud of Jungkook for even trying to stick it out.

After everyone went into their rooms he began to wax the floors that seemed to go by pretty fast. He was surprised even after walking up and down the third hall earlier from cleaning, he didn’t see Taehyung once. He was sure he thought that Jungkook wasn’t going to be working at night anyways. Jungkook smiled and couldn’t wait to see him again. He tried to hurry up so he could reach the third floor.

Still nothing. He passed by a couple of times and even lingered by the door to get his attention, but still no sight of him. He looked side to side down the hall and was glad no one was there. He crept up to Taehyung’s room and peeked his head in the small hole that was dark. He squinted his eyes and saw his friend sleeping with his back facing him. Jungkook frowned. He was debating if he should wake him up just to surprise him or leave him to sleep.

**** it. He missed the boy and wanted him by his side like always. Again, he looked down the halls just to double check if anyone was going to turn down the halls. He was in the clear so he tapped on the small window and saw Taehyung move about on the bed, but refused to turn around. Jungkook bit his lip and thought it through on how he was actually going to get his attention.

“Psst…PSST!” he said as he tapped a bit louder on the window. Then it snapped to him, the door should be unlocked. He slowly turned the knob and peeked his head in, before fully entering just in case Taehyung was not himself tonight. The boy laid still and Jungkook made his way into his room, slowing tip toeing up to him. He leaned down next to the boy and laid his head down next to Taehyung’s head. He wanted to reach out and touch his hair, since it looked so soft, but decided against and laid still just staring at it.

“I’m back,” Jungkook whispered. “I won’t leave you again.” He was took a big chance again on talking to him, but he wanted to learn to communicate with the younger boy, even if meant earning a punch. He was going to try his best to help him, and he was going to do whatever it took.

Taehyung snapped his eyes open and sat up straight. He looked down to see Jungkook looking at the wall with a smile on his face. Taehyung made a small whine and could already feel the tears take over his eyes. He saw Jungkook laying his head only on his bed in a very awkward position, but it seemed the janitor didn’t care. Taehyung smiled then frowned at the sight of his friend’s face. Taehyung slowly laid back down with his head very close to Jungkook’s. “Thank you,” Taehyung whispered back. He placed his doll under his chin and shyly giggled as he and Jungkook were just inches apart from each other. Taehyung smiled even more when Jungkook spoke to him, it caused butterflies in his tummy that made him feel really good.

“Don’t hurt me when I talk to you…please. Let me know what you don’t like me to say, and I won’t say it. I promise I won’t look you in the eyes either, I’ll wait on that. Also, touching you…I’ll wait.

Taehyung smiled and covered his face with his doll and shyly said, “Why would you want to touch me?”

Jungkook chuckled. “In case I need you to help you with anything. I don’t want to see you hurting yourself, and I feel hopeless that I can’t lay a hand on you. And also….if ever you need a hug or something, you know?” Jungkook got up of the bed, and looked around the room, then let out an awkward cough.

“Okay,” Taehyung said as his cheeks turned pink.

Jungkook looked at Taehyung who was also getting up and said, “Please don’t tell anyone I spoke to you. You snitched on me the last time, and I almost got in trouble. Please don’t tell or I’m afraid I won’t talk to you again.”

Taehyung made his eyes big and squeezed his baby doll, “I promise. I can’t lose you either.”

Jungkook still didn’t know what he meant by that, but little by little he was going to ask questions and try to help him out. His parents probably left him for good or something and it was an issue he was having within himself. Jungkook quickly glanced to Taehyung and saw him gnawing on his lower lip. “Come on, I have to finish up.”

Jungkook went back to waxing the floor with Taehyung trailing behind him. “You missed a spot,” Taehyung giggled. Jungkook smirked and said, “Did you want to try it then?”

Taehyung nodded his head quickly and smiled widely. He’s never done anything like this, and he was already excited about trying something so new. Jungkook wanted to laugh at his childish behavior, but didn’t want to upset him. “Okay, it’s very easy…but first, let’s put gloves on your hands.” Jungkook got an extra set out and handed them to Taehyung. Taehyung looked at his baby and looked to Jungkook. “I’ll hold her for you if you want,” Jungkook said, holding his hands out.

Taehyung smiled and gave him his baby. “Okay, so get this flat mop out of the bucket and that’s it. Just move it from side to side.” Taehyung did what he was told and laughed when Jungkook praised him for doing a job well done. Taehyung was really proud of himself. He did more than half the hallway on the fourth floor, then Jungkook took over before he would get in trouble.

“Do you like being a janitor, Kookie?” Taehyung asked staying close to him.

“Yeah, I guess. The pay is good, so what can I really complain about?” Jungkook was also glad to take on the job, since he met Taehyung.

“Hmm. So what happened to your face? Are you okay?” Taehyung stopped walking and turned to face Jungkook. Jungkook hung his head down and nodded. Taehyung studied Jungkook’s face. “Look at me.”

Jungkook shook his head. He didn’t want to do so much in one day with Taehyung since he didn’t want him to freak out at the suddenness of anything.

“Please look at me Kookie. I’ll behave. I promise…” Taehyung waited and kept trying to make Jungkook look at him in the eyes. Jungkook didn’t budge at all and kept avoiding his gaze. Taehyung placed a hand on Jungkook’s face and that snapped him to stare at the young boy. Taehyung leaned forward and placed a kiss on his cut, on the side of his lip.

Jungkook moved back and looked at him in shock. Did Taehyung just kiss him? He touched his busted lip not believing it.

Taehyung smiled sadly at him and said, “My mom used to kiss my pain away, when I was hurt…”

“You’re mom?...What happened to her?” Jungkook asked. He now knew the kiss was as innocent as he was. It was something that he learned to do.

“My mom?..” Taehyung began to hyperventilate and suddenly felt he couldn’t breathe anymore. He tried gasping for air as he felt his body go numb and his heart pounding against his chest, like if it was going to pop out of his chest. Taehyung felt his world began to spin as he thought he was going to die.

“Taehyung?? Taehyung?? Breathe!! Tae!!!” Jungkook laid the boy down and grabbed a paper bag that was underneath plastic bags. “Breathe in here!” He placed the bag over Taehyung’s mouth and watched his eyes roll back as he tried to get control of himself.

“Please Taehyung….breathe…that’s it…breathe.” Jungkook watched Taehyung breathing slowly going back to normal and hugged Taehyung closer to his body. He began rocking him like a little kid, and Taehyung became even more relaxed. “I’ll take you to your room.”

Jungkook prayed no one would spot him as he picked up Taehyung bridal style and carried him to his room. He laid down the boy and tucked him in bed patting his back. Jungkook tried putting him back to sleep when he felt a hand on his. Jungkook cupped Taehyung’s hand immediately to comfort him.

“I’m sorry Kookie,” Taehyung said sleepily.

“Shhh, go to bed. It’s okay. It’s my fault I asked you…I was stupid.” Jungkook wanted to kick himself. And he wanted to kick himself even harder for laying a hand on the boy, but no one was around to help him, so he would count it as a lifesaving excuse. He continued to comfort Taehyung, and watched him fall more slowly drifting off to sleep. “You’ll be okay…shhh…you’ll be fine.”

“I…I didn’t mean to kill her…” Taehyung whispered, before his body went into a deep sleep.

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