CHAPTER 14

In response to Fu Changling's words, Qin Yan didn't pursue the identity of the other person but simply asked, "Are you sure?"

"Yes," Fu Changling nodded, "don't worry, he's a good person."

Hearing this made Qin Yan frown as if he wanted to ask something, but he ultimately withdrew all of his questions.

They both made their way back to the Wu Mansion, and neither of them said a word.

In his mind, Fu Changling kept thinking of the face of the person he had just seen and of those eyes.

It was uncannily similar to the Yan Ming he had dreamed of as a teenager.

He was aware that Yan Ming was in the secret realm, but he didn't have high hopes either. After all, he had been reborn, so perhaps some things would change in this new life. Little did he know that Yan Ming would really still be there or that he would actually run into him.

The encounter with Yan Ming again caused him some emotional turmoil, so when he got back to the Wu Mansion, he bid Qin Yan good night, put out the light, and went to bed early. Each to his own bed.

Yet he didn't doze off. In the middle of the night, while listening to Qin Yan's breathing, he took out the jade pendant and stroked the name on it.

Looking at that name brought back memories of the wind and snow when he was a teenager, as well as that person in the blizzard.

Yan Ming was the first person who treated him well when he was a teenager, without expecting anything in return.

Fu Changling couldn't help but smile at the thought of that time.

He remembered being betrayed by his stepmother, falling into the Xuanji Secret Realm, and going blind when Yan Ming came to his rescue when he was at his most vulnerable.

He was actually very terrified when he was first rescued by Yan Ming. He didn't know how long Yan Ming would protect him, but he knew that this was the Xuanji Secret Realm from Yan Ming. Despite the fact that he had never been to the Xuanji Secret Realm, he had heard about its dangers. He was grateful that Yan Ming was willing to save him, and he wouldn't be surprised if Yan Ming abandoned him.

But trying to comprehend was one thing—everyone is often consumed with fears about a hopeless future.

Thus, he spent those days making every effort to be accommodating to Yan Ming, attempting to help in any way he could.

But he was indeed useless back then.

He had no words to cheer Yan Ming up, and his magic powers were also quite weak.

He couldn't do anything to help, so he kept thinking that Yan Ming would surely abandon him, and it was only a matter of time before he did—whether it would be in a day, two days, or three.

Because of this, he always tossed and turned at night.

"Why aren't you sleeping?" Yan Ming asked him out of the blue one night.

Fu Changling was hesitating about telling him when he felt Yan Ming turn to face him. He took his hand and placed it on his chest, asking him calmly, "If you are worried about something, you can write it down here and tell me."

As he held his hand, Fu Changling could feel the calluses and the frosty warmth of his hand from the long sword practise.

Fu Changling shuddered slightly. Then he heard Yan Ming say gently, "Don't be afraid. Just tell me."

He remained still. After a long while, he finally told Yan Ming, stroke by stroke, on his chest, "You will leave me behind."

When he was done, he added three more words, as if he had written his own ending: "I will die."

Yan Ming remained silent for some time before saying calmly, "If I said I would protect you until we could get out of here, I will not abandon you. If you are unsettled by this, there is no need."

"I'm useless," Fu Changling scrawled once more on his chest. "I can't help you."

"It doesn't matter," Yan Ming said calmly, "you're not obligated to help me. All you need to do is be yourself."

"I saved you because it was in my heart to do so, without you having to do anything."

These were words that Fu Changling had never heard before in his entire life.

He grew up in the Fu Clan, one of Yunze's top cultivation clans, as the Fu family's eldest son, yet he carried the status of an illegitimate child.

Without a mother, he had to earnestly please all those around him in order to survive well and live with dignity. His father, his stepmother, and even his younger brother and uncles...

He was used to always wearing a smile on his face since he needed to be on everyone's good side. That was the first time someone had told him—All you need to do is be yourself.

His eyes stung a little at these words, and he felt wretched. He hung his head with his palm still resting on that person's chest. His throat was choking with pain, and he wanted to say something to lighten the mood but found that he could say nothing.

At this moment of extreme wretchedness, Yan Ming placed his hand on his shoulder and said, in an all-too-common tone, "Sleep. I'm here."

It was at that moment that the first awakening of love in an adolescent began to bloom and take root in him.

That night, he didn't sleep. He just waited till Yan Ming had fallen asleep before reaching out with a quivering hand and gently touching Yan Ming's face.

He ran his fingers over the corners of his eyes, the tips of his brows, the bridge of his nose, his lips, and his jaw.

He depicted this person with his fingertips. He wanted to know what this person looked like and hoped that one day, if they met again, he would be able to tell at a glance that this person was Yan Ming.

From then on, he began to constantly ask Yan Ming about his origins, but he rarely mentioned them. He vaguely mentioned something about his past, but not enough for anyone to figure out who this person really was.

Sometimes, when he talked to Yan Ming about their future interactions after they had gotten out, he never answered.

They were in the Xuanji Secret Realm, attempting to figure out the secret realm's rules. Back then, Fu Changling lacked the later experience and luck that he now possesses. They were like big-headed flies wandering around, not knowing anything except that they would perish if they failed to figure out the rules during the monthly sacrificial ritual. They went through the entire town for clues before Yan Ming discovered some a few days before the ritual. He was able to seize the Spirit-Gathering Pagoda, a magic tool that provided the spellcaster with a continual flow of spiritual power and temporarily increased his abilities.

For the sake of this magic tool, they were pursued all the way out of town by its keepers. Outside the town, in the freezing cold weather, Yan Ming dragged him all the way to run erratically. Halfway through the run, Yan Ming suddenly shoved him to the side, and he stumbled and rolled down a nearby slope, clutching the Spirit-Gathering Pagoda. Then he heard people running after Yan Ming, and he crawled out of the freezing snow. He felt that his limbs were frozen in the blizzard, that his entire body was rigid, and that his heart was also cold.

As he hugged the Spirit-Gathering Pagoda, he felt terrified, especially terrified.

This fear was not due to his inability to see or speak, nor was it due to the possibility of dying in this vast expanse of land. Rather, it was caused by his incapacity to do anything for the life or death of someone because he had no way of knowing whether that person was still alive, had already died, or had merely left.

That was the first time he felt a bone-deep sense of powerlessness that compelled him to get up. He climbed up the slope and then lay on the ground, crawling ahead and feeling his way inch by inch along the footprints he had felt.

He didn't know how long he had been crawling or how long the path would be. He thought of nothing and dared not think; all he knew was that if he couldn't find that person, he would just keep looking until he died.

So he struggled to make "ahh, ahh, ahh" sounds as he groped his way forward, until finally, a hand suddenly grasped his.

The person appeared to have been buried in the snow; his fingers were as stiff as rocks, and he seemed to be struggling incredibly to hold onto Fu Changling.

Then he called out "Changling" in a hoarse voice.

After a brief moment of shock, Fu Changling reached out and touched the person. Realising the person was almost buried in the snow, he reached out in a panic to dig the snow out of the way before pulling the person out.

He had no idea how many injuries Yan Ming had sustained, nor did he know exactly the extent of Yan Ming's condition. He only knew that Yan Ming's vital Qi had almost been exhausted and that he was leaning limply against his shoulder; his entire body had already started to go cold.

Fu Changling quickly drew a healing formation and let the person lean against his shoulder. Then, while holding the Spirit-Gathering Pagoda, he continuously channelled its spiritual power into Yan Ming's body.

Yan Ming hadn't made a sound, so Fu Changling had no idea whether he was alright or not. Trembling, he desperately channelled spiritual energy into the other's Jindan until it could no longer take in any more spiritual energy, at which point he finally gave up.

However, while the other person stayed silent, he did not awaken either, and he was at a loss for what to do, leaving him helpless and powerless. After all his efforts, he eventually exhausted himself.

There was nothing else he could do, so he put Yan Ming down and lay beside him.

He took Yan Ming's hand in his, leaned in, and gently kissed him on the lips.

Yan Ming's lips were both cold and soft.

The moment he kissed him, Fu Changling suddenly felt as if the skies and the earth were at peace.

Originally, there were strong gusts of wind and heavy snowfall, but everything calmed down.

Snowflakes as fluffy as feathers fluttered across the sky and onto the earth, burying all the fighting, all the blood, and all the overwhelming despair, leaving only a blanket of white.

And they were both lying in the scarlet formation, which became the only hue on the ground that day.

He held Yan Ming and kissed him, feeling Yan Ming's warmth for the first time. In the bitterly cold snow, the warmth was so intense that it made him shiver.

His tears mixed with blood dropped into that kiss, giving it a taste of bloody tears.

Even though he couldn't see it or express it, in that moment, he suddenly felt that there was nothing to be resigned to, even if this was the end of his life.

Then, all of a sudden, he understood his own feelings. Nobody had ever told him what these feelings meant, but at that very moment, he learned it all on his own.

With a shaky hand, he choked back a sob and placed his fingertip on Yan Ming's chest, then began writing over his heart, stroke by stroke:

"Yan Ming, I love you."

"Yan Ming, Fu Changling wants to be with you."

...❦❧❦❧❦❧❦❧❦❧❦❦❧❦...

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