Chapter One//Ten Days

This story is dedicated to a gril out there who feels lost and alone

...CHAPTER ONE...

I stood at the edge of the cliff that gloomy Sunday.

Part of me needed a place to think without being interrupted, and another part of me actually thought of jumping that day.

The sky was a dark grey, and then I felt the first cold drop of rain. And then the second. Pretty soon, I was standing there as rain ran down my face and soaked my hair. It was cold and I was shaking, but I did my best to ignore it.

I didn't bother putting my hood up or seeking shelter. If I decided to jump that day, I would have landed in water anyways. Getting wet beforehand won't matter.

I took a step closer to the edge. The waves crashed down below, but they were too far away from me to hear. I could still imagine the sound of them roaring as I got closer and closer after jumping. Soon enough, I'd be relieved with the calming sound of water before it all ended. It would be the best way to go.

I need to do it. Now, I thought. Because waiting would only cause me to change my mind and complicated everything. And in the end, death is inevitable, so why not just end the pain now? Prolonging it is useless.

I close my eyes, just relaxing and letting the rain consume my thoughts. I was about to step off, when suddenly, a voice that I didn't recognized spoke.

"Please… Don’t do it."

I froze, unable to move. Another obstacle. Another person standing in the way of my only way out.

"Everything will be okay. Ending it all isn't the answer…"

I slowly turned around. My eyes were already glazed over and a tear managed to slip out. It was unnoticeable due to the rain, but my red eyes had to be obvious.

"My name's Grayson. Grayson Anderson." He took a small step closer.

"Just go," Was all I managed to spit out.

"And leave you here? What kind of person would I be if I did that?" He smiled sadly.

"I just… I've made up my mind. You're wasting your time." I looked behind me and back down to the water. 'Soon' I thought.

"Please. You have so much to live for." He took another small step forward.

"You don't know me. I don't know have friends. No one will care if I die, so I'd rather be dead and at peace than be alive and stuck here." My voice trembled. "This place… it's hell. All of it."

"Well I want to be your friend. I'll care. And I'll feel so ashamed of myself if you end up jumping." He seemed genuine with his words, but I just knew that once he saves me, he would forget about me. He wouldn't actually want to stay and be my friend. It would ruin his image if he was seen with me.

And even if he did want to be my friend, I wouldn't want it to be under these circumstances. He would only want to be my friend because he'd feel obligated to do so. I didn’t want to be looked at like some charity case. I'd want my friendship to be real and genuine.

Pity. It would all be out of pity. That's not how friendship is supposed to work.

"I.. I just want to die. I've wanted to die for a long time, but now I finally have the courage to do so, and it doesn't seem to be scary anymore." I replied but only the half-truth. Yes, I've wanted to die for a long time. There was nothing to look forward to. I didn’t fit in here, but I knew I'd fit perfectly with the water. I'd jump and the water would pull in for an endless hug, and I would just swim forever.

The lie, however, was that it doesn’t seem scary anymore. I was more willing to go through with it, yes, but I was still terrified. I didn't know what to expect afterwards, and if it would hurt.

My life was the only life I'd ever get, so choosing between life and death will never be an easy decision.

Grayson took another two step closer to me. "Let me help you. Let me help you see how beautiful life can be. You don’t need to die to find peace." He held his hand out to me, and I could only see that his eyes were filled with hope. A sense of hope that I would take his hand and choose to live.

So I took it. He pulled me in for a tight hug. I was brawling but he still stayed. And after a few minutes, he asked me for my name.

"Amber Fields." I replied quietly.

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