Family Line | Song by Conan Gray

Each night and day was followed by my mother and father's argument. Sleeping was never peaceful.

Cries and screams were always heard, it was always a female voice. My mother's.

My father rarely talks with us, he'd always smile and laugh with other people, look at me like I'm his pride and joy. It was just a show, to them he was a great father. But to me and my sister he was a monster who'd always take out his anger on us.

My mother always had this emotionless and empty expression on her dreaded yet beautiful face. She had always taken the punches from my father for me and my sister. Yet, she never fought or stand up to him. I understand her, she always trembles around my father.

Until she said,

"I'm leaving, I'm tired of you and your fake apologizes. And, of course, I'm taking the children with me."

So she did, she took me and my sister with her.

Every time my bruises show, people always asks "Are you doing okay ?" "Did your parents do this ?"

I always reply "They're just the one who gave me this life."

I am truly my parent's son after all.

My family line was scattered across everywhere. Great lying skills was just something that I got from my mother's side. Why do I have my monstrous father's eyes ? But at least I have my sister's eyes when I shed tears. I could run away from my family line, but I couldn't hide from it.

It's hard to explain my harsh childhood with words. Holidays and family reunions always hurts, I watch the actually great fathers with their little girls and wonder, "What the hell did I do to deserve this kind of life ?"

How could you hurt the little kids who you claimed to be your own pride and joy ? Not sure if I can forget this cruel childhood you gave me, but I know I can't forgive you. I have to see my sister pained expression while hugging me tight every day. How cruel. My mother trying to comfort us while being scared herself.

Lies and pain was scattered across this cursed family line. Lying skills I got from my mother, your cruel eyes I got, my sister's eyes when I shed tears.

Look at all the things I tried to undo this childhood, all of my sufferings and your fake excuses. I'm going to admit it.

I was indeed a kid. But I was never clueless.

You said you loved us.

But someone who loves you would never do such cruel things to you. All of my dark past, I tried to hide it with a smile. But now I realized, would I even change the past I tried so hard to hide from the world ? We might share the same face and last name, but, we are never the same.

I could run away, but couldn't hide from this family line.

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