Chapter Four

Chapter Four

I ran towards his direction breathlessly. I grabbed his wrist right when I caught up to him. He stops in his tracks and look back to me. His gaze was once again so cold and piercing as he glared at me from the corner of his eye. My grip of his wrist slowly loosens, but he immediately pulls away. “You need something?” he asks, his tone dry and cold. I clear my throat and give him this awkward smile.

“Well…I’d just like to ask…could we have a little talk this evening? There’s something I’d like to…discuss.”

“Again? Didn’t we already talk?”

“Ah, no, it’s not that…”

“Then what?”

I take a long pause, just staring into space. “well…” I trail off. I then look back to the set, watching as everyone was observing me from afar. “right, anyway, I have to go…so I’ll (probably) see you again,” I say to Junji as I ran back to the set. Once I arrive, Yoojung walks up to me.

“You alright? What’d he say to you?” he asks.

“Nothing too major,” I say. “anyways, let’s just continue with the filming.”

.... . .

...

It'd been hours since I’d arrived here in Haebangchon, and lord it was chaotic. Not gonna lie, but I wish I hadn’t came here. I would have forced our manager to change a setting to a different place if I’d known that I’d be seeing Junji almost daily. I sit in my rooftop, staring soullessly at my phone screen, which stayed black and empty. I couldn’t tell if I was waiting for something, but I was sure that it would’ve been Junji. I would’ve been waiting for him to call me, even though I knew that was impossible in this situation we’re in. I glance down to the bottom of the 50ft drop from my rooftop to the ground. God…I could tell how high I was. Anxiety started kicking in whenever I’d just take one glance down.

I shake my head and let out a shuddery breath as I looked away from the ground. I look forward, towards the house in front of mine. It was a family of two. A mother and daughter. I’m guessing that they moved in while I was gone, as the house used to be vacant when I used to live here. Through the light inside the house, I could tell that someone was headed for the balcony, which had been lined up perfectly with my rooftop. Though expecting the mother, I see someone much more unexpected than whom I thought it would be. Junji. Well ****. That man was cheating on me with a girl, and even had a child with her. This was just unbelievable. I had to confirm if I was not mistaken, though. And I knew that it would be the perfect time to do so, as we could literally talk from the distance we were apart from.

I call out his name, then he flicks his head to my direction.

“Oh, Rie. Didn’t expect to see you there.” He muttered.

I then clear my throat. “Shouldn’t I be the one saying this to you?”

“…what do you mean?”

“I should be asking why you are in some girl’s (who’s probably your lover’s) house. You even managed to have a child with her.”

“What? What are you talking about? Since when did I have a child with some girl?” he asked, in disbelief of what I’d just told him.

“Well your literally in her house! It’s already gotten too obvious!” I explained.

“Oh wait, don’t tell me…you think that me and Hye Yoon (the house tenant) are dating?”

“Isn’t that correct, though…?”

He then cracks a laugh. I didn’t get what he found so humorous about this situation. I mean, who would finding cheating funny? A player, that’s for sure.

“Oh, please. She’s much older than me! I’m not even dating her! I just help her with paying rent, as we live in the same district. And our relationship is just friends, alright? We’re nothing more than close friends. If you want proof, I can even call her up here right now.” Oh God…now that’s embarrassing. I really thought for these 2 weeks that he’d been cheating on me with another person, and yet all his relation with that person was literally just friends. Gosh I’m such a dumbass. Dumbfounded, I look down to the floor of my rooftop, not even able to keep my gaze on Junji.

“Wow…you really are something,” I hear him mutter to himself. I then look back up to him and take a deep breath.

“Right. Sorry for the misunderstanding. I suppose this my hint to leave now. Have a good night.” I say in an embarrassed and formal tone.

I rush back downstairs, dreaded and ashamed. “you really…” I say to myself. Just then, the lights go out. Shít. I’m guessing it was a power outage. But this was quite normal for me. I just had to go out all the way to the back of the building and restart the power unit. Simple as that. Right when I reach, though, I once again see Junji near his power unit, fiddling with one of the fuses. He then hears my footsteps and looks to my direction.

“Oh, the power’s out for you too?” he asks.

“Yeah,” I mutter. The backstreet was completely dark and quiet. Unsettlingly quiet, in fact. My flashlight barely even made a significant difference in the darkness I was in.

I yank open the power unit and pull down the switch that’d provide the electricity. I’d have to wait for a couple 10 minutes before it would actually start restarting itself (yes I know, it’s a very slow power unit.). As I wait, Junji takes a discreet glance at me.

“Hey, um…can you help me with this? One of the fuses came out, and I need you to hold the flashlight for me…” he says as he tries to shove in one of the fuses in its socket. I walk up to him and grab the flashlight from his hand, pointing it to where he’d told me to.

“Right, once again, apologies for the misunderstanding I made earlier. I was just…quite clueless,” I say as I watch him fix in the fuse.

“Nah, it’s alright I guess. I suppose I get that a lot,” He says. After a minute of watching him struggle, he finally fits in the fuse to its place, and flips down the switch to restart the power supply. “thanks…” I hear him mutter. Though just as I was about to leave, I manage to trip myself on a rock and perfectly land on Junji. Well fuçk me. I land less than 10 centimeters apart from Junji, and God the tension between us was becoming so intimate and close, and I hated it to my gut. He held me by my upper waist as I lay my hands on his chest unintentionally. We stay like that for a while. At that point, I didn’t know what to do. Should I pull away? Should I stay like this to not seem awkward? I kept asking myself these questions, yet I could barely pick which one I should go for. My breaths were shuddery and made me sound nervous. And that’s even more embarrassing. Eventually, I pull away.

“Sorry…” I muttered. His gaze was still put on me, but I could tell that the warmth of it wasn’t sincere. He was just concerned for me at that moment, but not anytime else. I walk back to my power unit and flip the switch back on. The light in front of my house turned on, so I’m guessing the power in the entire house was back.

“Well, that’s my cue to leave,” I mutter as I slowly walked away from the power unit. As I shut it closed, I take one more glance at Junji before finally heading back. And just right when I knew I’d gotten out of sight from him, I ran all the way back upstairs.

.... . .

...

What. The. Hell. Just. Happened. I thought to myself over and over again. I hide myself under the covers out of embarrassment, not wanting to ever come out after thinking about what I’d done with Junji just now. Could I just stay in my room forever just to reflect on my mistakes at this point?

I come out of the covers and check the time on my phone. 1:20 a.m., it read. I’ve been awake for 2 hours while overthinking this shít. 2 hours. Good God, am I okay at this point? My gaze then shifts to the window. Since when did the night become so dull? I thought, gazing more and more to the sky. I remembered it as so clear and bright, full of stars and galaxies. Now it was just a dull, blueish grey that filled in every corner of the sky. Or was it just because I wasn’t seeing it the same? What if it was completely alike with what I used to see, but I’m just not putting much attention to it?

I once again walk out to the rooftop and look upon all the other buildings that I was surrounded by. Almost all the lights were off, leaving me in the slowly thickening darkness. I started to feel much more at ease. More peaceful. I actually felt good for once, after so long. In the distance, I could see the beach where I had the filming taken place. I might have to go back there tomorrow, but at this point, who knows. I take a deep breath and take in the fresh air into my lungs. Finally, I look skyward. God…I really didn’t see it right from inside. It was much more different than what I’d thought it would be. The beauty of it had taken me aback, and it was all I could keep my eyes on.

I’d wished I could’ve seen this with Junji before we broken up. He would’ve loved this, I’m sure. My breaths become deep and shuddery. I could tell I was tearing up. Why’d it have to end like this? Couldn’t he at least talk it out with me? I place my palms over my face and wipe off the tears that’d already managed to seep out. My head was lost in thought and I could barely even pat any attention to my surroundings. I gaze around myself. I should have been appreciative of what I was surrounded by. I should have kept my eyes on its beauty. Instead, I cry. I cry about some person who doesn’t even give a fuçk about me.

It's pointless. I mutter through sobs. I shake my head and try to get myself back together. I go back inside and try to sleep, which was incredibly impossible that night. When I woke up, as expected, my eyes were bloodshot, and I looked sleep deprived. And I probably was. I wasn’t doing well anyway. I pick up my phone and go to Yoojung’s messages.

Me: “hey, can I take a day off today? I feel quite sick.”

Yoojung: “why is that? D’you sleep late again?”

Me: “exactly.”

Yoojung: “I’ve never been this disappointed before. I’ll allow an off day for you, but make sure you can come tomorrow as well.”

Me: “fine.”

I turn off my phone and place it back on the bedside table. Thank God Yoojung allowed me to do things like this. If it were someone different, I’m sure they would’ve forced me to come over to work, even when I couldn’t. I then get out of bed and wash up, as I knew I was most likely a mess at that state.

Right when I was about to go downstairs to have breakfast, though, I saw the note I put up on the fridge yesterday. It was for the groceries I had to get to last me two weeks or so. I sigh and take off the note, reading through it as I head for the front door. “I suppose it’s not too much. I’ll just be in and out with this,” I mutter. Just as I came outside, though, I saw Hye Yoon outside her doorstep with her daughter. She then glances up at me.

“Oh, good morning…Rie, if I’m not mistaken?” She says.

“Ah, yes, that’s me! You must be…Mrs. Hye Yoon?”

“Yes, that is me. And may I ask what a young man like you is doing this early in the morning?”

“Groceries.”

“Oh, same here, in fact!”

“Well that’s a coincidence. Shall we go together, then?”

“Why, I’d love that.”

The three of us (or what I thought was the three of us) walked to the store together, catching up on each other’s days before we met. She told me that her husband was this bitchy person who’d cheat on her all the time, which was why she stayed as a single parent. We talked much more than that, but it’s most likely I couldn’t remember what it was. Even though, I must say, Hye Yoon is a rather friendly person. She’s quite social with others. And…I just like how she can be comfortable to talk with almost anyone, even if she’s only known them for a few days. Junji’s lucky to be able to talk with her all day. Really lucky, in fact. Or at least, that’s what I thought..

As we come back out of the store (literally right when I stepped out), two kids (most likely teenagers) zoomed pass by us swiftly, almost knocking me over. I stumble back, but still standing. “oh, don’t mind those two. They can be a bit of a bother sometimes,” Hye Yoon said as we watch them run off.

“What are their names?” I ask her. She takes a long pause.

“I believe they go by “Mill” and “Nine,” although I might be mistaken,” She said, still watching them run off. “they might be studying in one of the high schools nearby.”

“Ah…I see. You must see them often, right?” I ask as we start heading home.

“Why yes, I do. Every time, after school, I’d see them together, always fumbling about,” she says.

“You always talk as though your 10 years older than your actual age.”

“Is that an insult?”

“…maybe…?”

“And this is why I don’t date people anymore, since men are just such disrespectful bãstards!”

“Are you calling me a bãstard?”

“Yes.”

“Aw, fuçk you,” I mutter under my breath.

“Hey, don’t say that in front of a child—” Hye Yoon says, but then cuts off. I could feel as though something was wrong. Very wrong… Confused, I ask, “what’s wrong?” She then gestures to her left. Sae Mi (her daughter) was gone. We’ve lost Sae Mi.

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