CHAPTER 2

We open with Ignatius in his room, scribbling away about how everything was better in the Middle Ages and now everything is going (more or less literally) to hell.

Ignatius worries about his pyloric valve, which has been snapping shut and causing him to bloat; he is concerned that he is entering a stage of bad luck.

His mother yells at him through the door, but he belches and then finds he's gotten an erection.

He masturbates thinking about his beloved—and now deceased—dog.

We leave Ignatius in his room, and head back over to the Night of Joy, where Burma Jones is applying for a job.

Jones explains to Lana Lee that he needs a job or the police will keep hounding him. Lana Lee says he can be a porter doing odd jobs, but offers to pay him almost nothing; Jones agrees because he doesn't have much choice.

In comes Darlene, who is late because her cockatoo was sick. Lana Lee doesn't think that's much of an excuse—but what can you do if your cockatoo is sick?

Lana also yells at Darlene for encouraging the Reillys the night before, when customers like that are no good for business.

Darlene shows Jones the broom and tells him she dreams of doing an exotic dance number.

And now we're back to poor Officer Mancuso, who is riding on a motorcycle wearing only a tee-shirt and Bermuda shorts along with a false beard as his costume for the day, and is on his way to visit the Reillys.

Mancuso explains that the man whose building they damaged is willing to let them pay him back in installments.

Even so, Mrs. Reilly doesn't know how she'll pay; Ignatius tells her she can't mortgage the house.

Mr. Mancuso encourages Mrs. Reilly to take up bowling. It won't pay for the damage, but it's something.

Ignatius is so unpleasant to Mancuso that he apologetically leaves.

Ignatius retreats into his room, but his mother ruthlessly invades, and tells him… he has to get a job.

The horror.

Ignatius bickers and insults Mancuso and his mother and the world in which they live, but he's stuck. He's going to have to get a job.

He worries, though, that no one will hire him because he is too good for this century.

Also, when he had a job at the Public Library, he was almost instantly fired.

He was also fired from his teaching job at the college when he threw students' papers out the window. (The students were demonstrating against him because he wouldn't grade the exams.)

Over to Jones again, who is on the bus feeling irritated because various white people are scared of him for no reason.

And we end the chapter with Ignatius at the movie theater, watching an unnamed film, which is probably the 1962 Doris Day feature Billy Rose's Jumbo.

Ignatius screams out loud over and over about how awful the movie is, irritating the patrons and management. Ignatius himself seems to be having a good time, though.

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