14

Perhaps it was stubbornness, perhaps it was spite, but Jeongguk managed to lift his hands high enough to wrap his cold metal fingers around taehyung’s. His grip wasn’t tight, taehyung could’ve easily ripped his hands away, that didn’t matter to Jeongguk. It wasn’t the point. He did it, even as his arms shook from strain he didn’t care. If it made taehyung smile—he would do it gladly.

“Holy shit, this is incredible.” taehyung exhaled. “You—you’re incredible.”

Jeongguk suddenly felt uneasy, his chest filled with a warmth that he couldn’t explain. His core began to whir with life as he watched joy color taehyung’s delicate features. There was no doubt that he was beautiful, and not because he was an attractive man. In those few short weeks taehyung made him realize that beauty wasn’t just skin deep, it went further than that. taehyung was beautiful in ways that many would miss. Beautiful in a way that hardly existed anymore. He saw beauty in the ugliness around him, he saw things for what they really were. Looking at the chaos and destruction he saw potential instead of hopelessness. He saw Jeongguk and knew there was more to him than anyone else realized.

            "I’m not going to hurt you.”

Without meaning to, Jeongguk began rubbing his thumb against the back of taehyung’s hand. It wasn’t a fluid or natural motion to him, his knuckle clicked every single time his thumb moved. Jeongguk was too busy looking into taehyung’s eyes to notice. He often thought about how much he liked his eyes. He liked how the light reflected off of them, he liked how they were a dark brown when he was lost in thought but dripped with honey when he laughed. There was life in them, a life that Jeongguk admired.

“There is beauty in life.”

Beauty…

Being alive is beautiful.

The thought made him smile.

“I think that’s enough work for the day.” taehyung suddenly muttered, pulling his warm hands away from Jeongguk. “You should get some rest.”

But — I don’t want to…

Jeongguk’s face fell as taehyung began triggering his shutdown procedure. A symphony of clicks and beeps that translated out to goodbye in his mind.

“Don’t look at me like that!” taehyung protested halfheartedly. “Every single time, you know you’re going to wake up again. You’re safe.”

I know, I just —

            “I promise you’ll be safe.”

— I hate goodbyes.

Sighing, taehyung helped Jeongguk lay down flat. “Goodnight, little canary. I’ll see you in the morning.”

            Shutdown sequence initiated

            Shutting down…

            Shutting down…

            Shutting down…

            Shutdown interrupted, standby mode activated.

Once Jeongguk appeared to be shut down, taehyung began pacing the room with his tawny hair grasped tight in his hands. He looked—distraught. Jeongguk wanted to ask why, wanted to know what sort of thoughts careened through his troubled mind when he thought no one was watching. He wanted to know everything. He worried about taehyung, he cared about him.

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