Chapter 1

"You bitch!"

I heard it before felt it. She had slapped me. I refused to cry or else that would only make it worse.

I've gotten used to this. The name calling, the slapping, the constant smell of booze and cigarettes. But I just tell myself that deep down, she still loves me. When my father was alive, she used to kiss me and hug me, I believed that I was everything to her.

I was wrong.

"You're a slut and I hate you. It was your fault! Everything! You did this!" She shouted as she pushed me on the floor. "Rot in hell, you filthy *****." And with that I was left alone to soak in my own tears and shame.

When I was 7 my dad died in a shooting. It was a drive by, but they shot the wrong person. I witnessed everything. From the moment the bullet hit his head, I was there. Watching in despair at such a tender age, holding on to my favorite stuffed animal, while my father died.

Right. In front. Of me.

To say my mother took it bad was an understatement. She turned to drugs and liquor for comfort and since then, it's like I don't know her anymore. She's been abusive and has been blaming me for the accident ever since. But I would honestly do anything for that woman, cause although I was scum to her, there was a time when she genuinely loved me. And I still love her no matter what.

I heard my phone go off. I saw it on the table and reached over for it. Although I live a poor life, I take care of my stuff. I got this phone for my 7th birthday and I've had it ever since.

The message was from my best friend Solyna (A/n: It's pronounced Soleena.)

Hey Iris! Meet me at the usual spot.

Solyna and I have been best friends for 8 years now. She knows all about my mom and everything and is the most supportive and understanding person ever. I typed a quick sure and went upstairs to get ready. I threw my curly black hair up into a messy bun and threw on some sweats. I'm half Italian so I absolutely love my hair. I put on my sneakers and grabbed my phone to leave. When I was leaving I saw my mom passed out on the couch with an empty flask on the floor beside her. I rolled my eyes but kissed her on the head nonetheless.

When I arrived, I saw Solyna on a park bench waiting for me. "Hey Rissy!" she exclaimed. She's always so perky and happy. Sometimes I wish her personality would rub off on me. I smiled and pulled her into a tight hug. "Hey Lee-lee." I replied. We started talking about everything that was going on in our lives until I took out my phone and saw the time.

Oh shit.

"No no no! She's gonna kill me!" It was already 8:30 but because I was having so much fun, I never even realized that it got this dark.

"I have to go Lee-lee, I'm so sorry." I apologized. "It's ok Rissy, I understand. But just promise you'll text me." "If I'm alive." I replied. We laughed and she pulled me into a bone crushing hug. I started my journey home not looking forward to what was coming next.

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