Chapter 13: Kind and Cruel

No way. I didn’t know it was this bad. What have I done?

“What’s going on?”

Sigren, who was drinking water, looked at me and put the glass on the table in a hurry. I walked towards Sigren’s bed in a dash before grabbing his collar tightly.

“What, what?!” The embarrassed Sigren tried to jerk back, but it didn’t work.

 “I’m sorry! I’m going to pull off your clothes for a moment!”

“What?! What are you talking about all of a sudden?”

I pushed his shoulder to the bed before Sigren finished grasping the situation. Since he was embarrassed, he fell back easily. Subsequently, I climbed very lightly on top of his wound so that he didn’t feel any pressure. I pulled off the clothes and asked for his understanding once again.

“Please, excuse me!”

“Don’t do it if you know it’s bad manners”.

If Sigren were determined and energized, I would never win. Fortunately, he was only blushing and struggling slightly.

“Wait a moment.”

“This is not a matter of ‘a moment’, it’s… HEY! Don’t put your hand on my stomach!” Sigren’s face turned redder as I moved my hands. His reaction made me feel like a scumbag hitting an innocent little boy.

Sorry, but I don’t have any ill intentions.

“You, really!”

Despite his resistance, he held his clothes in his hands. I shouldn’t have done this, but I couldn’t help it. Otherwise, I wouldn’t ever be able to check it. I put my finger on the upper side of the wound to avoid his injured abdomen. It wasn’t the normal smooth skin that should’ve been there, but rather felt lumpy and scarred. Realizing what it meant, my face turned white as lifted Sigren’s shirt up further.

“…..!”

At the shocking sight that opened right in front of me, my body became stiff at the moment. I didn’t mean to freeze up, but the fact that I had was painfully clear.

Then Sigren shouted loudly. “I told you to stop!”

I felt a strong force pushing my shoulders. My body helplessly fell off the bed.

“Ah!”

Sigren, who’d pushed me away, looked perplexed. He alternated looking at his hands and towards me, who was now sitting on the floor. “What .. you’re like a feather. Why are you being pushed so easily –”

At that moment, tears fell from my eyes.

Seeing that, Sigren hurried off the bed and sat next to me. “Hey… did you get hurt from falling?”

I shook my head silently. The floor was carpeted, so it didn’t hurt. But Sigren carefully stroked my head as he was trying to soothe me.

“No, don’t cry. Talk to me. Where is the pain? Shoulders? Legs? No, it shouldn’t be like this. I’ll call the healer quickly.” Sigren stood up as if trying to call the grandpa-healer, but before he could go, I grabbed his shirt. I felt his gaze looking down in an uncomfortable position. He got more restless as I cried.

I opened my mouth slowly to reassure him. “I’m not injured…”

I couldn’t speak to the end. Then, I recalled the wounds on Sigren’s body. Scars and deep blue bruises marked him all over his chest, arms, and sides. They weren’t just simple injuries. Even though I wasn’t very versed in medicine, I could see that at glance. Those were evidence that he was deliberately burned and suffered from unilateral violence. The wounds contained malice that had been repeated for many years.

“Sigren.”

“Uh?”

“Your wound, who did it?”

Sigren’s face was hard on my question. “Did you hear from the healer? Did you try to take my clothes off just to check it?”

I nodded a small nod. “Uh-uh”

Sigren ruffled his hair roughly.

“What? That’s why you cried? I told you to stay out when I took off the bandage. Now you’re crying on your own?”

I reached out and embraced him.

“…..”

Sigren’s body stiffened by my sudden action. Black hair brushed my cheek. Sigren smelled of disinfectant. It even made me feel more sorry for him. It was my fault that he suffered ridiculously for a long time. It was all because of a simple sentence that he had an unfortunate childhood.  Honestly, I had never imagined it concretely. I never thought I’d see it in front of my eyes. The difference between simple words and the reality in front of my eyes was enormous. I was scared seeing the result of that sentence, like when I’d checked Fiona’s situation in person.

I asked quietly in his ear. “Why did that happen?”

Sigren replied bluntly. “Not a big deal. Many mercenaries are tough, and I’m the youngest and weakest, so I am the target.”

Subsequently, Sigren snapped his body back. I relaxed my arms and met his gaze.

“Sigren, don’t say it’s not a big deal.”

“Are you pitying me?”

I slowly shook my head. This wasn’t a feeling of pity, it was one of guilt. It was true that I’d experienced the cruelty of the battlefield with my body. However, somewhat, his world felt like it was something distant from my own world. When I saw his wounds, it really hit me. I trembled at the cruelty of the world I’d created. This world was beyond my imagination.

Sigren was still young in this world while I had already experienced love and protection from grown-ups in my past world. It was my fault that he suffered from long-term violence in an unusual environment. He had such injuries yet I was complaining that it was hard to get along with him. Frankly, I was ashamed of myself. Even if Sigren hated me in the future, I had to be really good. Always be on his side. It would be the best apology I could give for all of his unerasable scars.

“Sigren, I’m sorry.”

Sigren laughed at the change of my incomprehensible attitude.

“You’re apologizing for undressing me, are you?”

“It’s not like that.”

The tears that I thought had stopped started to shed again. Sigren wiped my tears with his sleeve while lightly clicking his tongue. “Don’t cry. It’s not even your business, why are you crying?

His touch as he wiped away the tears was very careful. As expected, he was a sweet kid.

“Sigren.”

“What now?”

I reached out and carefully held Sigren’s cheeks with my fingers. Due to my sudden action, those blue-grey eyes shook helplessly.

I whispered to him, as if it was a spell, “I won’t hurt you.”

“…..”

Perhaps Sigren’s wounded heart would not heal until the heroine shows up. But until then I will protect him. I don’t want him to be wary of me anymore.

With such a small wish, I laughed bashfully. “So let’s be friendly.”

Sigren opened his eyes wide as he finally came to his senses. Then he immediately murmured, avoiding my gaze.

“You cried on your own, now you’re laughing… you’re doing whatever you want, you.”

His face didn’t seem to hate what I said. So, I decided to put some hope on it.

Yes, we should be good friends.

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