Everything has changed

Author's POV

Jungkook grabbed the blue diary of secrets from the table and faltered to Jimin's room with heavy heart and crying soul.

Reaching at the door ,he directly went for the door knob to open the door without knocking but found it locked. After trying few times, he finally knocked almost impatiently, already wanting to get done with everything.

By not getting any response even after knocking sufficient amount of times, he started thumping on door followed by his calls for his hyung.

Lack of response from the other side of the door made something in Jungkook's mind to panick, so he ran back to his room finding the spare key of Jimin's room in his bed side drawer which Jimin gave him willingly so that whenever Jungkook needs anything from his room, he can take it right away, without having to wait for Jimin to return home.

Jungkook came back with the key and took no time to insert the metal in the hole of the lock , turning it to right until it made a click sound, indicating, the door is unlocked now.

He then, turned the knob right with his right hand while holding the diary close to his chest in left hand and pushed it open only to find Jimin passed out on the floor few inches away from the door which made the door restricted to open fully.

Jungkook's breath hitched looking at Jimin on floor. He quickly kneeled down, placing Jimin's head in his lap while constantly calling for his name.

"Hyung! Hyung, open your eyes!" He called out with already tear filled eyes while checking Jimin's pulse which were almost normal , making Jungkook sigh in relief with still almost water pouring eyes.

He carefully held Jimin up and made him lay on the bed. (A/N We can't deny the fact that Jungkook does have a good strength which have nothing to do with being a top or bottom)

Lamp was still glowing yellow at the side table, spreading light on bed and areas around it. That is why only after laying Jimin on bed he could see his face clearly which showed the hints of his fresh breakdown. Red nose , puffy eyes , swollen lips and cheeks and tousled hairs , nothing that Jungkook haven't seen before but it hits different this time as he never tried to acknowledge the real reason behind that condition before. And now when he knows it, all of the memories in his brain which were just as basic as other random memory, started scratching themselves to remove the upper layer of fake reasons and started showing painful body of reality which actually is hurting him now.

He started stroking Jimin's hairs back to make them look more neat and while doing so ,he noticed the swollen red dent with the hint of now half clotted blood on his left upper forehead.

Jungkook hissed while examining the wound with his finger, careful to not touch the damaged area which can spread infection. He then stood up, tossing the diary on bed and went to get first aid box and other things from bathroom.

He came back with a bowl filled with normal water, a towel and a first aid box. He placed the bowl on the bedside table and dipped the towel in it, after squeezing out the access water he wiped Jimin's face and neck with it diligently.

Then he opened the box, taking out cotton ,wetting it in adequate amount of disinfectant, he started cleaning the wound. After cleaning, he made sure to put the right antiseptic on his wound, following by the bandage.

When he thought he was done he pulled blanket over Jimin and decided to let him rest properly, postponing the talk he was going to have this day.

He took bowl and box in hand , turned off the lamp and stoop up to leave.

As he walked 3 steps towards the door. "Nghhh.." He heard Jimin groaning which made him stop abruptly, thinking Jimin's head is hurting him.

"Are you okay?! Is your head paining too much?! Should I call doctor?!" Jungkook started throwing questions one after another while pacing towards the bed and turned on the lamp again.

Jimin, who was now trying to sit up while holding his head looked at panicked Jungkook and the memory from afternoon started hitting his senses again.

"Jungkook." He exclaimed in surprise and shock as he was already expecting Jungkook never wanting to see him again.

"Are you okay now?" Jungkook asked again with nothing but worry on his face, heart and brain.

"Kookie, are you mad at me?" Jimin muttered hastily instead of answering while sitting up completely which made Jungkook to realize what circumstances brought him here at first place.

"I think you're fine now." Jungkook voiced while sitting and nodding to himself as a check that his hyung is fine now.

"Kooki—"

"There's your diary, you can hide it now." Jungkook cut him off and spoke glumly while pointing his index at diary on bed.

"You read it?" Jimin asked anxiously and Jungkook nodded after being silent for a minute.

Jimin's heart stopped for a while looking at now silent Jungkook sitting in front of him, looking everywhere but his eyes.

"Are you mad at me?" Jimin asked again, this time with softer voice while extending his hand to touch Jungkook who backed away making Jimin to take his hand back in his lap with pained expression of rejection on his face.

At this point, Jungkook wanted to leave but he felt his body frozen at it's place so he couldn't. Something in him wanted to stay and see what Jimin has to present now.

Jimin saw how Jungkook set there with his gaze fixed on his fisted palm in lap. "Won't you talk to me, Kookie?!" Jimin tried again, voice getting soft and softer with every next sentence.

First Jungkook bit his lower lip to pause any sound to come out of his mouth unwillingly then inhaled sharply. "Stop lov... Stop loving Me!" He said while shutting his eyes tightly closed and fists gripping on his shorts.

His state showed he knew how bad this is going to hurt Jimin, he knew it's hard for Jimin to stop everything ,he knew this is a hollow demand which won't be accepted ,despite it will cause a dent on Jimin's heart but still he let it out of his mouth.

After not getting any response from Jimin, Jungkook opened his eyes to look at Jimin who was looking right back at him with somewhat darkened orbs and unbelieving look on his.

"You know I never says 'no' to any of your demands but isn't it too much to ask, Jungkook? You really thought it's that easy? You think I've loved you all these years just to stop loving you abruptly when you want me to? That's not your place to tell me whom to love or not! " Jimin spat each word laced with anger and irritation. Jungkook really hit the twitching nerve in Jimin which resulted in Jimin's reversed mood and aura.

"But! But I don't want you to love me!" Jungkook debated , trying to maintain eye contact with Jimin which seemed hard for him as Jimin was practically diving into Jungkook's soul through his eyes.

"Jungkook! That's enough! Do you have anything else to say other than that? Because that's my right, do you really think you're capable of snatching something like that from me huh ? If you do ,then get over that thought already, Jungkook!" Jimin snickered while coming close to Jungkook's face to emphasize every word loud and clear for him to note in mind while Jungkook shivered at this new way of Jimin's tone and lack of his nickname engagement.

Jimin , who was now close to his love's face examined the tension and frawn on his face and sighed while holding his composure. "I love you and that's what gave me reasons to wake up and do better everyday, to be a better person everyday ,to be able to smile and laugh despite of hardships in life. So please Kookie!" That nickname made Jungkook to finally gave strength to look in Jimin's eyes again.

"I know kookie, you don't love me. And it's fine. Just don't ask for impossible." Jimin said softly while smiling and stroking Jungkook's hairs which he didn't reject this time.

Jungkook slowly relaxed in the touch and forgot about all the tensions for a minute as he leaned closer to Jimin which took Jimin by surprise.

He knew there must be bunch of thoughts going into Jungkook's mind which was shown in his actions, one second he was demanding impossible with stern look and this second he's being silent with surrendering look.

Getting the mind free from the future and outcomes Jimin made space for this moment and opened his arms for Jungkook ,not even sure if Jungkook would still let Jimin hold him.

But to Jimin's surprise, Jungkook did surrender himself in Jimin's arms while shifting close enough for their body to feel each other's heat.

Jimin took no time to encircle Jungkook's tiny waist in his strong arms while Jungkook wrapped his arms around Jimin's shoulder while pressing face in his neck.

"I'm still your hyung." Jimin ensured while massaging Jungkook's back to calm his turmoil of emotions down so that he can think straight.

Jungkook nodded, his face still burried deep in Jimin's neck. Jimin felt happy when he saw Jungkook actually listening to him and kissed his hairs.

Jungkook was constantly thinking, he was doing the opposite of what he thought of doing. His emotions took over him and now he's here, in Jimin's arm, making all the things more hard and tangled for himself.

After spending some peaceful time in Jimin's arm, thing's started getting real again. The breeze of reality hitting hard directly into Jungkook's mind. So he did it, he pushed Jimin with all he could and the look on Jimin's face was something Jungkook would want to erase from his memory.

"WHAT AM I DOING!?" Jungkook shouted , trailing his hands to his own head while breathing unevenly.

"Jimin! This is wrong! You can't love me! I'm a boy ,you're a boy. This is so wrong, you're out of your mind! " Jungkook kept blabbering and Jimin tried to hold him to calm him down.

"What's wrong in that? We both are humans. I can love anyone I want" Jimin explained back carefully to not trigger Jungkook more.

Jungkook looked at Jimin unbelievingly with large eyes and mouth agape open. "Do you have any idea what will be the consequences if people get to know about your unusual love? What will your parents think of you? Are you fine being nothing but a disappointment in every of your loved one's eyes? " Jungkook fought back , breathing heavy after completing his sentence which he didn't re-think before letting out.

Jimin couldn't lie that it hurted him so much, he was never affected by what world says or thinks but listening it all from Jungkook's mouth made him believe those were not other's but Jungkook's thoughts which came out of his mouth in flow, being caught up in emotions.

"I don't care about the consequences as long as we love each other. We'll get through any deprivation if we want and try." Jimin answered first question while smiling painfully. "If my parents love me they'll accept whatever I am and whomever I love. It sure will be hard for them to accept the unusual truth but in the end they'd never hurt whom they love." He answered second question while looking deep in Jungkook's eyes who looked back with amused face. "And, yes. Yes I'm fine being disappointment to world, to that world who never fails to bring any other human down only to feel self satisfied by other's struggles. Yes, I'm fine because the one who ever loved or loves, won't feel disgusted or disappointed in me for finding the love and happiness in life. I would trade anything for my loved one without thinking twice what world has to offer for me. " Jimin answered every question calmy,  his words came out secured with devotion and passion.

Jungkook couldn't believe Jimin is that hard to break. The level of irritation and anger starting rising into him and he stood up hastily. Stepping back a little.

"Maybe you're too blinded by your love to think straight. But I'm not! I don't love you and I don't see any reason to make my life miserable for myself, like you're doing to yourself." Jungkook spat out venom filled words which broke Jimin as he also stood up to get on Jungkook's level.

"Don't say that Kookie." Jimin plead while taking Jungkook's hand in his, which Jungkook snatched right away with disgusted look on his face.

"Stop calling me that!" Jungkook almost ordered and Jimin looked at him with open mouth as he couldn't process what to say.

"And I'll be very obliged if you don't spread anything about your unhealthy love among other hyungs." Jimin's heart dropped listening to that, he had never thought his love would be insulted like that by non other than his love himself.

"JUNGKOOK!" Jimin warned.

"Here you are, raising your voice at me now. That's how you fight from the world when you can't even listen a simple word from me, huh? You're fake, Jimin. Stop with that poor act of yours already! It was fine until I was oblivious about all of this but now that I know, I can't stand it. I can't stand you!" Jungkook continued spitting venom, continued aiming arrows on Jimin's heart and soul, leaving him injured by his own lover.

"You don't mean it. You don't mean anything you're saying baby." Jimin assured more to himself while trying to not look broken.

"Don't fuckin call me that!" Jungkook grumbled in anger and Jimin realized how everything has changed now. He never took Jimin's endearment word for him in wrong ways ever before as it was usual for members to call him 'baby' as he was literally a baby in the group.

"Don't make me hate you ,Jimin. You've already done enough of damage. And if you tell hyungs about this, you'll get that hate too." Jungkook warned last time before marching to his own room, leaving shocked, hurt, broken , rejected and sorrowful Jimin behind.

Loud thud of door shutting brought Jimin back to his senses and he immediately walked, practically ran to follow Jungkook.

"Jungkook! Listen to me!" He called but Jungkook was done with his talk so he kept going, ignoring the plea of being heard by Jimin.

As Jimin reached the hallway, the main door clicked open, tearing his gaze from Jungkook to the door. "AHH! JIMIN–AH! COME HERE FAST!" It was Jin, with lots of grocery bags and other packets in his arms, making it difficult for him to enter the hallway.

Jimin ignored being flooded with thoughts to stop Jungkook as he kept walking.

"AISH! JIMIIIIIN! COME HERE ,I SAID! IF THIS GLASS JAR FALLS AND BREAK ON MY FOOT, YOU'RE GONE! " Jin yelled in speed of light while trying to hold a glass jar of pickles between his arms and chin.

Jimin stopped and sighed looking at the direction of Jungkook's room and ran to help Jin before he drops anything and injures himself.

...✨✨✨...

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