2.3

“Y’know, I don’t want to be cremated.”

While enjoying the yakiniku, she had clearly brought up the wrong topic for this location.

“What was that?”

Since there was the possibility of me mishearing things,

I tried to get a confirmation, and she responded with a

serious face.

“Like I was saying, I don’t want to be cremated. I don’t

want to get roasted after I die.”

“Is that something you should be saying while eating

yakiniku?”

“It would be as if I really disappeared from this world.

Would it be impossible to let others eat me or something?”

“Let’s stop talking about the disposal of corpses while

eating meat.”

“I’d let you eat my pancreas.”

“Are you listening?”

“It seems that some countries have the belief that the

soul of the person that was eaten will continue to live on

inside the one that ate them.”

Somehow, or rather, as per usual, she looked like she

hadn’t heard me at all. Or maybe she did but was

disregarding me. I got the feeling it was the latter.

“Is it really impossible?”

“……It probably is. In terms of ethics. But in terms of

the law, I haven’t looked it up so I don’t really know.”

“I see, that’s too bad. So I can’t give you my pancreas,

huh.”

“I don’t need it.”

“You won’t eat it?”

“It’s precisely because of your pancreas that you’re going to die. So that must be where the largest fragment of

your soul is located. And your soul seems noisy.”

“That’s true.”

She roared cheerfully with laughter. She was already

this noisy while living, so there was definitely no way the

pancreas of this girl who had become an expert on the soul

would not be noisy too. I’m sorry, but I’d never eat

something like that.

If we compared, she had eaten much more than I did.

She stuffed herself with meat, rice, and horumon until she

said, “Ugh, it hurts.” As for me, I stopped when my stomach

bulged out to the appropriate level, and I was satisfied. Of

course, from the very beginning, I didn’t order more than I

could eat, and I didn’t commit the folly of burying the table

in side menu items like she did.

After the meal, the waiter took away the many empty

dishes as well as the obsolete charcoal stove, and at last

brought us sherbet as dessert. The girl who had proclaimed

“I’m not feeling well” and “it hurts” returned to life at the

appearance of the frozen treat. She took in a breath of fresh

air, and as though her complaints had all been lies, she

started being noisy again.

“Don’t you have any dietary restrictions?”

“Just basic ones. But, even those were a result of ten

years of evolution of the medical science here. Isn’t the

power of humans amazing? We may suffer from illnesses,

but they don’t threaten our daily activities at all. I guess that such an evolutionary pathway is directed at finding cures, huh.”

“That’s true.”

I didn’t really know much about medical science, but

this was one of the unusual cases where I agreed with her

opinion. I heard from somewhere that in this world, rather

than curing terminal illnesses, treatment is focused on

helping people live with them instead.

But no matter how I thought about it, technology that should continue to advance is still technology to cure, not a means to get along with diseases. However, even if we said that, we were aware that there was no way medical science was progressing on its own. For it to progress, the only means were to have those entering medical faculties study especially hard. Of course, she didn’t have the time to wait for that to happen. And as for me, there was no meaning in doing so.

“What’s next?”

“You mean in the future? I haven’t got it together.”

“I don’t mean that. Hey, I’ve been thinking about it

since before, but don’t you think you’re putting me in a

tough spot by cracking jokes like that?”

She gave me a blank look, then started to chuckle. She

was a person that had extreme changes in facial expressions.

I didn’t think that she, as a living creature, was very similar to me.

But it may have been precisely because we were

different that our destinies were different.

“Nope, I haven’t made those jokes in front of anyone

but you either. Wouldn’t most just pull back? But you’re

amazing. You’re speaking normally to a classmate that’s

going to die soon. If it were me, it would probably have been

impossible. It’s because you’re amazing that I can say what I want to say"

“You’ve overestimated me.”

Completely.

“But I don’t think so, since Secret-Knowing-Classmate-

kun doesn’t make sad faces in front of me. Or is it possible

that you cry for me at home?”

“I don’t.”

“Then you should!”

There was no way I’d cry. I wouldn’t do something

inappropriate like that. I didn’t feel sad, and I especially

didn’t want to show that emotion in front her. She didn’t

show sadness, so it was inappropriate for anyone to do so in

her stead.

“To backtrack on the conversation, what’s next?”

“Ah, the topic changed! Were you going to cry? I’m

going to buy a rope next.”

“No way I’d cry. A rope?”

“Oh, so you’re capable of saying things in a manly

manner, huh. Could you be trying to make my heart beat

faster? Yeah, a rope. For suicide.”

“Who would make a move on someone that’s going to

die soon? For suicide?”

“I did think that suicide would’ve been fine too - to kill

myself before the disease does. But I don’t think I’ll commit

suicide anymore. I’m just buying a rope for the sake of

mischief. Speaking of which, Secret-Knowing-Classmate-kun

is horrible! I may even be driven to suicide by the hurt.”

“Mischief? Seems like the talk about whether you’re

going to commit suicide or not has become all jumbled up.

For now, let’s just conclude this conversation.”

“That’s true - so have you had a girlfriend?”

“I don’t want to hear in detail how you were going to

conclude this, so let’s just stop talking now.”

Since she looked like she was going to say something, I

took the initiative and stood up. I didn’t see the order slip

anywhere around the table, so I called the waiter to ask for it and indicated that we were ready to leave. She said “let’s go”

while giggling, and stood up too.

Evidently, she was the type of person that didn’t end

any of their conversations with regrets. This was a

convenient characteristic of hers that she had revealed. I

thought that I should keep the initiative from now on.

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